My sister treats my oldest ds as her own... but not in a good way. :(
I am just beside myself. My family celebrated Christmas together back home in KS yesterday. My oldest sister (I'm the baby of 3 girls) has 2 boys ages 16 and 18 (her 18 yo is living with my mom). We lost our dad in June, and she took my son to go to the funeral home to see his body without my permission. I was led to believe that they were going to the flower shop. I felt this was a time for my kids to be with me. This was the first death any of my kids have experienced that they were old enough to understand. I was absolutely infuriated. Each of our families were supposed to go up separately so we could have our own quiet personal moments. Needless to say, there were MAJOR issues when I found out where they had gone.
Yesterday, she went over the top. My sister is rather liberal, the complete opposite of the rest of the family. We just don't see eye to eye on raising kids. When she showed up at our Mom's house, she brought in a bottle of chocolate vodka and announced that it was for the adults and HER boys. :O REALLY??? Okay, fine, they're you're boys and I have no say in what you allow your kids to do. BUT, when I went into the living room to check on the younger kids, she gave my oldest ds a drink of it!!!! I didn't know about it until about 10 minutes later when she told me she gave him a drink. I came UNGLUED on her. I reminded her that my kids are my kids and she needs to ask me before doing things like that. Then I asked her why she never does inappropriate things with our sister's kids (also ages 16 and 18... she also has a 22 year old who's in Afghanistan), and she wouldn't answer me. I have a ZERO tolerance for MY kids drinking underage. My ds got grounded right in front of her for making a bad decision. We have had talks about alcohol and drugs, and he knew where I stood. Since it was his aunt giving it to him, and I was in the house, he thought I would be okay with it. When I grounded him, I told him how disappointed in him I was, and that I don't know how I'm going to be able to trust him. If he's going to take a drink of alcohol while I'm in the same house; what is he going to do if he's at a friend's house when I'm not around?
It just breaks my heart knowing that my son, at age 15, has already had his first drink of alcohol. :( Luckily, he didn't get mad when I grounded him. He apologized and admitted that he had made a bad decision.
I'm divorced mommy of three and there are no "baby daddies". I'm a staunch right wing republican and a professional cosmetologist (hair, nails, makeup etc) working my tail off to make my own way in this world. I breastfed my kids and rewarded myself with a boob job to put back what the breastfeeding fairy took away. I believe in tough love, rules, boundaries, discipline and follow through. My kids do not rule the roost. They say yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes please and no thank you. Because of the values and respect that I've taught them, other people don't mind being around them. I spanked my kids just like my mom spanked me and we've all turned out fine. We're a hard playin', fun lovin' family. This is me, take it or leave it.