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I was wondering.

Posted by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:20 PM
  • 17 Replies
How can yoou tell a first time grand parent to just learn to be grandma and not be so overbearing. My In law got mad at me because I gave my son a piece of bread. My fiance said something but it didnt make me feel better. I wish I could tell her that she needs to be a mother to her own damn kids not mine. Its a bit difficult living with the In laws! They are overbearing and I just want to move, but not enough money to move. What would you ladies do or have done?
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 6:20 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MJP76
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 7:16 PM

Well, I'd never live with my parents or in-laws...lol 

 it's way easier to tell someone to chill the heck out, if you don't live with them. You really don't have much of a leg to stand on IMO

MamaSnaps
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 7:54 PM

The problem there is that you are living with the in-laws. Both of you are going to be touchy and this is just one of probably many things that drive you insane-and her too.

At this point the answer? Get out of the in-law's home. You are in a position where she's still raising him and evidently you too seeing how you are living with them. When you are there he is still their child and always will be. If you are living with him most parents are going to feel that seeing how you are not on your own two feet you still need a parent too. It's natural to parent your child and any extensions of them.

You live in their house, by their rules and you have to respect them-that's a recipe for a nightmare and VERY few can do it. In her position it's really not an exact reverse either. She has to respect you as a person, but it's her home, her rules and she's the parent to boot. You never stop being a parent to your children. When your son is a teen and has his girlfriend over and you start mom'ing them... just think back to today. She's just mom'ing you!  

mamazeus
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 7:55 PM

I dont want to live with them but we have to, for now. We cant support ourselves entirely on our own. It sucks because my mom isnt a first time grandma but his mom is and my mom understands the difference. I just feel so aggravated about all this and I feel angry a lot more, I am glad I work 5 days straight and I also get to work the days my MIL has off. So I can keep away as much as possible.

MJP76
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 7:58 PM


I would think that would be something you'd think about before having children?

Quoting mamazeus:

I dont want to live with them but we have to, for now. We cant support ourselves entirely on our own. It sucks because my mom isnt a first time grandma but his mom is and my mom understands the difference. I just feel so aggravated about all this and I feel angry a lot more, I am glad I work 5 days straight and I also get to work the days my MIL has off. So I can keep away as much as possible.



mamazeus
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:00 PM

Thank you. :D I wish it was easy to leave. I just want her to not give me grief for any thing I give my kid to eat. Maybe her kids were treated like delicate china but I feel she has no right to mean mug us for doing something for our son. Its not like its going to kill him if he eats bread!

goddess99
by Michelle on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:03 PM

I've never lived with anyone either. I would do what I could to bring in more money and move out.

mamazeus
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:05 PM

I thank you for the advice but not the judgment. I was in college and graduated with an associates degree 7 months pregnant. I couldnt abort it. I hate the thought of that. We are just trying to make enough to live comfortably and pay for our wedding. I am young and I know it was reckless, but I couldnt be without this child. I do my best!

mamazeus
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:08 PM

Thanks, thats exactly what I'm doing. 

MJP76
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:09 PM


Right but grandmas always think they know best, and with you living with them you just have to bite your tongue, and bide your time.

Quoting mamazeus:

Thank you. :D I wish it was easy to leave. I just want her to not give me grief for any thing I give my kid to eat. Maybe her kids were treated like delicate china but I feel she has no right to mean mug us for doing something for our son. Its not like its going to kill him if he eats bread!



MJP76
by on Mar. 23, 2013 at 8:15 PM


You say not judgement, however it's all just common sense. Also when you are speaking to someone it helps if you quote them so they know you are speaking to them. Most times people won't come back to a post multiple times unless they know you are speaking to them.

Quoting mamazeus:

I thank you for the advice but not the judgment. I was in college and graduated with an associates degree 7 months pregnant. I couldnt abort it. I hate the thought of that. We are just trying to make enough to live comfortably and pay for our wedding. I am young and I know it was reckless, but I couldnt be without this child. I do my best!



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