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I'm just a housewife, I should be...

Posted by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 8:58 PM
  • 23 Replies
keeping the house clean while I take care of both babies. We have a 5 week old and a 21 month old. I'm getting maybe 3 hrs total sleep each day/night. Yes, I chose this. I'm just venting. He goes to sleep in the bedroom and closes the door and turns the white noise on. I'm recovering from a section and have had a sinus infection. He gets 6-9 hrs sleep/night and can't even take care of both babies and the house on the weekends. I sleep on the couch because he snores, which means even less sleep for me. I have had no help since he went back to work when the 5 week old was 1 week. I seriously want to strangle him for those words even coming out of his mouth. I do keep the house clean and picked up, but I seriously don't have the energy to dust right now and I'M GOING ON NO SLEEP ::end vent::

***Thanks, ladies :) I feel much better today and it was nice to read your responses and words of encouragement!! We looked into hiring someone for the first few weeks, but that didn't work out. I figure at this point, I've got it. Yesterday just sucked. To answer y'all asking about my mom helping, she's too busy. It's ok, though. I didn't expect her help. I had a long talk with the husband and I think we've come to an understanding ;) ***
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 8:58 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mami286
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 10:59 PM
1 mom liked this

vent away!!!!!! im in the same boat. sadly my bodies ammune to doing everything already and i try to get things to where i can easily handle things. but you try to communicate how you seriously feel to hubby. if hes easy to talk to.

MamaMerkle126
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:05 PM
1 mom liked this

I had my twins via Csec and three weeks in, between trying like hell to breastfeed, overexerting myself, PPD, a wound infection and sleep deprivation, I ended up in the hospital. Your husband is being an asshole in my opinion. I don't care if he works, he is OBLIGATED to do his part in the parenting and housework. You need to confront him. Hell, if you have to, talk to his mom. I would smack my husband right in the mouth if he spoke to me that way (okay, not really, but I'd fantasize about it). SHAME on him.

MamaMerkle126
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:07 PM
3 moms liked this

And being a housewife/stay at home mom is a hell of a lot harder than anyone believes it to be until they DO IT. Make him stay home alone with the little ones for a day or two and see how he handle it.

Kimberlynn
by on Jun. 26, 2013 at 11:53 PM
1 mom liked this
BIG ((HUGS))!! I'll make you a deal. You go get some rest and I will come and smack him around for you! : ) Maybe that will dislodge his head out of his ass and he'll start coming to his senses and realize that he needs to majorly help you. Is there anyone (your/his mom) that can also come help for a little while? I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope things get a lot better soon!
SAHM2011
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 12:29 AM
1 mom liked this

Honey everyone needs a good vent every now and then. Especially SAHM's. I have days like this too. In your case it's even worse because your children aren't far apart in age, your sleep deprived, no energy, and still expected to do your norm. It takes a toll on you.  With me it was just having enough time to take a shower every day and shave my legs. Men are like that. As bad as I hate to say that, it's seriously the one thing that every man has in common. It's not fair in any way. They help create the children, and say that they 'want' to have them. But when it happens they don't do the things that they should be doing to be a family. As well as be helpful to you to make things easier. In reality it's because they think they do more than we do. They think that we have it easier staying at home. My husband actually told me that one time when we were talking about this same issue.      It'll get better. In due time. I know it seems like a lot, but it will get better. GL

mp0264
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 12:35 AM

I hope you don't mind me asking, but what is your income like? Maybe you can hire a maid or cleaning service to help. You do need the help, when you're recovering.

mp0264
by on Jun. 27, 2013 at 12:36 AM
1 mom liked this

I completley agree with this response! 100 percent. My husband told me the same thing and thinks like this response. "Men are like that" is the perfect statement. I really hope she finds peace with the situation.

Quoting SAHM2011:

Honey everyone needs a good vent every now and then. Especially SAHM's. I have days like this too. In your case it's even worse because your children aren't far apart in age, your sleep deprived, no energy, and still expected to do your norm. It takes a toll on you.  With me it was just having enough time to take a shower every day and shave my legs. Men are like that. As bad as I hate to say that, it's seriously the one thing that every man has in common. It's not fair in any way. They help create the children, and say that they 'want' to have them. But when it happens they don't do the things that they should be doing to be a family. As well as be helpful to you to make things easier. In reality it's because they think they do more than we do. They think that we have it easier staying at home. My husband actually told me that one time when we were talking about this same issue.      It'll get better. In due time. I know it seems like a lot, but it will get better. GL


goddess99
by Michelle on Jun. 27, 2013 at 9:56 AM
1 mom liked this

I agree with getting someone to come in and clean if you can afford it. Otherwise, put your foot down and make him help you. His job isn't to be a prick.

MistressMinerva
by Jennifer on Jun. 27, 2013 at 10:01 AM
1 mom liked this

I would see if you can hire someone to come in and clean or maybe you have some family or friends that would help you out. Either way I would put my foot down and tell him that he needs to start helping.

Janet
by Ruby Member on Jun. 27, 2013 at 11:05 AM
1 mom liked this
Don't worry about everything being perfect. Your house doesn't have to be. You are just hurting yourself. You need to get some rest to take care of those babies for now. Maybe you can get a friend or relative to come help once a week to help you clean. I feel for you I really do.
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