He is in a toxic relationship and he doesn't realize it. He doesn't see it. He has been with a girl for about 5 months now and she is changing him for the worse. I respect his feelings for her and her kids, but this isn't going to end well. He has had 3 different jobs since ngetting with her and we have paid his phone bill 3 times since they got together (4 if you count the one we are going to end up paying this month), and he doesn't care. He is on our cell plan and has his phone and mobile broadband usb modem. The billing cycle ends today and he gets a monthly allowance of 5gb on the modem. Just since this morning he has used 6.5gb OVER his monthly allowance. That adds $70 to the bill, that he probably wont pay for. Its like he thinks that if he ignores the bill and refuses to acknowledge it, that it doesn't exist. It does for us. The bill is in MY name. He is fucking us over more than I think he realizes it. Dh doesn't want to text him because his gf will hijack his phone like she always does and answer it, or see it before him and reply to dh from her phone. Dh tried calling him, and he didn't answer. I looked at facebook, and he is online, incurring more overage charges that he doesn't care that we nhave to pay for. We barely scrape by as it is, and we will be a family of 4 in july. I found out we are expecting number 2 a couple days ago, and haven't told dh yet, because of this bullshit with his brother. I know he will be happy since we've been trying for 6 months or so, but I don't want to add to the stress he is under. I tried suspending service on bils 2 lines, but until the account is current (this months bill is paid, which after other bil paid his bill on time today is $294 because of the first bil), and its going to be a couple weeks before its paid. So were still going to have an outrageous bill by the time it gets shut off. I feel terrible. Dh said bil and his gf/kids aren't welcome here anymore. They have burned a very helpful and supportive bridge. If bil didn't live 90mins away we would just go there and get the phone. I texted bil last night to see if he would be ontime (at least somewhat) with his bill this month and he says "I just paid $100 on it. I fail to see why I still owe this month". I told him that what he just paid was for the bill that was due in october, and he still has to pay novembers bill. Then he brings up how he borrowed dh $400 like a year and a half ago. I told him a couple months ago (the last time he couldn't/wouldn't pay his bill) that since we paid his phone bill 3 times since may (an average of $130 each time) and dh put $150 into his bank account, that it was more than paid back. When I retold him that he gets all text message pissy pants with me and says he will drop off the phone/modem this weekend since he is sick of paying for it and sick of me hounding him to pay it. Then a couple minutes later he textx again and says he will mail it since he shouldnt have to waste gas on this bullshit either.
how does he nit see what he is doing? How does it not occure to him that he is hurting his family?
I was able to get his phone shut off yesterday with the mobile verizon app. I talked to cust srvc this morning and got his modem shut off.
And I told dh that im pregnant. He is thrilled. I told him I was a little nervous of telling him and adding stress to the bil situation. he says he is happy our family is growing, and his brother has nothing to do with "our" happiness. It really was a load off. Lol
on Nov. 15, 2012 at 11:51 PM