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I need some Help !!!! :(

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 When I was 17, I began dating someone in a different state.. We online dated and being young & naive for about 2 years. During that time, I was depressed & had just lost my dog who I had for 8 years, she was my only friend during my depression due to my close, close relative passing away and also, some stuff that happened in school. I felt like I had no more friends so I stayed home and talked to this guy all the time, he was the only thing that made me feel better about my depression but things had changed after my dog, and grandpa passing..

He became more & more distant, he was cheating on me behind my back and talking to his ex. I was so depressed that I felt like I NEEDED him to save my life and he was pulling away, it was breaking my heart and it litterally has made me suffer to this day of all that heartbreak that I once had. Now, I'm 23 and I have a boyfriend and I'm having anxiety about his ex now, like.. I know nothing would happen but its caused me to feel like he is going to leave me for his ex and sometimes it causes us to fight.. I dont know how to get over that feeling of being 'not good enough', or unhappy. Its hard to explain because I fear that the heartbreak from when I was 17 & depressed is going to come back up and I will feel that heartbreak once again.. I'm an adult now, I know but it drives me crazy and my bf crazy. I am 3months pregnant and I have not eaten today, I am mentally exhausted from MY own fault of having this anxiety. Its hard to explain. I wish I could explain it better then this but I can't.. I need help to get over that and I was hoping for some suggestions on how to do that?! I need it.. I need help!!

XCANDI&TRISTYNX

by on Feb. 25, 2012 at 12:53 AM
Replies (11-13):
BeckyTerrill
by on Feb. 26, 2012 at 9:05 AM
Ok...I kind of had the same issues. I won't dive too much into details but I always worried about the ex and other women in general. I worried about A LOT of stuff to the point I was having panic attacks, I was depressed, I gained a ton of weight and sometimes I didn't care what happened to me...I made a few mistakes along the way, but I did talk to me doctor and was on medicine for a while. It helps but then I made the decision that this was MY life and you only get one chance. I stopped thinking so much about what other people were doing or thinking and started thinking how to live life for ME and be happy. The truth is that even if something would've happened and we wouldn't have stayed together because of ANY reason, there's somebody else out there that will love me for who I am, and that goes for you too. Talking to your BF about your feelings is the best way to deal with your anxieties. You both have to be completely open and honest with each other. Sometimes I still feel insecure like I'm not good enough, not pretty enough and I sure as heck don't have the perfect body, but then I just tell myself that no matter what happens I'll deal with it and it'll be ok. It's a mindset. I believe you become a mother the minute you get pregnant. You're a mother now and you will have the unconditional love of your child and you have a great responsibility to care for your child. You can do it. Take care of yourself and talk to your BF, your doctor and maybe even see a counselor. It all helps. Message me if you want to talk!
CandieGirl09
by on Feb. 27, 2012 at 12:12 AM

I love your answer. It really shows me that I'm not the only one whose gone threw this and that I can overcome it. I actually started writing my bf Love letters when I feel anxiety and he is thrilled to read them when he gets home. I talked to him about it and he is not going to let it break us up, he's told me that he wants to stick with me for life and this will be something that we will overcome too. He loves the letters and it makes me feel way better when I write them instead of trying to explain myself. I am going to talk to my doctor as I am pregnant and I havent yet gotten over my grandma* passing or my dog.. I also just lost my grandpa who I was really close too on new years and a few friends too.. I lost alot of people, thats why it makes me feel like I'm going to lose him too.. but he was with me threw the whole funneral of my grandpa, everything! Thanks for your advice, I am going to tape it to my forehead everytime I feel worthless, useless and not appreciated cuz I am most definately appreciated, loved and I have found someone who has showed me how I should be treated, not someone somebody could come around and abuse. <3 Thanks a alot 

XCANDI&TRISTYNX

Janet
by Ruby Member on Feb. 27, 2012 at 9:10 AM

 It looks like you got great advice hun. Please take it. Not eating is dangerous for the baby.

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