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Do you let your children choose?

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I took my son to get his haircut about a week ago. I let him pick what he wanted from the books they had there. It's nothing too wild or out there. So I was shocked when my mom asked me why I let them do that to his hair. Then when I told her I let him pick how he wanted her hair she told me "Well that's not his decission!"

Here are some pictures of him with his haircut. I didn't "spike" it like how they had at the salon but only because it was almost bedtime. However, the style is that in the top on the front it has some "spiking" going on. So what do you all think?




This is a picture of him right after he got his hair cut. Not really the best bet you can somewhat see the style a bit better.


by on Nov. 28, 2012 at 11:53 PM
Replies (11-20):
ImNotKarl
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 10:22 AM

My mom chose for us at first, and then I took shears to my head in a fit of toddler anger about my hair, and from that point on she always let me choose. My dad never cared what I did to my hair as long as I didn't dress like a hussy, which wasn't a huge issue since by the time I got old enough to consider being a slut, I was the goth kid in school.

My son wants his hair long like his daddy's, so I'm letting him grow it. I trim the bangs to keep it out of his face, but other than that, if he wants long hair, I think he has the most beautiful curls on the planet, so I'm ok with that. People think he's a girl when we go places sometimes, but even he is starting to tell them he's a boy. He looks and dresses like a boy. I just want my son to be happy and comfortable with himself, and letting him make a choice about his hair is a good way to encourage him to make decisions without giving him free reign.

I had my hair all different colors, cuts, and styles. Even when I was last pregnant with my son I had purple streaks all through my hair, and I'm thinking of getting some of it pink right now. Who am I to walk around like someone's pet parrot and then tell my son he can't have hair like his dad's?

My hair when it was purple.

My son's hair.

Cooper's dad.

My tummy had the rumblies that only hands could satisfy.
NikiSellers0806
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 10:37 AM
1 mom liked this
I think its great to let kids make decisions for themselves, your mom is being ridiculous! Like a PP said alot of things aren't negotiable in a kids life but I've found that when I do give them a choice they are far more likely to cooperate. Whenever I take my oldest (he is 6) to get his haircut, its *always* his choice and he loves it. Right now he has a Beiber haircut going on but he says he wants spikey hair next time LOL. Ya just gotta pick your battles sometimes, I want my kids to have the skills and resources to be confident independent people as they grow up so its important to give them those opportunities to make choices for themselves. Decision making and problem solving skills are a necessity in life:)
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othermom
by Silver Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 11:00 AM

I let the kids pick most of the time.

Mommy4000
by Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 11:04 AM

I've always let my son pick his own haircut. Well, he at least gets an opinion on it, I've had to veto some picks, and he knows I have certain guidlines for what I will allow him to go out in public looking like, but for the most part he chooses what style to do. I don't see the big deal with your little one, he's still young and it's just a short average cut. What exactly does Mom think you let him do to it lol.

amy31308
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 11:06 AM
My son is 4 and decisions like that, what he wants to wear (season appropriate) what shoes, what color room he wants, what he wants for breakfast, I let him decide the things that just don't matter. I want him to be who he is.

Same with my daughter. She's super independent. If she wants to pick her clothes she can and she always wants to get dressed by herself. Sometimes shirts are backwards but that's okay because she did it herself and is proud. I'll let her decide if were going to put her hair in a pony or leave it down.

These are little things that shouldn't be a fight. Kids like to know their opinion matters. You'll grow little leaders if you don't try to control every little aspect.
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ashleydoom
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 11:31 AM
I let my son have a say in shooting things that reflect his own personal style (hairstyle, clothes, shoes, school supplies, etc) since he started preschool. he's 5 years old and in kindergarten now. you know, sometimes I'm actually surprised at how great he is with coordinating outfits and such. it makes me proud. and I've definitely noticed that he has a sense of pride also.
I believe letting my son choose his own hairstyles and clothing not only builds character, but give him a much stronger sense of self and also helps in learning about decision making.
my mother didn't let me choose my own clothes and hair style until I was damn near done with elementary school. I resented her for that for a long time. I so much further behind everyone else as far as finding myself went. when I started getting to choose, I noticed that everyone else had already been doing it for years in there I was inexperienced in completely hopeless as far as personal style went. it may not seem like a big deal to some people but seems like that matter when youre a pre-teen/ teenager.
but enough about me..... props to you for giving your son a chance to be himself and find his own personal style. As long as the parent has the last word ( just in case the hair or clothes are really out there and could possibly do more harm than good for the child) regarding the child's choice, i think it's a truly character building experience.
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delanna6two
by Platinum Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 1:21 PM

dad does all the hair cutting and changes it up from time to time.

delanna6two
by Platinum Member on Nov. 29, 2012 at 1:21 PM

Your ds hair is nice.

DixieFlower
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 4:15 PM

Well she feels that boys should have a part in their hair. She told me it's too short and that she didn't like how it sticks up all over. I

Quoting Mommy4000:

I've always let my son pick his own haircut. Well, he at least gets an opinion on it, I've had to veto some picks, and he knows I have certain guidlines for what I will allow him to go out in public looking like, but for the most part he chooses what style to do. I don't see the big deal with your little one, he's still young and it's just a short average cut. What exactly does Mom think you let him do to it lol.


DixieFlower
by on Nov. 29, 2012 at 4:19 PM

Thanks sounds like your mom and my mom were similar. I didn't get to decide on my hairstyle until I was 15.

Quoting ashleydoom:

I let my son have a say in shooting things that reflect his own personal style (hairstyle, clothes, shoes, school supplies, etc) since he started preschool. he's 5 years old and in kindergarten now. you know, sometimes I'm actually surprised at how great he is with coordinating outfits and such. it makes me proud. and I've definitely noticed that he has a sense of pride also.
I believe letting my son choose his own hairstyles and clothing not only builds character, but give him a much stronger sense of self and also helps in learning about decision making.
my mother didn't let me choose my own clothes and hair style until I was damn near done with elementary school. I resented her for that for a long time. I so much further behind everyone else as far as finding myself went. when I started getting to choose, I noticed that everyone else had already been doing it for years in there I was inexperienced in completely hopeless as far as personal style went. it may not seem like a big deal to some people but seems like that matter when youre a pre-teen/ teenager.
but enough about me..... props to you for giving your son a chance to be himself and find his own personal style. As long as the parent has the last word ( just in case the hair or clothes are really out there and could possibly do more harm than good for the child) regarding the child's choice, i think it's a truly character building experience.


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