Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Advice to become stay at home mom.

Posted by   + Show Post

Hi all. I need some advice. i am wantting to become a stay at home mom. I just had my son last monday and loving every minute. I have an 8 year old and a 3 year old at home as well. all boys. i wasworknig for a company that i loved but not making very much $. i went out on disability oct 1st for almost delivering my son early.

i just delivered last week and am contemplating going back. daycare for allo 3 boys where i live is at minimm 2200. i dont even bring that home a month. my husband is working so we r trying to figure out if we can do it soley on one income. also if i do stsay home when, and how to tell work.

any advice?

by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 3:38 PM
Replies (11-20):
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 10:07 AM

If your husband is okay with it, you would have to make a budget (if you don't already have one) and see what is comingin, vs what is going out. If you have enough coming in to maintain neccessary items (rent, food, utilities, hygenic items) plus a little extra "just in case monies", then you should be okay. It would also be beneficial if you learned how to coupon and buy in bulk so that you're helping save money on food. If you have cable and want to keep it, consider lowering the package you have or getting rid of it all together and use Netflix and Hulu. The two of them combined come to a little over $20/mo which is a whole lot cheaper than any cable I've ever seen. It's definitely possible even with moderate income.

by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 10:30 AM

I would say it is all in your budget! If you can afford it then do so! I work pt bc we can not.

by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 11:41 AM

Thank you all for the great advice, i sat down and talked to DH last night finally (he works 10 hour days and hour and a half away so getting him when hes not sleeping is kind of hard.) i think we have come to the conclusion to stay home. we will work things out as they come. we dont qualify for WIC with even just his income which sucks but.... we will make it work. i now just need to figure out what to tell my job in the nicest of ways because i have been out since oct 1st on disability. i havent started geting any money from the maternity leave so i dont think there will be anything to pay back. we still have medical through him which is nice. now  just what to tell them.

by Ruby Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 11:46 AM

 You would tell work the truth. You can't afford daycare. Unless you can get family to watch them for you.

by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:21 PM
You can do it! It isn't easy but the stuff worth doing rarely is. :0)
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 6:06 PM

I chose to be a "SAHM" when it was just my son and I. The childcare rates here are ridiculous too. It was either pay about $160 a week or find something else, and when you make barely above minimum wage and all you get goes to all the bills because you're the only income it gets tough. So I got a job that allowed me to pick my hours and work from home. Now this job was more tailored to me since I'm a big techy type. I was able to network and find a company willing to work with me. It also ended up being a big pay increase too.

If you can do it though. DO IT!

Now that I am married, I don't work with the company anymore because we moved. I could have gone back to work, having two incomes would make our lives "squishy" and we've toyed at the idea. Instead I chose to go back to school, and I tutor part time on the side for a little extra income.


Advice that I did myself.

The first step: Line up your finances. Sometimes as a SAHM you have to learn a few new tricks, and you'll have the time to do them. Like Couponing, or making certain items at home like clothes soap. I do a lot of DIY stuff mainly because our income atm is really supper below poverty low. (We're both full-time students at school. Hubby is at a Medical School if that really give you an idea on how little we make).

When I'm not in school, and I'm not playing taxi for my son's activities, I am a homemaker through and through. I do minor sewing and patching of clothes, Couponing, I grow a lot of my veggies and fresh herbs in the community garden, (We talked this out with our neighbors at the apartment complex and brought it to the apartment office.)  We buy flour and other such items in bulk (At our local wholesale store), so I do all my baking myself.

I also do "trade for services". One of my friends is a hair stylist. She does our hair for free and I babysit her little one twice a month so she can go out with friends. I have another friend who works at a nail salon so she does our nails (and I'm not talking about painting them I'm talking about the pedicure and manicure to keep them healthy and soft) and I tutor her.  Everyone is tight on money now day's so there's always ways you can cut corners.  

Check list

  1. List all your mandatory bills (I.E rent, food, utilities)
  2. List all your bills you may be able to cut the cost some (Phones, Internet, Cable, Gas)
  3. List all your expenditures you can completely cut the cost on (Eating out, Trips, Movies)

Call your car insurance and see what you can do to lower it. I just recently lowered my by $60 a year because it has a "loss of wages" benefit and I'm not working so it's not needed for my car.

We cut our phone bill by $45 a month by having pre-paid plans. Mine is what we call an "emergency only" type of phone. I have all the important numbers saved on it. If I get a call that I don't know, I let it go to VM and then check it from hubby's phone.

We only ever do movies and eating out on special occasions like last movie seen was Avengers for little one's B-day last year. And even then it's coupons and "deal days" like hitting the movie up at 11am on Monday so it's $5each.

We called our internet company and found out we qualified for one of their discount programs, so now we have cabled internet for $10 a month, which saved us about $35 a month. We have no TV channels though and that's okay by us.

If you can invest in bicycles do so. We have a two seat "tricycle" for adults with a basket on the end. It's great if I just need to do a quick run up the store for a couple of items or I am getting my son from school. Saves a lot on gas. My hubby also has a bike which he uses for school.

After you work through your finances and still want to do it. Then the best way is to right a letter of resignation to your work place, thanking them for the opportunity to work with them and everything.

Good Luck!

by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 6:53 PM

Well, if you don't bring in enough to pay for daycare there is your answer. You can't afford to go to work if your going to pay out all you make and MORE on daycare. You'd have even less income than just his salary

by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 4:16 PM

Make a budget and see if it is possible. If it is, it then becomes your job to save every penny you can. Clip coupons, shop during sales for things you need, make things yourself rather than buying ready-made products, and so much more. You will probably be asked to give up things that you are used to having unless they are totally necessary. It will be hard. In the long run, it can work out well as long as your family helps you save where you can. It can also be even more satisfying than a job outside of the home. It depends on how you take to it.

by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 6:32 PM

I'd have to say for you to be a SAHM for a household of 5 people, your husband would have to pull in at least 50k a year, for you guys to be a comfortable. But that would be with seriously pinching pennies.

by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 7:12 PM

my husband and i both stay at home with our kids. I hated working and missing out on so much.

Discover your Tru Beauty    Mommy to 3 Sets WAHM 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)