Like every year on the night before the night before Christmas, we write our letters to Santa and put them in their stockings. Every night from the day after Thanksgiving, if they are good, they get a visit from Santa and he puts something small in their stockings every night leading up to Christmas. This year, my oldest DS is ten and he is teetering on the edge whether there is a Santa or not, my seven year old DS believes but tries to act cool when brother is around and my six year old DD is full force into the Santa thing.
This year, the ten year old was having his normal attitude he has daily and decided that since he could only come up with three things he wanted, he scribbles it all out and writes NOTHING real big on the page. My DD writes all the things she wants, like baby dolls, a dog (even though we already have two) and jewels. LOL But my middle DS broke my heart. He asked that my SO and I quit smocking (smoking) and a dad for Christmas. Brought tears to my eyes.
Their dad, my ex-husband, has very little to do with them. He doesn't support them in any aspect of their lives from emotionally to financially, he rarely gets them on his scheduled visitation weekends and on the occasion that he does, it's not all weekend nor does he do a very good job with it by letting them watch inappropriate things on tv, plays with things they shouldn't, etc. This past weekend, he called to get them and even though it was technically my weekend, he hasn't said anything about getting them for the holiday and I wanted to make sure they saw him, so I let them go. He goes out yesterday morning to buy them presents and doesn't bother to wrap them, he just hands the presents to him in the Dollar General bags he brought them home in. He makes good money and couldn't be bothered to get them more then a few three dollar toys. While it's not the gift that matters, he could have done better when it comes to this one time a year for them.
I am so upset that my little boy wants things like he does from Santa instead of the things normal seven year olds ask for. He is so innocent and sweet and deserves everything his little heart desires and yet, he wants his mama to quit smoking and a dad for Christmas. Really makes me sad. And while many will think I am a jerk for it, I am going to make sure that I stop over their fathers house and show him the letter his son wrote to Santa. He needs to know the effect his lack of attention and care has on his children. Maybe that will be enough to make him want to be the father he should be to them. My SO has stepped up and started to fill his shoes, but he doesn't want to take their father's place and can never really take his place in their hearts. I just wish their dad knew how much they miss him and want him in their lives and would bother to put forth at least a 10% effort. I don't want my kids to feel they need to ask Santa for such a present.
on Dec. 24, 2013 at 1:12 AM