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What Was the Happiest Year of Your Marriage So Far?

Posted by on Oct. 2, 2013 at 9:47 AM
  • 14 Replies

The First Year of Marriage Won't Be Your Happiest -- So What Year Is?

by Maressa Brown

wedding ringFiction and even our own friends on Facebook would have us believe that the first year of marriage is the best.  That everything is perfectly buoyant when you're wearing those post-"I do" rose-colored glasses, in that blissful post-honeymoon bubble. But as it turns out -- well, at least according to a new "study" by U.K. law firm Slater & Gordon -- married couples are actually happiest in their third year of marriage! Ha, go figure!

Sure, this finding may not be the most scientific, but they definitely seem to be onto something ...

After polling 2,000 people, researchers determined that the first year was all about post-wedding exhilaration (or comedown!), and the second year was about "getting to know one another" (um, not so sure about that, given how often couples live together first these days, but okay ...). But the third year of marriage marked the point when couples "begin to settle into a comfortable co-existence, having come to terms with each other's imperfections," the Telegraph explains. Plus, it's when many couples start to plan on having kids  ... and they're also more used to sharing finances by that point. Makes sense!

I wouldn't doubt that for most couples, there are always some changes or challenges you face after the Big Day that can throw a wrench in your happiness that first year. Unfortunately, a lot of couples are ill-prepared for the reality check of marriage being hard work after the big fantasy wedding. And take it from this newlywed - even being together for years can't prevent you from occasionally struggling as a married couple with issues you may not always see eye-to-eye on -- be it money, household chores, sex, work, health, etc.

However, once you hit the third year of your marriage, like juniors in high school, you finally fall into a happy rhythm! Maybe you get a better grasp of where you can agree to disagree and where you need to compromise. Awesome! Too bad researchers then dangle the threat of the fifth year of marriage -- what they say is often difficult due to "tiredness, increased workloads, and for some couples, children." Eeek! Yeah, I buy that.

But what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right? Researchers found that most couples who successfully made it through the first seven years of marriage were more likely to have a long, happy, and lasting union. Ah, so all you need to do is hit your seventh anniversary, and you'll be maaaade in the shade! Okay, probably not quite. But it is reassuring to know that getting through the hardest parts could lead to even more amazing ones.

What do you think about these findings?

What would you guess is the happiest year of marriage -- or what was your own so far?

by on Oct. 2, 2013 at 9:47 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by Sarah on Oct. 2, 2013 at 2:22 PM

The year I got divorced. My marriage was doomed for the start. I don't really remember the first year as being happy. 

by Gold Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 3:13 PM

With my first marriage, I honestly don't remember.

I do believe the third year will be our happiest year to date for my second marriage.  (we are entering our 3rd year now) things have finally settled down stress wise.  We have found a rythm, a routine in our lives and it works. 

by on Oct. 3, 2013 at 3:52 PM

Still waiting...

by on Oct. 3, 2013 at 6:32 PM

We just had our 12th last Saturday and our 2nd was the best!We went to the Lake and our son was born a month before!

by Michelle on Oct. 3, 2013 at 9:08 PM
We've been married almost 6 years and they have all been happy. Idk if I have a happiest.
by Jennifer on Oct. 3, 2013 at 9:38 PM

We've been together 7 yrs and married 2 months and 11 days. We've been happy for all of them.

by Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 9:42 PM
I find it sad that someone's marriage would actually peak after 3 years. We have been married for almost 18 years and while we are very happy, I don't want to be another 40 years down the road saying my marriage peaked so early.
by on Oct. 3, 2013 at 10:41 PM
1 mom liked this

We have been married almost 12. The first 3 years were the worst. We didn't live together prior to getting married. We are now very happy, well-adjusted and just loving our life!

by Platinum Member on Oct. 4, 2013 at 10:44 AM

I guess it just depends....we have not been on the best terms for years...I don't remember a "happiest" maybe brief spurts of enjoyment here and there.

by Ruby Member on Oct. 5, 2013 at 2:01 PM

I been married 29 years. I think the article makes sense.

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