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Feeling like a horrible parent

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 my list could go on and on but day by day i am feeling worse and worse as a parent. i have 3 boys (8 1/2, 4, & 10months) i am a SAHM since feb. days are pretty routing with getting both older kids to 2 different schools but i get up and im on constant worry mode: getting the house clean, mopping, organizing,doing laundry, breakfast, lunch, pick up drop off, money, bills, husband, everything i want to tackle & feel aweful at the end of the day if i dont get it done. my 4year old is in his terrible 2's late i think, i spend most of my time yelling & getting him to listen is impossible. sometimes the kids wake up & ask me "mom are you a good parent or a bad parent?" i hate yelling & feeling like im the only parent who's kids act up & act out. its embarrassing someitmes if not most of the time. i feel like im not good enough for them and they deserve so much more than im giving them and that they would be better off with outme. (NO im not wanting to harm myself) just if my husband had them and not me. people look at me disgusted sometimes when my kids aren't listening to me like why can't i get a handle on my kids. i love my kids with everything i have i just think they'd be better off. someone can do so much better than i can at raising them. ive tried not yelling, behavior charts, sticker charts, reward systems & nothing works. for me i have tried walks by myself to destress but its not helping. i have depression which doesnt help & im battling weight loss but i just want to see my kids happy or happy to be around me and listen.

by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 9:00 PM
Replies (11-18):
by Ruby Member on Nov. 5, 2013 at 5:10 PM

See your doctor for depression meds. It will help you. You'll be so glad you did.

by on Nov. 5, 2013 at 5:50 PM


by Bronze Member on Nov. 5, 2013 at 7:18 PM
Make it a point to get outside with them for some playing & exercise a few times a week, even daily if possible. Let them be loud and rowdy; you be loud and rowdy too!
by on Nov. 5, 2013 at 8:41 PM
No. You are not a bad mom. You are overwhelmed and need understanding and good people who will love you. I know because I am in the same boat. :)

I could use a little less scrutiny in my life and a break (with pay would be nice).. I am human. I am trying to understand that I just can't do everything to please everyone.

Please be good to yourself. Easier said than done I know.. I feel like no matter what decision I make I fail someone..

I hope you have loving people in your life. I am praying for that closer support in my own life.

I went through some PTSD and I had to pick myself up by my bootstraps and I ignored healing.. and it came down on me hard.

I just put a notice in to one of my jobs today for the sake of sanity and I am heartbroken because once again.. there goes Christmas. I wish I would have had the encourgement I needed to heal back then.. but now I know..

Life is hard. Its okay to admit that. Hugs for you.

You are a good mom. Good moms look within not sit and judge every other mother..
by Member on Nov. 6, 2013 at 1:09 PM
1 mom liked this

SO TRUE! Good advice!

Quoting goddess99:

Are you getting help with your depression? If you haven't seen your doctor, you should. I wouldn't worry about the house work so much, it's not going anywhere, focus on you feeling ok and your kids. Try to enjoy them, who cares if your floor is mopped. Know what I mean?

by Member on Nov. 6, 2013 at 1:14 PM

Talk with somebody, sometimes just getting the stress off your chest can help too. Or journal to get it out. Get some help with your depression if you can, if you dont have ins or dont like being medicated (I dont either) try some natural things, theres plenty out there. I know what you mean too, Im also a sahm and Ive been in a funk for a little while now too. Its hard to have everything and everyone's needs constantly resting on your shoulders. I know. But try and not let those thoughts in. When you start getting upset about things, try and remind yourself to be thankful in this minute, this is all you have right now, tomorrow is NOT ever promised to any of us. Be thankful you get to be a mom to your kids right now. Try and not let the kids behavior get to you, just remind yourself that theyre only children and they are learning.
And honey, dont worry about how ppl are looking at you/saying about you. It doesnt matter. Theres a seat for every ass out there. Some ppl will agree with you and some will not, its just the way it is.
Above all live in the moment and take it day by day.. and get yourself feeling better. If youre happy your children will also be happy. :)

by Platinum Member on Nov. 6, 2013 at 1:52 PM

Hugs...hope things will get better...

by on Nov. 13, 2013 at 5:45 AM

I think your first step is to talk to your doctor about how you feel. I felt very similar and finally talked to him. I did have to take an anti depressant for a while, but things are much better these days.

The second thing that helped me was signing up for fly lady.

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