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Should 19yo daughter have a bedroom or not?

Posted by on Jul. 16, 2012 at 1:31 PM
  • 35 Replies
I have a daughter that will be 20 in a couple of months from a previous marriage. Right now she is living in another state wih family. My husbands job moved us away from our hometown and all of our family a few years ago. When we first made the move my daughter came with us because she had 1 more year of high school. She graduated and moved back home and is in college. She has her own bedroom here but we also use it as a guest bedroom when any family comes to visit.
We may be moving again soon ( because of husbands job) and I plan on looking for a 4 bdrm house. I think she should still have a bedroom in our house even though she doesn't live with me. I also have a 1 yr old and 2 yr old. Not sure how dh will react to that and trying to get some advice ahead of time.
Also, her father bought a new house a few years ago for him and his wife and stepkids and doesnt have a bedroom for her. She was pretty hurt by that even though she does not have a good relationship with him AND considers my husband more of a dad to her than her real dad!
So am I wrong to expect my husband to buy a house with enough bedrooms to include my daughter?
by on Jul. 16, 2012 at 1:31 PM
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Replies (1-10):
goddess99
by Michelle on Jul. 16, 2012 at 1:56 PM
5 moms liked this

Since you have 2 other kids I would look for a 4 bedroom as well. The extra would just be a guest room, whether your dd used it or others. I guess I wouldn't do it up like a girls room, Just a neutral color spare bedroom.

Shani527
by Member on Jul. 16, 2012 at 2:10 PM
1 mom liked this

I would get the extra room, but not really brand it a room for your daughter.

MistressMinerva
by Jennifer on Jul. 16, 2012 at 3:03 PM

I would get the extra bedroom.

mom2gr8tgirls
by Gold Member on Jul. 16, 2012 at 3:05 PM
1 mom liked this
I would get the extra rom and fo what you're doing now. It's her room when she's there and the guest bedroom when she's not.
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MAMABISKITZ
by on Jul. 16, 2012 at 5:32 PM
1 mom liked this

I BELIEVE SINCE YOU HAVE ALREADY SEEN HOW UPSET SHE WAS BY NOT HAVING A ROOM AT HER FATHER HOUSE THAT SHE SHOULD HAVE A ROOM AT YOURS. IT DOESNT NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE JUST HER ROON BUT A ROOM THAT SHE CAN USE WHEN SHE IS IN TOWN. IT WILL LET HER KNOW THAT YOU STILL CARE AND THAT SHE STILL MATTERS EVEN THOUGH SHE IS GROWING UP AND LIVING ON HER OWN.

 

GOOD LUCK ;-)

CampClan
by Member on Jul. 16, 2012 at 7:50 PM

Did your husband help raise your DD? Just asking because you mentioned she thinks of him more like a father than her own father. I think if your DH thinks of her as a DD then it would not be something to worry about.

My ex is not the father of my oldest & he is looking for a house that will be big enough for our 4 plus my DS & his DS from his affair (That is 6 kids total). IDK how he is gonna do it but that is not my concern. I know that my DS would be crushed if my ex didn't include him.

OliviasMommy611
by on Jul. 16, 2012 at 8:27 PM
Yes, I would get the extra.
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ashmiller101
by on Jul. 16, 2012 at 8:41 PM

I would be sure to get an extra room!! Because you want a room for when you have a house full or family or you dd home!!

Coopersmom909
by on Jul. 16, 2012 at 9:41 PM
Quoting MAMABISKITZ:

I BELIEVE SINCE YOU HAVE ALREADY SEEN HOW UPSET SHE WAS BY NOT HAVING A ROOM AT HER FATHER HOUSE THAT SHE SHOULD HAVE A ROOM AT YOURS. IT DOESNT NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE JUST HER ROON BUT A ROOM THAT SHE CAN USE WHEN SHE IS IN TOWN. IT WILL LET HER KNOW THAT YOU STILL CARE AND THAT SHE STILL MATTERS EVEN THOUGH SHE IS GROWING UP AND LIVING ON HER OWN.


 


GOOD LUCK ;-)



My thoughts exactly! Thanks!
smile357
by on Jul. 17, 2012 at 9:06 AM

I would definately get the extra room and label it as her's. If people come and stay they can stay in her room. She's doing things in her life which are responsible and deserves to have somewhere to call a home.

As for her bio father, that's something she needs to work on herself since they don't have a good relationship. (I had the same issue with my daughter) Since you said she considers your husband more of a dad that he should also understand that this is what should be done.

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