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What would you do if YOU were in this situation? Please help!

Posted by on May. 1, 2013 at 11:55 AM
  • 7 Replies

Ok, some back round on this:

My 7 year old DD and her friend were being bullied by one particular girl. The father of DD's friend told the parent of the bully that his daughter will get angry and fight and he just wanted to warn her (the parent) and also told the parent that the bulling needed to stop. I was thankful at the time because it stopped for my DD for a little while, meantime it stopped compleatly for DD friend. Eventually I had to involve the school to stop it.

Now, last week my DD and her class went on a field trip and of course DD and her friend (the same one I was talking about above) had to sit together on the bus. Two days after the field trip DD's friend father called me. He said that my DD was not sharing the window seat with his daughter and then my DD threatened to not be friends with his child anymore unless she can sit at the window seat. Now, he claims that his DD moved for my DD on the way too and back from the field trip. Now he also said that his DD said "If she doesn't get her way she always says she wont be my friend anymore". Now I cant see a 7 year old say this like that, but.. fine. Then he proceeds to tell me that my DD is a bully and that's not how friends treat people then said that his DD will get angry and fight if need be. Now, I stayed calm and said I will talk with my DD and I agree that was not ok for her to say. I then asked how long has his DD complained that my DD has threatentheir friendship or been a bully, has it been going on for a few weeks? Months? a year? I also asked was there anything else that my DD has been doing? He said just this last week and she only threatened the friendship twice. Um, ok... I reassured him I will talk with my DD and reassured him that there is not need for violence and asked him if he would like me to ask my DD to stay away from his DD in that case? He said no just talk to her and that he was just warning me.....

Alright, I get this guy and I cant change his mind. He used the same tactic on me that he used on a BULLY and my daughter has just made a bad mistake.

So I talked with my DD and she of course had another story but I knew there was the truth somewhere between the two. She felt horrible and apologized to her friend.

Today my DD on the way to school informs me that yesterday her friends dad told my DD that she wont share things with her friends. In the line to go home my DD confronted her friends father and said she would share and then the father told her he didn't believe her.

So this morning I tried to talk with him and he out right denied it. Then brought up the situation from last week. I told him I was hearing different stories and I am sure the truth lays between the two and I handled the situation then asked if there was anything else I needed to know about. The father said there was nothing else then proceed to say that his DD does not lie and then went on and on again about last weeks situation....which apparently I handled.

I do not like the direction this is going. Honestly, I like his daughter and she is the only friend at school my DD has. I cant take that away from her. However...the father seems to hold some serious grudges about pretty stuff and takes it out on little girls...what am I to do?

 

 

by on May. 1, 2013 at 11:55 AM
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Replies (1-7):
MommyBell
by on May. 1, 2013 at 12:37 PM
The dad seems like a bully and is all too happy to have his 7 year oldĀ  Fight. Hopefully he can learn to talk like an adult and not like a child egging on a fight. If not dd needs to find another friend.
puppykid
by on May. 1, 2013 at 1:07 PM

I have no idea what to do but I was in a similar day when Esmee got caught in the boys toilets at school.

TimetoMomUp
by on May. 1, 2013 at 1:19 PM

I think the Dad is threatening violence.  Might be time to talk to the authorities at the school.

puppykid
by on May. 1, 2013 at 1:24 PM

I hat it when adults threaten children

Janet
by Ruby Member on May. 1, 2013 at 6:59 PM
1 mom liked this

 I think your DD needs to find another friend. I wouldn't want anthing to do with her father.

MamaSnaps
by on May. 1, 2013 at 7:04 PM
1 mom liked this

I have a serious problem with a parent who is encouraging violence in a child and threatening another child by way of the parent. He's essentially saying "deal with your kid or mine will beat her up." NOT COOL AT ALL.

I am not sure that I'd want my child to be hanging around with his child. Not something I'd want my child to see, hear, experience in ANY way. That child is being set up for some major issues in the teen years and it WILL get ugly. I would highly encourage my child to make other friends. Never to be mean to the other child but, to make friends with other kids. Then I'd encourage and enable those frienships as much as possible while doing everything to discourage the friendship with the dad/bully child.  

armyvet06
by Member on May. 1, 2013 at 7:06 PM
That father seems like an arrogant ass. I think it's time to talk with authorities at the school like another pp said.
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