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Stay at Home Mom v Working Mom....

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I personally have been both.  I see the benefits in both.  However, I am strongly against a mom staying at home with her kids if she needs to use State Assistance to do so.  I think that being a stay at home mom is a luxury and not a right.

Looking for opinions on both sides....I am not looking to start a war just interested in the opinions of others.

by on Nov. 22, 2011 at 9:42 AM
Replies (21-26):
kaitybird
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 9:58 PM

I have been both.  I loved working, as I worked in the local school district and I only worked 207 days a year.  Very stressful and not worth it for what I was getting paid, so when the school closed I came back home full time.  I have always been lucky while working.  I have throughly enjoyed being at hime the last few years as when hubby is off and dear daughter is at school we get to spend all that time together.  Yes, after 17 years of marriage it never gets old.  He has unfortunatley been home for the last month & a half due to a torn meniscus.  In January he will be going to post and will only be allowed to come home Friday evenings and then he will have to be back on post by 11am on Sunday for 9 weeks, so getting a job will be out of the question, so will wait until he has graduated and settled in to his new path and then I will go and look at temp agencies, as for me they have offered the greatest flexibility.  :)  

I love making money online and mystery shopping, but that in itself has become a chore and boring for me!  I love being able to help others.  :)

Everyone has to do what makes that family work and happy, this is what works for us.  I am blessed to be able to stay home and be a great mom and great wife....It is what I love!   :)

raynesmommy1
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 10:11 PM

I am a working Mom and it is difficult the hours that I work varies sometimes they need me to 2-7 or to 2,3 in afternoon till 4 in the morning, I may have to work on my days off or by the time I get home she is in bed. It's hard because I feel like I am missing out on so much but staying home is not an option at this point, My Husband works but it is not enough to be a 1 income household. The perks is the money because we can pay the bills but the downside of course is not having enough Family time.

 I have also been a SAHM and though it had it perks it was overshadowed by our piling bills and such that at times it became hard to enjoy being a SAHM when you feel like you should be doing your part to alleviate some of the stress and finding work was becoming impossible. Thank God that I was able to get a job.

IWannaLoveAgain
by on Nov. 26, 2011 at 11:23 PM

i take being a working mom over  being a SAHM. i've been a working mom almost the entire time i've been a mom.. with the exception of when i was 16 weeks pregnant and DS2 thought sitting on my sciatic nerve was a good idea, and i could barely walk.. and 6 months after he was born I watched my nephew and had both my kids with me.. I wanted to rip my hair out. LOL!! i love my kids, and its because i love them that i cant spend every waking moment around them.. i lose my patience and my nerves are short.. i love the time i get with them, and a lot of times i wish i had a little more time to spend with them- but i am jst not ct out to be a SAHM. so i commend all the mommies who are!

Pammi86
by Pamela on Nov. 27, 2011 at 1:01 AM
I work part time, my husband full time. My mother is disabled and can only watch my daughter part time so me working full time would mean I need to pay for daycare and in the long run that actually would cost me more! I work 15 hours minimum a week and its for a after school program and I love it. My husband is a custodian for a local school as well. Now, he gets health insurance and I do not but next year I might get more work hours which would mean insurance. For family insurance it would cost us $936 a month through his work which is more than one of his checks! I looked into insurance for myself and due to my medical problems no one will cover me. So, when I got pregnant and was high risk I did receive medicaid. After my dd was 3 months it ended. I go to clinics and pay based on our income which I'm fine with. In Missouri they have to provide insurance for children so my dd is on Medicaid but next May she will no longer be on it and we will just pay out of pocket for it which again is fine. We DO NOT get food stamps, nor would I accept them bc I make it work! I coupon and take any extra hours I can get at work. Now they do give me WIC bc I was on medicaid while pregnant and its a great help. I no longer receive it but my daughter gets half her formula and baby food paid for this way. My dh and I both work and put into the system so I don't see a problem with this! And its again only until she is 1. I have seen people take advantage of the system which is wrong but I do not do that and we both work hard for what we have and our dd has everything she needs and more! Everyones situation is different so I can't judge! As long as its not being taken advantage of I think its alright. Maybe the mother can't work! Maybe like in my case its not worth it bc they would use it all for daycare! And in that case someone might need the extra help as well! Lastly, I know people say well get a degree but I'm halfway done with my teaching and there's no jobs here! So I was paying out of pocket and so was my dh for school bc we do not want that kind of loan. Right now we can't afford the classes and it seems pointless with how bad the jobs are so we decided to work as much as possible which is exactly what we do. Maybe someday we will finish school and do better. Do we have a savings? Not really and who really can right now! We aren't rock bottom but we aren't great either. You make the best of your situation and we do fine!
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blessedfamily06
by on Nov. 28, 2011 at 7:32 AM


Quoting goddess99:

I've done both. I'm a SAHM now and have NO plans to go back to work.

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Cubanmom84
by on Nov. 28, 2011 at 8:39 AM

Ok, I have been both, until my son was diagnosed with Autism/ADHD and is non verbal. I decided to stay at home, because many daycares can't handle him, not even the YMCA who told me that they weren't "equiped" to care for my child. So I had no other choice, and I also receive assistance, and am applying for SSDB for my son. 

And just for fyi, i do not plan to have any more kids until i start working and have a stedy income because I do not want to abuse the system.

For some parents, there is no other choice.

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