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My Husband Just Shot my Hopes down the Drain

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We were all on board to try for our second child next in a few months then out of no where he decides he wants to wait another year. I am so pissed. Reason, I just found the pefect doctor, I am in perfect health, I am at my ideal weight, I have the perfect health insurance, I love my job and our budget is great. To make matters better our DS in pretty much potty training himself and doing great in daycare. Last time, I listened to him I ended up with sucky insurance, a shitty doctor, and many health problems to follow from the L&D staff messing up. We were all on board and I don't know what happened. He also wants to back out of getting me the house which is fine because the one he wants is bigger. I just don't feel like I'm being valued.

by on Jul. 26, 2013 at 4:12 PM
Replies (11-20):
by Bronze Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 9:15 AM
by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:10 AM

Have you communicated exactly what you just said? Do you know "why" he isn't on board? Don't ever be afraid to talk things out. It doesn't have to mean someone loses. Going through the differences in talking about it is how to get to the compromise, understanding, respect that we all need. Listening well and taking in consideration both sides of feelings makes a win/win situation. If you are afraid of what you don't know, you may create it.

by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:12 AM
explain the last part to him when you sit down and discuss this and point out why it is a good time for you.

Quoting BluLady:

He says that it's money he's concerned about but we've never been as better off as we are now. He's just cheap in my opinion. It just frustrates me because I just found out that my doctor thinks I have endometriosis so waiting could me no more children
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by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:13 AM
1 mom liked this

just because he wants to wait an year doesnt mean "NO", it just means ..wait

babies come in their own time as i learned, i had my first and only child at forty, you got plenty of time to try again

by Bronze Member on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:18 AM

I would talk to him about the reasons why. Bring up the endometriosis (spelling... I am being lazy with not going back to copy your spelling of it.), and let him know that the doctor feels that waiting could mean no more children for you.

I had that a long time ago. Before I had any kids. Getting pregnant was my doctor's prescription for it, after the laproscopy (spelling). Or to go on birth control. *giggles* I couldn't remember to take it every day and it still took us like 6 months to get pregnant. Even though we hadn't been planning on it.

I've had 2 more since then.

Good luck Momma. It does seem to be the perfect time for you and your family. Just make sure to take his concerns into consideration as well.

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by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:19 AM
2 moms liked this
What's wrong with waiting?? Thy doctor will always be there for you... Wait until he's ready.
by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:22 AM

you should have a talk with your hubby & tell him how you feel goodluck mama i hope everything works out 

by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:26 AM, my doctor told me that i had endometriosis, and this was BEFORE i got pregnant at forty. sounds more to me like your husband is just trying to be reasonable which, considering the economy, isnt a bad thing. your doctor on the other hand, is more then likely eager for you to get pregnant again so he can keep up those yacht payments. after our daughter was born( in a bathroom, no less) , my doctor tried very hard to convince me that i couldnt possibly get pregnant again because i was "too old"  i told my obgyn , that if i got pregnant once, it could happen thank you. been there, done that

by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:33 AM
I would just keep going its your body. I wouldn't try but ,I wouldn't avoid. Freak him. Its going to be a while before your baby is here anyways.
by on Jul. 30, 2013 at 10:51 AM

Quoting Nicoleb9:

As much as it sucks, the last thing you want to do is make a baby with a man whom you already know isn't fully on board with it.

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