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concerned stepmom just turned 17 yearold new job how much independence do we give without looking like we are bad . god hate the title

Posted by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 3:23 AM
  • 15 Replies

help me how do I do this . Im a stay at home mom at the moment  but my step son just got two job sand is working two jobs 8 hours a day  and still cant think or take devil miniresponsibility for himself and hates me for being concerned when i dont here from him an hour after work he says he has rides but come to find out no he has a key to a friends house  I worry

by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 3:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MommyCordova123
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 3:31 AM

hes a good kid but I have concernes I catch him in fibbs alot on the other hand dad thinks hes good kid i catch him .funny game we have to play I have better things to do like take care of a 10 month old but I i worry for him

MommyCordova123
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 3:40 AM

how do I take my kids away from the same caos I was in, my 10 yearold daughter needs help and i cant help her cause it might make it worse, all I can do is let her intrust that I wont say a thing it kills me shes my everything and lives with him cause I had no help when he hurt me shes happy here with me but tries to still make her dad feel like he is more

MommyCordova123
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 3:42 AM

I have to much to tell ,its late dont forget me please help

mummy1990
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 3:44 AM
3 moms liked this

I have no idea what you are trying to ask. Punctuation, proper sentence forming, and some spellcheck is desperately needed.

TIPTONTNSAHM
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 6:22 AM

What I don't understand what you are saying? Your son is 17 or your 17 yrs old? If your ex works two jobs and he is leaving your guys daughter with you. I still don't get the whole picture of what is going on?

TIPTONTNSAHM
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 6:24 AM

ok, your step son has two jobs but how is he not taking responsibility for himself?

mom2gr8tgirls
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 8:24 AM
Yeah, I'm a little confused as well...
DixieFlower
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 10:05 AM

I think this is what MommyCordova is saying.

The first issue is with her stepson. He's 17 yrs old and has two jobs. He isn't being very responsible. She gets concerned when he hasn't heard from him an hour after work and he gets upset when she's concerned. He says he has a ride from work, however she's found out that he doesn't have a ride, that he has a key to a friend's house. She says he's a good kid but she has concerns since she has caught him lying often. His dad on the other hand things he's a good kid. She's saying that she's got better things to do than worrying about the stepson. Such as tending to her 10 month old. 

The second issue is that her 10 yr old daughter needs help. She says she can't help her because it will make it worse. That all she can do is let her daughter trust that she won't say a thing. It kills MommyC. because her daughter is her everything and lives with her ex husband. She says that her daughter lives with her ex because she didn't have any help when he hurt MommyC. She says that her daughter is happy when she's with her but still tries to make her dad feel like she likes him more.


Now this is just my translation and might be wrong.

DixieFlower
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 10:09 AM

Now my response. As to the 17 yr old. I would talk with his father and see what he says. Personally I would tell him either he starts being more responsible or he doesn't work. That includes being courteous and letting me know that he's not coming straight home after work. However, since he's not my child I would discuss it with his father and see what we should do. If his father says do nothing well then it's not my responsibility at that point.

As to the daughter I'd need more information. What are you not saying a thing about? Why does your daughter feel like she can't let her dad know she likes being with you?

CayShek
by on Jul. 21, 2012 at 11:50 AM

 I understand that you are concerned about your stepson but it shoulds to me like your opinion doesn't really matter to him. Is he just working 2 jobs for the summer until he goes back to school in August or did he drop out?? I agree he should be home more. Maybe you & DH should start scheduling some family time. I'm not saying that him working 16 hours a day is right...but I remember in high school there were many times when I would leave for school at 730am & not get home until after 9 because of after school activities & work. However, he NEEDS to spend SOME time at home. Too much can happen when teens take it upon themselves to run the roads & make their own schedules. I don't know what you can say to DH to make him see this that is why I suggest asking him if you can start doing like a family night everyonce in awhile. I hope this helps :)

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