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New here, stressed thehellout and I hope you guys are nice lol

Posted by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 1:05 PM
  • 12 Replies

Well I'm mama to two little girls, 1 and 2.5, we live in an apartment with two kitties and a workin daddy, I go to school but I'm basically a SAHM.  My sister is leaving her wife, who is making it very difficult to do so and using the housing laws of california against her so she doesn't have to leave.  Meanwhile though, her daughter, who is 28 and perpetually broke/unemployed/homeless is displaced because she was rooming there but is now being used as a pawn against my sister, being her BFF and all.  So I said she could stay here until everything blows over because while I don't really know her, my sister does and turns out she is awesome with my girls.  But other than being nice to the girls, she's pretty fuckin useless and it makes me really mad.  She says stuff like "I really really appreciate you guys" but then lays on the couch all day.  Or today, the girls get ME up at 5:30.  9 am rolls around and she gets mad because she can't sleep and goes and hides in the closet.  It's actually quite sad, like, I guess if I were her and I were able to sleep and lounge around all day I would, but when is enough enough?  I can understand why people in her situation were put there in the first place.

Last week my 2.5 year old and I had strep and a cold, it was pretty nasty, but with quick intervention and carefully keeping after her and myself, nobody else caught it, even though our apartment is really small and Lily is in your face constantly lol.  But the roomate did catch the cold, and though I feed her tons of vitamins every day and make her tea and blablabla, and she is acting like a total whiny baby about it.  I told her off last night, in a funny way and because my sister was here to make it all seem like whatever, that I didn't want to hear her whining anymore because my throat is scarred from strep and I still do everything and I did all last week when I was sick as hell, all I got was a three hour nap the entire course of my sickness.  Now I'm better, but a cold is not something that gives you a reason to sit on your ass and whine all day.  So there's that mess, too.  I told her I feel super bad and that's why I baby her with the tea and vitamins and she was like okay I feel better then....    Lol..

She eats our food, uses our internet and hogs the (only) couch.  She went out last night and bought herself food with her EBT, tells me that the cookies and string cheese are -hers-, I said politelely, you didn't get any for the girls?  Well, no, but I did save $80 for your house!  :):):)    What choice did I have but to thank her?  Even though she's eaten more than that already, and quite frankly I don't want to take her EBT money, I have my own and she clearly needs it more than we do.  I am just overwhelmed.  I really hate it when I'm the only adult in the house who is here and capable of helping out (cooking, cleaning, offering to take the kids for a minute) and other people straight up refuse to do anything.  She's super nice most of the time, and at least there's that, but I'm still pretty upset over it all. 


So what I want to present to you folks is this;  Do I have a right to be pissed off at all this? 

CafeMom Tickersbig smile miniCafeMom Tickers

by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 1:05 PM
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Replies (1-10):
3_girls_86
by Member on Jan. 12, 2013 at 1:15 PM
Yes. Tell her to get her as up if she doesn't like the kids waking get up. Why can't she look for a job? And tell her to stay putting food in the house if she's going to eat your food.
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eoewan
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 2:42 PM

You should be upset. She is a grown moocher. Time for her to go mooch off someone else. Your responsibility is to your children and dh. Why are you catering to her needs? She is grown. Something to remember: people treat you the way you let them.

luvsky15
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 2:45 PM
He'll yea.... To many people these days not wanting to grow up!
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MistressMinerva
by Jennifer on Jan. 12, 2013 at 2:46 PM

Welcome to the group.

Pammi86
by Pamela on Jan. 12, 2013 at 4:17 PM

Welcome to the group! : )

DragonMother10
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 4:27 PM
Sounds like my older brother. These people will never learn how to grow up if their behavior is being enabled. My dad doesn't really say much to my brother about not pulling around any weight. You are enabling this child (she acts like one) by not being firm about her looking for a job or if he is not going to work to at least help you with chores or watch the kids while you do things. You don't have to be mean about it.
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DixieFlower
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 8:00 PM

Welcome. I think it's time to set some house rules though.

SavanaF.
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 9:14 PM

I thought I did LOL but I talked to my hubs and sister who sent her here in the first place and she is being much nicer now.  Yes, I am a chicken who is terrified of confrontation.

nurbabe82
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 9:19 PM

 

Quoting eoewan:

You should be upset. She is a grown moocher. Time for her to go mooch off someone else. Your responsibility is to your children and dh. Why are you catering to her needs? She is grown. Something to remember: people treat you the way you let them.

 

OliviasMommy611
by on Jan. 12, 2013 at 9:35 PM


Quoting Pammi86:

Welcome to the group! : )

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