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Mother in law - can I get a reality check please?

Posted by on May. 19, 2012 at 11:12 PM
  • 30 Replies

Ok, she did it again.  My husband, daughter and I have birthdays during the same time frame.  My mother in law sends them checks for one amount and then sends me a check for half as much.  Trust me, it ain't about the money.  I get the feelling she wants me to feel like a second class citizen.  Same thing at Christmas.  These should be great times but it is always a let down.  The rest of the family just goes along with it.  It sucks. what do  you guys think?

by on May. 19, 2012 at 11:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Charliesmommy11
by on May. 19, 2012 at 11:18 PM
I know how you feel. Except in my situation its they way my fil girlfriend treats our son. She wants us to include her in his life and that's fine with us she's been an amazing support through prayer and what not but she scoffs at anything we do that's not fancy enough for her taste so for his first birthday she got him a card and nothing else because " she wasn't sure if we has the money to spend on expensive gifts and didn't want to look gaudy "

Bleghh family issues
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mom2gr8tgirls
by on May. 20, 2012 at 1:09 PM

Dang...what a you-know-what.  Have you talked to her about how you feel?  Or asked what you did to be treated like this?  

Momammia
by on May. 20, 2012 at 3:11 PM

Unfortunately, she doesn't respond well to that kind of conversation.

snuggiewoogie
by on May. 20, 2012 at 3:15 PM

 I would not let it bug me! Less money is still money you did not have to begin with so I would just take it and smile........ Karma comes back on people when they do crap like that!

Momammia
by on May. 20, 2012 at 3:28 PM

Thanks.  I try to get past it... every birthday.....every christmas.

Cutios3
by on May. 20, 2012 at 3:31 PM

I'm not much help.  My family does the same thing.  For birthday's and X-mas in my family my parents give their children $150, daughter/son-in-laws $75, and grandkids $50.  The one thing that is different is I know my husband doesn't feel second class.  He thinks my parents are great and my parents adore my husband.   The gift distribution is just what my parents have always done.  We haven't thought anything about it.  

I don't know how my BIL or SIL feels.

kaitybird
by on May. 20, 2012 at 5:00 PM

I totally know how you feel.  At least you get something....My husband and daughter get money from his parents and I always get nothing.  Our daughter asked one day about it.  

Anymore we just usually will send it back that way they cannot come back and say that they give us money all the time and have something to hold over our heads.  It is a LONG story, but we don't talk to them and we haven't seen them in 11 years.  They have never once taken the time to come and see us ever they always go and spend time with their other son and do vacations with him and his family.  I know where I stand with them and that is okay.  

DixieL
by Bronze Member on May. 20, 2012 at 5:09 PM

I know how you feel, mine was the same Don't let it get you down. You can't make her treat you the same. Your husband should talk to her and let her know that is isn't right. Also know that it hurts your feelings. Talk to him and let him know how you feel

goddess99
by Michelle on May. 20, 2012 at 6:16 PM

I wouldn't let it bother me. I'll be the same way for sure. When it comes to my dd I go all out but no way in hell will I do that for her husband. He will be her responsibility, not mine. I'm sure she feels the same way. Blood family in her eyes trumps married into family.

Momammia
by on May. 20, 2012 at 9:11 PM

Thank you all so much! It is great to have feedback

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