Okay I'd really like some opinions here. Heres the situation. My husband(deputy)has been at this new job for 10 months.... there is a new dispatcher on his shift that he has become friends with. They dont physically see each other but the amount of texting is insane allbeit some work related. I found out that they had been talking on the phone for at most 3 hours at the end of shift cuz its dead at 3 in the morning last month. I dont feel that they should be that close. So I texted her and said, hey why are you talking to my husband for hours at a time? should I know something?.... she texted him and said your wife just texted me and i realize that its inappropriate and it wont happen again. Kudos to her yay or so i though.... i sent him a text saying I didnt have a problem with the friendship and he took that as they can talk on phone and text through out the day every day not just the 4 days they work. So the last phone bill had even more phone conversations and they were 46 mins or less..... its usually while he drives home at the end of the shift. Okay so am I nuts for having a problem with this. Shouldnt she have said no I wont talk to you on phone your wife sounded upset. He comes home to me but how close is too close????? and for the record we live 45 mins away from his work so no I have never met her. He said he likes talking to her and getting to know her. sounds like a girlfriend to me but im crazy(or so i have been told by DH)
UPDATE: Okay so we talked it out even more and he has said he would send her a text tomorrow or maybe thursday when they work together again and say hey why dont you and your son meet us for dinner next week. And then he said he would gage her response.... if shes excited to meet me I would say things will be okay and if she says no or blows it off then I told him that thats his own personal red flag that shes into him more than hes into her and to limit contact.
Second Update: So he told her yesterday that he was cutting contact with her and would only talk to her through police band. He kinda pouted since her doesnt have anyone to talk to anymore while bored at work but I told him I appreciated him doing that even though I was giving her 2 weeks to set something up. I am going to try to get counseling so Im not so reactive and hopefully he will too eventually. He really has no self esteem and has some family issues that he needs to work out. That have hardly anything to do with this issue. He also said he screwed up really bad with how he handled the whole thing and apologized. Thank you everyone I read every post and even some ;) to him. Great to know there is this kinda support here.