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Should either of us feel guilty about this?

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So my 3 year old woke up at 6 AM this morning, our alarms go off at 6:45. She wanted to watch TV. We told her no and DH told her to go back to bed. She asked if she could cuddle with me. My 3 year old has not asked to cuddle in bed with me in over a year. DH can't sleep if there is a child in bed with us. So instead of making him have to stay awake I got up with our 3 year old and we went to the living room and cuddled on the couch where I fell back asleep. DH came out about twenty minutes later and said he felt guilty and that he'd just get up and that our dd and I should go back to our bed and try to get some more sleep. So dd and I did go back to bed.

I don't think he should have felt guilty about us cuddling on the couch and I feel kind of bad that he got up almost half an hour early because he felt guilty. lol

He says we should have just made her go back to bed, but I wanted to cuddle with her and she never asks for this anymore not to mention she probably would have cried very loudly and woken up her sisters if we had made her go back to bed.

DH and I aren't having a fight about this or anything. I was just curious if this is a situation you would have felt bad in?

by on Feb. 7, 2013 at 11:10 AM
Replies (11-18):
splatz
by Sarah on Feb. 7, 2013 at 10:46 PM

meh... hes a big boy, he can get over it. I would have stuck her in bed with me. I take any cuddles I can get from my kiddos. :)

skippito
by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 5:37 AM
Lol! I hyperventillate when i think about the nights when i'm sleepless because i don't know where they are and what they are doing. My sis (who has 7 kids) and I say even though we would really like sleep it will never again be more than a wistful though lmao! It is so funny how we long for just a little break and then miss them so much..... Murphy's Law at work right there!!!!


Quoting MamaMoopsie:

 We jokingly said "We'll be able to sleep when our kids are grown," in front of my mom and dad the other day and my parents laughed hysterically and said it gets worse after they grow up and you can't keep your eye on them 24/7.


We went through a stretch recently where my 1 year old got seven teeth in like two weeks and the nights were miserable, she'd cry so much that it'd wake up our other little ones and soon I'd be on the couch with all three of them trying to calm them all down. DH would come out and take over and try to let me sleep but I couldn't because I knew how hard he was having it and he's the one who actually had to go to work and be held accountable. Then as soon as my 1 year old got past her teething she got bronchitis, then as she was getting over that our 2 year old got an ear ache. I don't think I got more than an hours sleep for over a month. My mother even offered to take them all for a night so DH and I could get a decent nights sleep and then I couldn't sleep because I missed them too much and was wondering how much of a hard time they were giving my parents. lol




Quoting skippito:

It always works that way doesn't lol?! That night everyone sleeps i usually toss and turn and have to pee and check on evryone and feel more tired than the usual nights when the girls get up a handful of times. I tell myself, one day I shall sleep again lmao!!!!



 


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LilliesValley
by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 5:51 AM
1 mom liked this
If its within an hour of get up time I'll let dd get in bed, but I have to say this doesn't happen very often at all. They're only young once and for such a short time. If its the middle of the night then back to bed she must go! On the weekends she does get up between 7-8 (we usually get up at 5) and will crawl in with us. Then she will say to dh, "papa its time to get up!" And I usually get to sleep in for another hour or so.

I wouldn't have felt bad either way. You did something nice by getting up with her and moving to the coach, and he did something nice by getting up early. In a good marriage you just do those things.
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Basherte
by Bronze Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 8:14 AM


Quoting LilliesValley:

If its within an hour of get up time I'll let dd get in bed, but I have to say this doesn't happen very often at all. They're only young once and for such a short time. If its the middle of the night then back to bed she must go! On the weekends she does get up between 7-8 (we usually get up at 5) and will crawl in with us. Then she will say to dh, "papa its time to get up!" And I usually get to sleep in for another hour or so.

I wouldn't have felt bad either way. You did something nice by getting up with her and moving to the coach, and he did something nice by getting up early. In a good marriage you just do those things.

My son gets up at 6am every morning. I get up with him 5 days out of 7. My DH gets up with him those 2 mornings. I like sleeping in, but always feel guilty about it when I get up. 

Cause I missed that time with my little guy. My son normally sleeps through the night. If he does wake up in the middle of the night, he plays and giggles for a few minutes and then it's back to sleep he goes. The only time I get up with him is if he cries for longer than a few minutes.


wedding countdown

LilliesValley
by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 8:32 AM
I'm definately with you on the guilt. I do feel a little guilty but dh loves am time with dd. I was sick for two years so a lot of the time it was just them. I'm so happy she has a good relationship with dh, hopefully she won't have guy issues later because dh gives her plenty of attention. I have fibro and chronic fatigue so the right amount of sleep is important but I still feel like what did I miss? When I get up.


Quoting Basherte:


Quoting LilliesValley:

If its within an hour of get up time I'll let dd get in bed, but I have to say this doesn't happen very often at all. They're only young once and for such a short time. If its the middle of the night then back to bed she must go! On the weekends she does get up between 7-8 (we usually get up at 5) and will crawl in with us. Then she will say to dh, "papa its time to get up!" And I usually get to sleep in for another hour or so.



I wouldn't have felt bad either way. You did something nice by getting up with her and moving to the coach, and he did something nice by getting up early. In a good marriage you just do those things.

My son gets up at 6am every morning. I get up with him 5 days out of 7. My DH gets up with him those 2 mornings. I like sleeping in, but always feel guilty about it when I get up. 

Cause I missed that time with my little guy. My son normally sleeps through the night. If he does wake up in the middle of the night, he plays and giggles for a few minutes and then it's back to sleep he goes. The only time I get up with him is if he cries for longer than a few minutes.


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Janet
by Ruby Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:23 AM

Nothing to feel guilty about you both did the right thing. It sounds like you have a nice family.

Basherte
by Bronze Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 10:30 AM

Yeah me too. The only thing that kind of offsets that is when I get up my son is all about mommy. :)

He wants me to hold him for a while after I get up. It's nice to know that he missed me. It would be better for me if he let me wake up first though. 


Quoting LilliesValley:

I'm definately with you on the guilt. I do feel a little guilty but dh loves am time with dd. I was sick for two years so a lot of the time it was just them. I'm so happy she has a good relationship with dh, hopefully she won't have guy issues later because dh gives her plenty of attention. I have fibro and chronic fatigue so the right amount of sleep is important but I still feel like what did I miss? When I get up.


Quoting Basherte:


Quoting LilliesValley:

If its within an hour of get up time I'll let dd get in bed, but I have to say this doesn't happen very often at all. They're only young once and for such a short time. If its the middle of the night then back to bed she must go! On the weekends she does get up between 7-8 (we usually get up at 5) and will crawl in with us. Then she will say to dh, "papa its time to get up!" And I usually get to sleep in for another hour or so.



I wouldn't have felt bad either way. You did something nice by getting up with her and moving to the coach, and he did something nice by getting up early. In a good marriage you just do those things.

My son gets up at 6am every morning. I get up with him 5 days out of 7. My DH gets up with him those 2 mornings. I like sleeping in, but always feel guilty about it when I get up. 

Cause I missed that time with my little guy. My son normally sleeps through the night. If he does wake up in the middle of the night, he plays and giggles for a few minutes and then it's back to sleep he goes. The only time I get up with him is if he cries for longer than a few minutes.




wedding countdown

achorney
by Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 12:41 PM

no. 

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