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am I blowing this out of proportion? Eta!

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Dh thinks I am blowing this out of proportion. Yesterday I got a facebook message from my future sister-in-law that's states her son's 5th birthday is this Friday and they want to do something for his birthday on Friday. I make sure Friday is open. Tonight I get another text from her stating they switched his party to Thursday night instead of Friday. She'll be sending out invites tomorrow with the finalized details of where and when. Thrusday night my 5 year old son has piano lessons from 5:30pm to 6:15pm. Not to mention they need time to do homeowrk, take their showers, eat dinner and their bedtime is 8pm because they have school earlier the next morning. I was already ticked off because dh sprung on me last minute that he had to work late tomorrow night when he's known for 2 weeks that tomorrow night was back to school parent teacher confreneces at our boys school. I couldn't find anyone to baby sit so it looks like I will be cancelling them. We were supposed to go out of town this weekend on a float trip but dh just sprung on me last night that he has to work out of town that weekend. Looks like we won't be going now. I am ticked off that people can't stick to the plan. Ticked off that my plans keep getting pushed to the side. Ugh! Am I blowing this situation out of proportion?

My mom called me and and asked if I got the info on the party. I said yes and we both agreed that what she did was like, "wtf!" She tried to tell my mom that she really wanted to have her son's party the weekend of his birthday, but his birthday falls on labor day. My brother doesn't get his kids for labor day weekend. They would have done it the following weekend but she didn't have her son for that weekend. The weekend after that she said the were going to plan it for that weekend when they had all the kids but I took that weekend for my son's 2nd birthday (I sent out invites a week ago). Mom asked her why she didn't have it this past weekend and she said they didn't know then whether or not her work would let them use the clubhouse for the party. Mom told her they could have had a little get together at their house or my mom's house, but my sister in law said it wouldn't have been fair since they threw my brother's son 4th birthday party at the clubhouse last month. She said he deserves nothing less. Mom then informed her that she wouldn't be able to stay long because it was a school night. Megan (my aunt 14) doesn't get out of pom practice until 5:30pm, Julia (my niece 11) has drama club after school so she informed her she won't be able to make it there at 6pm that'd it have to be more like 6:30pm. Mom also told her that my son has piano lessons at 5:30 to 6:15pm. That if we showed up it'd be more like 6:30pm. Mom said she sounded very annoyed. She feels that we are all not making time for her son's party because he isn't a biological grandchild. That's what my brother said. What a crock!
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by on Aug. 27, 2012 at 10:36 PM
Replies (11-20):
by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 10:55 AM
No you aren't. It is terribly aggravating when this happens. In this situation though, I would follow through with your plans with your kids. I do alot of things last minute, but have also been in your position and with the beginning of school it gets crazy enough let alone when something like this happens. If your children are good with keeping their schedule, then by all means, keep your plans. If by some chance the birthday is close by and you have the chance and time allows to stop in for a short time, then by all means do so, if it isn't going to turn Friday morning into a dissaster. Good luck.
by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 11:02 AM
I know it doesn't sound like much, but your husband probably though he was doing you a favor by taking you son to karate after putting in a long day. Maybe on those nights, you should ask him to stay with the others while you take him to practice. It will give you a much needed break, even if you do spend that time wondering if he's managing ok with the others. :)
by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 12:45 PM

 Nope, not blowing it out of proportion at all IMO.

I totally understand schedules and routines.


by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 1:02 PM

Nope, I would be frustrated too! It is hard being a mama and dealing with it all!

by Member on Aug. 28, 2012 at 1:07 PM

i would be annoyed to but i would go and for a bit and leave

by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2012 at 3:07 PM

Throwing ANY party mid-week is a bad call and poor planning on her part.  She can't be offended when more than half her guests won't even be able to show up, or come late, or leave early.  

Make it clear to her it has absolutely NOTHING to do with the family or blood ties ... but schedulign and planning.  You did make sure to keep Friday clear in the first place because Friday is a more 'party type; day than Thursday anyway.  

She needs to calm down and if she's convincing your brother that his family doesn't love or care for her son, he needs to be part of the conversation as well.  Silly.  

by Michelle on Aug. 28, 2012 at 3:20 PM

Sometimes you just have to miss things. It's not a big deal to me. Everyone has a life and commitments.

by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 4:32 PM

Sounds to me like a 2 year old is in charge of your family. Parents are supposed to be in charge. If your husband needs his tools that is inconvenient. But he's a grown up that should be mature enough to be prepared for work. Certainly take the tools when it works for you. But you need to stick up for yourself and enforce your schedule. Anyone that waits until the last minute to send an invite and then changes it around is a flake and should be understanding of your time constraints.

by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 4:46 PM

Isn't this like 2 days notice?  She is being ridiculous!

by on Aug. 28, 2012 at 6:18 PM

I would go, though.  No need to punish your kids.  Plans always spring up like that, this is life, deal with it :)

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