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*sigh* How do I handle this?

Posted by on May. 3, 2012 at 12:28 AM
  • 16 Replies

Well, my 4yo dd's in trouble. Again. This time, she decided it would be a good idea to sneak into my BIL's room and steal half of his girlfriend's candy. When he asked her, she lied to him and told him no, she didn't do it. When I asked her, she copped to it. So I asked her why she did it. She said that she thought it was fun. My BIL and I asked her if she thought that hurting people and making them sad and angry was fun too. She said no, and we explained to her that by stealing from them, she had hurt them, and that she had hurt me because I have taught her not to steal. She's grounded now from everything except reading for the next week, but I don't know that she really understands why what she did was so bad. How do I get through to this child???


*On a side note, my older three were easy on this matter. The first time they got popped on the butt or grounded, they stopped. My 4yo, though, doesn't seem to get it. I hate that she did this, and honestly, it makes me want to cry. 

toddler girlblowing bubbleslistening to tunesteen girlbaseball

There's not enough coffee in the world to gain as much energy as these 5!


by on May. 3, 2012 at 12:28 AM
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Replies (1-10):
pebbles98
by on May. 3, 2012 at 1:08 AM
4 moms liked this

Bless your heart. This might be a good way to start teaching her the value of a dollar. What about adding up the $ amount of the candy she stole then making her work it off? When she's done explain to her, it's hard to earn money to buy things, even candy and that's why your BIL and you were upset for her stealing. Its hurtful to have someone take what you worked and earned. 

Good luck.

OliviasMommy611
by on May. 3, 2012 at 6:47 AM
Idk.. I'm sorry. Never dealt with this.
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Janet
by Ruby Member on May. 3, 2012 at 8:23 AM

 I have a 6 year old DGS that sneaks in my stuff and won't stop.

goddess99
by Michelle on May. 3, 2012 at 11:28 AM

As she gets older she'll understand.

snuggiewoogie
by on May. 3, 2012 at 11:30 AM

 Ugh! Hope it gets better!

MusherMaggie
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 11:40 AM

This--she may have the beginning of a behavioral disorder that will need to be worked on from now on, and it's much better to start early.  See if your local library has some material on this, and on tings you can read to your daughter on good & bad behavior.  Though she's only four, she sounds very intelligent and will require more attention being paid to her behavior to guide it in the proper direction.

Quoting pebbles98:

Bless your heart. This might be a good way to start teaching her the value of a dollar. What about adding up the $ amount of the candy she stole then making her work it off? When she's done explain to her, it's hard to earn money to buy things, even candy and that's why your BIL and you were upset for her stealing. Its hurtful to have someone take what you worked and earned. 

Good luck.


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thanush
by on May. 3, 2012 at 4:45 PM
1 mom liked this
With my 2 yr old, I tell her it's ( the other person's ) books, etc. she hasn't stolen anything, but I tell her that when she ask for toys of other kids, or things that I do not want to give her. ( she get it, in fact she would sadly say 'its mommy's earrings', but do not take them... Melts my heart, but I like the fact that she gets the idea of 'not hers, so shouldn't take it')
At age 4 I think your DD did not think of it as stealing. Tell her it's not hers and she should not take what's not hers. Don't treat her as a 'thief'. That was not her intention. But let her know that taking thins without asking is very bad and not OK.
thanush
by on May. 3, 2012 at 4:54 PM
I was like that with my moms stuff. I never took anything, but I LOVED going through the armoire every single day! I think i did it until I was about 9 or so. It drove my mom crazy. Lol That was 20 yrs ago, I just hope my little girl wouldn't do it to me.
Quoting Janet:

 I have a 6 year old DGS that sneaks in my stuff and won't stop.

RighteousLove
by on May. 3, 2012 at 10:05 PM

always good to start teaching them. it is just candy, not a serious matter, but then this could be a good starting point for right and wrong. but we all relate; we have two little ones only a year apart. one is a year and 6 months and the other is 5 months.

Pammi86
by Pamela on May. 3, 2012 at 11:51 PM

I think its going to take time. I feel she is still too young to really grasp it and she stole candy not money or something! She is being a kid and unfortunatley its going to take her growing more to fully get it.

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