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time with sd

Posted by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:41 PM
  • 50 Replies

so Dh told me this morning he was going to text his best friend and see if they could go out for coffee on Friday night. I told him uh no we have sd(dd) Friday. So now he is pouting. 

even if we have nothing planned. he should be home when we have her. he can go out for coffee next mon or next fri when we don't have her.  am I not right about this?

bc i know your going to ask. we have her eo fri-mon, every wed thurs when school is in session. 

every other week during summer break. and all of xmas break, 2 out of 3 days of fall break. 


by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
findingpeace201
by Silver Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:43 PM
Stand your ground
wise.toes
by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:51 PM

no you're not wrong. or he could take his daughter.

i refused to be a built in babysitter also. thankfully my (now ex) SO agreed with me.

kittensmittenz
by Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:53 PM
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IS that every Wed night and Thursday night and e/o weekend? So Mom has them M-Tues, you have Wed-Thurs, then share Fri-Sun? Isn't that 50/50? If so, I don't think it's a big deal if DH goes out for coffee, no. I wouldn't want him to make a habit, but if it's a 2-3hr thing, and you'll be home, not sure I see the big deal.

weaveress
by Bronze Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:55 PM


Quoting wise.toes:

no you're not wrong. or he could take his daughter.

i refused to be a built in babysitter also. thankfully my (now ex) SO agreed with me.

i'm not worrying about being the babysitter. sd is almost 14. and i spend plenty of one on one time with her. i just don't want him leaving when we have her. it's different with our kids who we have all the time. we only have her about half the time. we usually do family things when she's here. although i don't have anything planned this weekend yet. 

he won't take her because it's an hour away and closer to his work then home, and it's with his friend so sd would be bored out of her mind. 

weaveress
by Bronze Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:59 PM


Quoting kittensmittenz:

IS that every Wed night and Thursday night and e/o weekend? So Mom has them M-Tues, you have Wed-Thurs, then share Fri-Sun? Isn't that 50/50? If so, I don't think it's a big deal if DH goes out for coffee, no. I wouldn't want him to make a habit, but if it's a 2-3hr thing, and you'll be home, not sure I see the big deal.

yeah basically. so i should let him go? 

findingpeace201
by Silver Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 12:59 PM
He needs to be there
WickedPissah
by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 1:14 PM
2 moms liked this
I think you need to pick a lane and turn on your directional.
kittensmittenz
by Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 1:14 PM
1 mom liked this

I don't know what YOU should do, but I wouldn't have an issue with it if it's not a constant thing. It's just coffee with a friend, he'll probably be home by the time DSD goes to bed, and if you'll be home anyway, I don't see it as a problem. IF he is constantly going out, then yeah, that's different. 

Quoting weaveress:


Quoting kittensmittenz:

IS that every Wed night and Thursday night and e/o weekend? So Mom has them M-Tues, you have Wed-Thurs, then share Fri-Sun? Isn't that 50/50? If so, I don't think it's a big deal if DH goes out for coffee, no. I wouldn't want him to make a habit, but if it's a 2-3hr thing, and you'll be home, not sure I see the big deal.

yeah basically. so i should let him go? 


XXanonymousXX
by Gold Member on Feb. 18, 2015 at 1:30 PM
1 mom liked this
We have SD 50/50. I ask that DH be home with SD most of the time when she is here. I understand that things come up, and I'm happy to help when it can't be avoided. But if he can help it he needs to be here. For SD's sake, as much as my own.

At first he didn't get it, he didn't see the big deal. I ended up having to put my foot down and refuse to watch SD. I think he thought of us as an intact family. He couldn't comprehend why SD might be sad if he were out, or why I wouldn't be overjoyed to be home alone with her. It took a while, but I finally got through to him that I'm not her mom, that it's not the same thing, for her or I, no matter how much we love each other. He is the glue.
pusheen-kitty
by Battler on Feb. 18, 2015 at 4:20 PM
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exactly.. DHs friends can wait... and he shouldnt be reminded by his wife that this weekend is his weekend! smdh

Quoting XXanonymousXX: We have SD 50/50. I ask that DH be home with SD most of the time when she is here. I understand that things come up, and I'm happy to help when it can't be avoided. But if he can help it he needs to be here. For SD's sake, as much as my own.

At first he didn't get it, he didn't see the big deal. I ended up having to put my foot down and refuse to watch SD. I think he thought of us as an intact family. He couldn't comprehend why SD might be sad if he were out, or why I wouldn't be overjoyed to be home alone with her. It took a while, but I finally got through to him that I'm not her mom, that it's not the same thing, for her or I, no matter how much we love each other. He is the glue.
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