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Husband rescently caught cheating wants to go to a party where ex will be without me.

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 11:21 PM
  • 29 Replies
OK I guess my title sums it up. I recently found out (2 1/2 months ago) that my DH was talking to ov. Women. He comtacted his ex fiance and ex girlfriends and was trying to hook up. He never did physically cheat but he ssexted several women. He also lied about it strait to my face dozens of times. He never aadmitted any of this until I showed him the proof in black and white. This Saturday our daughter wants to go to her friends birthday party. This friend happens to be an ex girlfriend of my husband:( I have to work so I won't be able to attend. My heart got torn out when I found out my hubby cheated on me with so many women and lied over and over again. I am working it out of course but I am so uncomfortable with him going to a party where she will be (she is single BTW) I can't get off work and go. Do you think I am being terrible for not wanting him to go? MY step daughters mom can take her but it is our weekend. I feel so awefulawful I was such a confident woman, with no trust issues. Now I am freaking out about a dumb party cause I dontdon't want my huhusband to flirt or hook up with another woman. Am I being weird? Or should I just let him go and trust h won't cheat. Thank you
by on Dec. 18, 2013 at 11:21 PM
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Replies (1-10):
famiglia_bella
by Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 12:42 AM
4 moms liked this

Hell no you don't trust him.  You did that already and he lied to your face "dozens of times".  That's a tough situation being that the daughter wants to go to this party.  I'd probably let the mom take her and dh can sit it out.  Betrayal is a tough thing to process and adding salt to the wound isn't doing anybody any good.  Shame on him for not making provision to get his daughter to an event AND keeping you comfortable with it.

Janet
by Ruby Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 12:56 AM
2 moms liked this

I don't blame you for not wanting him to go. He shouldn't even want to go knowing the circumstances.

Momofmenagerie
by Bronze Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:09 AM
1 mom liked this
It wouldn't happen . She either catches a ride with a friend, you ask her mom to take her/ bring her back ( or can you switch weekends), he drops her off and then LEAVES, or SD doesn't go because your husband can't be trusted .

I've always questioned ( and admired) a woman who wants to make a relationship work after a betrayal .... But if you are intent on this working, he should know that re-earning trust take a long, long time and you DO have the right to call the shots in situations such as these.
Saurusmom8
by on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:10 AM
1 mom liked this
Is your husband and my ex friends by chance? Lol! Sounds sooo similar. Wow.

He betrayed you, lied to your face and is disregarding you (has you called you "crazy" yet?)... He should be working on his marriage/relationship with YOU. YOU are his wife! Why should you have to suffer such awkward situations to cover him? This is ridiculous. Let her mother pick her up and take her and your dh can be a decent man and be with his wife.

How can you have a relationship when someone causes distrust and never even admits he is wrong?

What we will endure for sake of our relationships huh?
SJG1013
by New Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:12 AM
1 mom liked this
His ass wouldn't be going anywhere.

What will he do if he doesn't go.
Saurusmom8
by on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:12 AM
2 moms liked this
Why does he need to go? Strange.
Saurusmom8
by on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:15 AM
1 mom liked this
Are you worried that you will be accused of being jealous? He kind of stirred the sleeping shark awake and then he has no one to blame but himself for getting bit. I know for my similar situation he would try to pull a jealous card and it was betrayal and him manipulating to make me "appear" a certain way so he could be a vicitim.

A real man admits his actions.
splatz
by Sarah on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:18 AM
1 mom liked this

Is she one of the people he was talking to? Also, how old is your step daughter? 

godsgirl26
by Bronze Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:23 AM


Quoting Janet:

I don't blame you for not wanting him to go. He shouldn't even want to go knowing the circumstances.

sunnydays27
by Member on Dec. 19, 2013 at 1:56 AM
My step daughter is only 5 Years old and I love her to pieces. She shoulddefinitely be able to go to this party. I guess his ex wife called today and asked if he could take her to the party. It is her weekend and she cannot take her for some reason. WELL, we had a Christmas concert for my step daughter last night and he asked me 6 Times if I was going. Ummmm yeah why wouldn't I. Well, his ex ended up sitting right in front of me and stood by my husband with literally her ass was in his face and she was 2 inches from his leg (not ex ageratting) I was not too bothered but she kept looking at me ant the "energy" was weird. I had a feeling he knew her. He told me after we left and I strait up asked that she was his ex. Gah. Now suddently we are going to her daughters birthday partry?? He says he never talked to her but I cant believe him. He talked or looked up every single one of his exes on fb while I was pregnant. MInd you I had sex with him every day when I was pregnant and I was the happiest prego lady ever. So its not like I pushed him away. I am one of those too nice people.....I never even made him sleep. on the couch when I found out I yelled of course for like 2 hours strait.
His ex wifedoesn't know he cheated and I don't want her to know. I don't know what to do! I want him to say that he is busy and our baby is sick. I!* am also afraid with our adorable baby that all the women will flock to him and he will flirt. I know flirting is not cheating but I am still so mad. I just wish I could go. I would have no prob being there. I am a beautiful woman ( I used to model) I have self confidence always have. So I am nit just being insecure. I am now, I am insecure of my ability to keep my husbands eyes from drifting. !* know he loves me, there is no doubt. I just feel he needs therapy and he hasnt got help yet. One of my husbands close lady friends told me she thinks he has a sex addiction which he refuses to address. I just dont want him to mess up and I will divorce him if he does. I told him that before and I refuse to be an doormat wife. It is not healthy for our girls. Ok Ok I am babbling.
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