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My DS is now 7 and some of his friends/classmates tell him Santa/ toothfairy isn't real(he just started loosing he teeth last year). Now this makes me mad cause I feel he should enjoy childhood and believe in all the fun stuff still while he can.I understand not everyone is blessed enough to have a good Christmas and my son knows that too so we count all of our blessings and on his Christmas list to Santa he has to help out one person that he knows. We sat down and I told him its just like the movies we watch as long as you really believe then Santa/toothfairy is real and just to tell the kids we believe in our house then stop talking about it. Now here is my question at what age do you think kids should really learn the truth? I was thinking 10 then we would just continue the part of helping out someone in need.
by on Nov. 11, 2012 at 3:22 PM
Replies (11-20):
DivaPrinciple
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 1:36 AM
2 moms liked this

I've never told my kids any of them were real. I am a strong believer in not lying to my kids...

I will always ask parents..."Why get mad at your kids for lying when you lie about Santa, Tooth Fairies, Egg laying Bunnies, etc.."..Their going to find out anyway. So, its just best to not start the lie in the first place...And 7 years old is about that age when they start finding out. 


Now, Yes, I will allow them to watch the movies, shows, etc...But when it comes down to it...When we did celebrate Christmas, they always knew that Mama bought the gifts. My son's dad got upset when they told them Santa wasnt real and he tried to convince them he was...Mind you, my oldest son was 12-13 by this time....and my other son was about 6-7 y/o...But, when they told me about it, they just said they believed me and not him...I NEVER lied to my kids about it...I was just too uncomfortable with it...Now, they liked to see Santa and the Easter Bunny in the malls...And they would get excited and happy, and I would always say "Santa's Helpers" and explained to them that Santa's Helpers are people who go out and do for those who cant do for themselves...There's always a way to get around them finding out...I talked to my kids as they got older and told them that St. Nick supposedly existed and helped the less fortunate but he has long since been gone....But the mythological man they talk about, doesn't exist. 


Bookoholic
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 1:53 AM
2 moms liked this
Even at 24 I believe in Santa, reason for this is the spine chilly good story my mom told me. Last year we talked about Santa because of Ds, well, my mom told me this. When I was about a year and half old the Barbie dream house came out so around 89. That's all my sister wanted for Christmas. My mom figured since my sister had been such a great little girl she would get it for her, me being in the hospital my mom was almost never home after my dad got off work. About six weeks before Christmas my mom called every store within a 5hour raidis of our house no one had it. Day before Christmas eve there was a knock on the door, my mom answered it; it was the UPS guy. The guy asked for my sisters signature, my mom corrected the guy but nope HAD to be my sisters. So after she signed and it was in the living room, my sister told my mom that it was the Barbie dream house, my mom said H you don't know that, my sister said yes I do its my Barbie dream house, can I open it. My mom checked the whole wrapping paper with no return address then told my sister she could untapped it. My mom was curious too, it was the Barbie dream house. No return address just a label that said To Miss H****** B*****.
So know after all these years I believe, my mom wanted to call who ever it was to repay them thank them whatever but she still hasn't been able. Even 25 years later.
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outstandingLove
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 2:03 AM
1 mom liked this

My kids know the truth from the start. I don't like lying to them.

What we tell them is that all of those characters are part of a story and a lot of kids and families like to pretend that they are real. And then they get to decide if they want to pretend too. It's worked out well for us that way. I've also told them that some kids truly believe those characters are real, and that they should not try to tell them that they are not.

mummy1990
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 2:06 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't plan on telling my kids lies.

ReachtotheStars
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 2:06 AM
Idk we dont do santa or the tooth fairy, but our children are told that others believe. Just like God/ Jesus. We teach them that some believe and unless they ask dont volunteer what you believe.
ReachtotheStars
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 2:09 AM
Quoting outstandingLove:

My kids know the truth from the start. I don't like lying to them.

What we tell them is that all of those characters are part of a story and a lot of kids and families like to pretend that they are real. And then they get to decide if they want to pretend too. It's worked out well for us that way. I've also told them that some kids truly believe those characters are real, and that they should not try to tell them that they are not.




This

My husband was very hurt that his mom lied to him, but prior to learning she lied he started a fist fight at school over it because his mom would never lie and the other child was being mean saying his mom lied.
TigressLily
by Member on Nov. 12, 2012 at 2:10 AM

I was 11 when I discovered on my own that Santa wasn't real. I crawled into my mom's lap and asked her through tears why she had lied to me all my life. I will not lie to my daughter... I think the earlier they learn it the better tbh if you are one that does Santa etc., if someone tells them the "truth," and then they are lied to yet again saying to not listen to them because they're lying.... well that isn't a good idea idt. I don't see how it would be robbing a kid of their childhood to be lied to, my nephew {my mom and I raised him for the first 4 years of his life} knew that santa wasn't real anymore, but he knew the real story of him and how it got started etc., and he knew that the gifts he got came from the people he knew and loved. That's how I'll be raising my daughter. No I am not bashing anyone that does the Santa thing nor anything else, I am just explaining why I feel the earlier they learn it the better. I was 11 and didn't know if I could trust my mom for a while after that since she'd lied to me my whole life. So I'm not doing it to my children.



Greekmama21
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 5:36 AM

Honestly, I quit believing when I was three almost four, my sister was five. My husband was five... Seven IS getting to be a bit old and I think it's a joke to lie to them when they question. 

romalove
by Member on Nov. 12, 2012 at 6:53 AM

 For me this was simple.  We did Santa Claus and when the kids asked if there really was Santa, I would say "well, what do you think" and if they said "I think he's real" I would say that's a fine thing to think, and if they said "I think you and Daddy give us the presents" I would say that's right, but Santa is a fun thing for people to believe in, so don't spoil the fun for others. 

I have a friend who believed until the 4th grade, and she was talking with other kids who were laughing at her that she still believed, and in the same conversation was told not only that there was no Santa but no Easter Bunny and no tooth fairy.  She lost everything in about five minutes.  She's 50 now and still remembers how crushing that was.

birthymom4
by on Nov. 12, 2012 at 6:55 AM
My almost 5 year old figured it out for herself. She asked for a toy at JCpenny, I told her to put it on her list for Santa.
She said "Mommy, I know Santa isn't really. YOU buy us the presents."

If they have a clue that it's not real and you push believing it goes from special fun to a lie. We explained that Santa represents giving and being selfless, and that was an answer she was ok with.
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