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I am a birth mother

Posted by on Sep. 18, 2013 at 6:55 PM
  • 35 Replies
7 moms liked this

When I was 14 years old I got pregnant with my first daughter. I knew I was to young to care for her and give her everything she deserved so I decided the best thing for her would be to place her for adoption. Throughout the years I have gotten so much hassle for making that hard decision. But I never let anyone bring me down because I knew everyone has an opinion and there's was just wrong. ;-)

 Now almost 11 years later I have a good relationship with her mother. I am grateful tothat i get to hear all about the things she is doing and what she enjoys and even better are the pictures i get to see of her. To this day no matter what anyone says I would make that decision all over again if i had to. She has an amazing life and parents and I couldn't be any happier for her!

I hope when the day comes in the future when i get to meet her she is not angry and gives me a chance to explain why I did what I did. Not because I did not "want" her but because I love her so much she deserved the world and I knew her parents would be able to give her that! 

by on Sep. 18, 2013 at 6:55 PM
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Replies (1-10):
catevincesmom
by on Sep. 18, 2013 at 6:58 PM
2 moms liked this

I see no reason to judge you for that decision.  You did what you felt was right for your dd, & I'm sure it wasn't easy.   And I'm sure the addoptive mother, if she's sharing info, will help explain to dd when the time comes that you made your decision out of love. 

BatMom.
by on Sep. 18, 2013 at 7:02 PM
3 moms liked this
You did what was best FOR HER, and it's sad some people can't see that. Good for you! I'm sure she will understand when you do talk to her about it, and she'll see what an awesome thing you did for her, as well as her parents.
johnny4ever
by Mrs. Depp on Sep. 18, 2013 at 7:16 PM

Brave decision!

kerryket
by Bronze Member on Sep. 18, 2013 at 7:19 PM
Hugs to you, I'm glad the family has honored your open adoption so you get to see her grow and be a part of her life. What a frightening position to be in, and a decision that difficult to make at such a young age. I don't understand other people who condemn women who choose adoption, try not to let them get to you.

I was the fourth child of my birth mother, my records are sealed and a few years ago I requested my non identifying information. To my surprise, my parents were married, but things were not going well, the marriage was coming apart, the kids had medical issues and so did my mother. Her sister, mother and father had passed, some of pretty damn tragic. I can't imagine how alone she must have felt. I wish I could tell her that the baby girl she wanted "To have a chance" did, and was raised in a good home.

MistressMinerva
by Jennifer on Sep. 18, 2013 at 7:35 PM


Quoting BatMom.:

You did what was best FOR HER, and it's sad some people can't see that. Good for you! I'm sure she will understand when you do talk to her about it, and she'll see what an awesome thing you did for her, as well as her parents.


jessie0221
by on Sep. 18, 2013 at 8:01 PM

Good for you.  Seriously.  I don't know if I could be as mature and unselfish at 14.  

celestegood
by Gold Member on Sep. 18, 2013 at 8:17 PM
This. You are a wonderful mother to think of her and not yourself.

Quoting catevincesmom:

I see no reason to judge you for that decision.  You did what you felt was right for your dd, & I'm sure it wasn't easy.   And I'm sure the addoptive mother, if she's sharing info, will help explain to dd when the time comes that you made your decision out of love. 

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
HIJKLM
by Member on Sep. 18, 2013 at 8:19 PM
I think that was a very mature and selfless decision. No bashing here.
celestegood
by Gold Member on Sep. 18, 2013 at 8:19 PM
I agree. I'm not sure I could have made such an unselfish decision at fourteen. Op is an awesome person.

Quoting jessie0221:

Good for you.  Seriously.  I don't know if I could be as mature and unselfish at 14.  

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Mrs.Bolin
by Gold Member on Sep. 18, 2013 at 9:07 PM

You are one of the best moms for making that selfless decision to do whats best for you child. The hell with all the selfish jerks out there that disagree. Bunch of losers! Makes me sick of all the parents out there that choose for thier child to live in poverty and filth when they can and should have given that child a better life. Your amazing!! ;)

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