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Are the exes good about rescheduling visitation around emergencies?

Posted by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 2:25 PM
  • 26 Replies

I saw in another group - Confessions, I think? - a woman's having heart surgery and the BM isn't willing to work with her DH for visitation and is instead saying he just can't get them now. I was talking about the post with my dh and he said he couldn't imagine not making allowances and changing up arrangements in a situation like that, and I know my ex wouldn't have a problem changing them, either.

Are the exes in your lives good about rescheduling visitations for something like that? 

by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 2:25 PM
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Replies (1-10):
whatIknownow
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 2:38 PM

I didn't read the post. The SM is having heart surgery? But isn't it better for the SM if the kids stay with the mother during this period?

anyway to answer your question, yes both the NCPs (my Ex, and my DH's ex) have been good with being flexible around emergencies, in that they'd be willing to take them if they happen to be free. But since they are NCPs, we wouldn't rely on them to take the kids. We would always have a back up plan for child care.

CampHarris
by Gold Member on Apr. 8, 2016 at 2:57 PM

BM... I don't know.  It would depend on how severe the problem was and how much declining would negatively effect us I suppose.  We have never asked her to switch for anything.

And my ex, no.  He lives out of state and rarely takes the kids, so if there's an emergency, we need to find other options than him.

tiafez
by Platinum Member on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:11 PM

I never minded working with scheduling mishaps. 


In the case of the post you mentioned. The kids weren't going to be with Dad anyway, he (I think) was having them stay elsewhere and Mom decided to keep them home. 

Tigress22304
by Ruby Member on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:12 PM
1 mom liked this

my ex isn't an issue in my life

now with DH's ex wife-she is very flexible and reasonable. There were several times my DD had to have surgery on her leg (bone disease) so I wouldn't be home to care for my stepkids when DH had to work-she would keep the kids.

but I read the post you're speaking of-what's sad is the father gave mom several options and basicallly she said "tough shit stick to the CO" which is her right to do.

its a messed up situation for sure

whatIknownow
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:13 PM

well that makes sense.

Wouldn't that be better for Dad and SM anyway?

Quoting tiafez:

I never minded working with scheduling mishaps. 


In the case of the post you mentioned. The kids weren't going to be with Dad anyway, he (I think) was having them stay elsewhere and Mom decided to keep them home. 


whatIknownow
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:14 PM

ok now I have to go read the story.

Quoting Tigress22304:

my ex isn't an issue in my life

now with DH's ex wife-she is very flexible and reasonable. There were several times my DD had to have surgery on her leg (bone disease) so I wouldn't be home to care for my stepkids when DH had to work-she would keep the kids.

but I read the post you're speaking of-what's sad is the father gave mom several options and basicallly she said "tough shit stick to the CO" which is her right to do.

its a messed up situation for sure


luckyinlife
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:20 PM
Ok I read the story. It sounds like it would be a huge problem solver to just let them stay with Mom and either take visitation at the end of summer. Who the hell would want a 6 and 9 year old running around the same week they have open heart surgery? It would be better to heal distraction free and make it up later, IMO.
whatIknownow
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:22 PM

I can't find the story, can you link it or copy it?

Quoting luckyinlife: Ok I read the story. It sounds like it would be a huge problem solver to just let them stay with Mom and either take visitation at the end of summer. Who the hell would want a 6 and 9 year old running around the same week they have open heart surgery? It would be better to heal distraction free and make it up later, IMO.


luckyinlife
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:25 PM
http://mobile.cafemom.com/group/115189/forums/read/21202243/No_sks_this_Summer_updated

Quoting whatIknownow:

I can't find the story, can you link it or copy it?

Quoting luckyinlife: Ok I read the story. It sounds like it would be a huge problem solver to just let them stay with Mom and either take visitation at the end of summer. Who the hell would want a 6 and 9 year old running around the same week they have open heart surgery? It would be better to heal distraction free and make it up later, IMO.

luckyinlife
by on Apr. 8, 2016 at 3:26 PM
Oh and to answer your question I have no help from ODD BF. Fortunately I have a good network of friends who would keep my kids while I healed if I was in this situation or DH would just manage it if he had too.
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