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stay at home mom, stressed, and in need of someone to just vent to!

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:40 AM
  • 12 Replies

HI GUYS NEW TO THE SITE AND JUST NEEDED A PLACE WHERE I CAN TALK TO SOMEONE AND GET OTHERS INPUT AND ADVICE....WELL IM 22, MY HUSBAND IS IN THE ARMY AND WERE CURRENTLY IN HAWAII...I HAVE A SON WHO IS ALMOST 9 MONTHS AND IM PREGNANT NOW WITH MY SECOND CHILD WHO IS DUE JULY 2013...I LOVE LOVE BEING A MOM I NEVER KNEW HOW PASSIONATE I WOULD BECOME ABOUT BEING A MOTHER...A PARENT. MY HUSBAND GOT WOUNDED WHEN HE WAS OVERSEAS SO HE WORKS FROM BASE...I MET MY HUSBAND 4 YEARS AGO BEFORE HE WAS DEPLO..YED AND WE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE CANT KEEP OUR HANDS OFF EACH OTHER ITS JUST WAS SO NATURAL AND EFFORTLESS...FASTFORWARD WE MARRIED MAY 21 2012 AND AFTER THE BIRTH OF OUR SON I MOVED DOWN TO HAWAII TO BE WITH HIM. IT JUST SEEMS LIKE HE IS A DIFFRENT PERSON...HE IS A DIFFRENT PERSON...I JUST FEEL LIKE HES IN HIS OWN LITTLE WORLD...I COOK, CLEAN, CHASE AFTER MY SON ALL DAY AND ITS LIKE THERES NNO TIME LEFT...MY ONLY TIME TO MYSELF IS MY 10 MINS IN THE SHOWER IF THAT...AND HELP FROM THE HUSBAND, THERE IS NONE UGH I CANT EVEN FINISH IM SO EMOTIONAL DONT KNOW IF THATS THE STRESS OR THE PREGNANCY HA

by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:40 AM
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Replies (1-10):
bi-polarmommy
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:44 AM
1 mom liked this

 talk to him about how you're feeling, ask him why he is so reserved now

use "I" statments - "I" feel overwhelmed, not "YOU" statements - "YOU" never help

armywifey0612
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 3:53 AM

trust me we've had numerous convos were i just try to express how i feel...how does he feel? what we could do to help each other and its like he hears me he tries for maybe like two days  and its like whatever we said/talked about goes out the window

mandi.west85
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 7:14 AM
I have a 7 month old so I am right there with u. I have forced my DH to take our daughter so I can go take a shower. I slowly worked it up by 15 min at first then 30min and so on. My DH is very nervous around her bcuz if she cries he doesnt know how to comfort her. I have told him thanks for watching her everytime no matter if she is crying. Men have to be praised. After 2 months of doing this last weekend I left for 3 hrs. I nurse too, so she wants me more than anyone. Hang n there
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Janet
by Ruby Member on Mar. 8, 2013 at 8:23 AM
2 moms liked this
Sounds like my husband.

Quoting armywifey0612:

trust me we've had numerous convos were i just try to express how i feel...how does he feel? what we could do to help each other and its like he hears me he tries for maybe like two days  and its like whatever we said/talked about goes out the window

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MJP76
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 10:18 AM

Does he suffer from PTSD? Maybe he needs to seek help.

goddess99
by Michelle on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:33 AM

I agree with this. He sounds stressed and depressed.

Quoting MJP76:

Does he suffer from PTSD? Maybe he needs to seek help.


splatz
by Sarah on Mar. 8, 2013 at 12:46 PM
1 mom liked this
Same thing I thought. Men don't always know what to do in the baby stage either. Men don't instantly bond with babies like women do. And they don't have that natural instinct on how to take care of them. Babies can be pretty intimidating. Tell him how you feel.

Quoting goddess99:

I agree with this. He sounds stressed and depressed.

Quoting MJP76:

Does he suffer from PTSD? Maybe he needs to seek help.


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aprilz1225
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 4:20 PM

 I come from a huge miliatry family; my dad, my brothers, cousins you name it from the navy to nat'l guard.. it took time for alot of them to get back to "normal" life. give it some time. it takes a little while but he will come around. if you are conserned about it in the ways of PTSD speak to some one about by yourself first and see if that could be possible. Tell your husband thank you, thank you both! it can be a tough life at times i know.

Radarma
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 5:59 PM

 Don't know much about military spousehood, but I am twenty years with the father of my two kids, 16 of them married, and we too went through a stage much like yours in the beginning.

It's rough honey, and men are pretty simple. We women, not so much.

I feel ya kiddo, and you have my ears.

bi-polarmommy
by on Mar. 8, 2013 at 11:28 PM

 try reading "The Five Languages of Love"

maybe you're not expressing your love/concern for each other in term the other understands

Quoting armywifey0612:

trust me we've had numerous convos were i just try to express how i feel...how does he feel? what we could do to help each other and its like he hears me he tries for maybe like two days  and its like whatever we said/talked about goes out the window

 

Come join me at Multi-Generational Special Needs Households, a place for moms dealing with 2 or more generations of special needs under one roof


http://www.cafemom.com/group/118250/

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