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Going crazy

Posted by on Jul. 14, 2014 at 10:51 PM
  • 10 Replies

And no, it's not the good crazy.  

I need to vent and I really need support, but people that I know really don't understand and try to offer unrealistic fixes.  Hubby loves me, but he doesn't understand how stressed I am.

We filed bankruptcy, something I never really thought we would ever do.  Our home is in foreclosure, with no known idea of what the bank will do and when.  Since the house is worth so little, the attorney said the bank may walk away from the house and just put a lien on it.  Or the house could be sold at auction, but who knows when.  We don't have a lot of money to just go put down on another home, and to rent something that would fit us is out of our budget.  My mom lives in Florida, and we are in Ohio, she cannot help us even though she would love to.  My dad has no idea about any of this since he would flip out and want to know what we are planning to do.  (Sounds juvenile not to tell him, but you would have to know him.)  My husband's dad and his wife think the solution is to build on their property, but I've done the rough estimation just to get utilities out to the site and it's outrageous.  His mother thinks we can just go out and buy another home.  

Hubby is content just to sit and wait.  I have been trying to box up stuff and clean out the house, but now I've run out of room to store boxes and I'm starting to feel like I'm on an episode of hoarders.  I have boxes filled and more stuff that isn't in boxes yet, things to be gone through and I am not getting anywhere.  I start one room and then I have to stop for whatever reason and then I can't get back to it before someone puts more crap in there.   


by on Jul. 14, 2014 at 10:51 PM
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by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 12:54 AM

Aww sorry you are having to go through this,
Foreclousres can take several months if that happnes

I guess I eould pack stull you don't need/use much of.
Can you afford an apartment somewhere close?
Hugs to you :)

bbyblueAK
by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 4:54 AM
Hugs. I'm sorry your going through such a tough time. I would help pack if I lived closer just to help.
melindabelcher
by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 7:52 AM
Hugs
We lost our house 2.5yrs ago. It was quite the process and we had plenty of time to move out.
We ended up house hoping, sleeping on couches etc.
I hope you find a solution that works for you guys :(
Jinxed8
by Silver Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 10:34 AM

My husband had to let his house go as well before we got married.  He owed more on it than what it was worth on the real estate market, even selling it would not have taken care of the owing mortgage so he stopped paying for it .  Thing is, if we would have known he would have stopped paying his house LONG before.  It took several months for the bank to repo the house, by the time that happened he had moved in with me in a completely different state. it is a long process and chances are the bank will try to work with you before they repo it - especially if it's not worth a whole lot.  

adove01
by Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 4:13 PM

We have already dealt with the bank.  They refused any payment plan we could do.  Everyone tells me it will take years possibly for the bank to do something, but I hate not knowing what we are doing.  They sent us foreclosure notices in February, and that's when we filed bankruptcy.  So we may be running out of time soon.

Quoting Jinxed8:

My husband had to let his house go as well before we got married.  He owed more on it than what it was worth on the real estate market, even selling it would not have taken care of the owing mortgage so he stopped paying for it .  Thing is, if we would have known he would have stopped paying his house LONG before.  It took several months for the bank to repo the house, by the time that happened he had moved in with me in a completely different state. it is a long process and chances are the bank will try to work with you before they repo it - especially if it's not worth a whole lot.  


momofnatalie
by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 4:28 PM

Hugs, I'm so sorry.  I cannot imagine how much stress you are under.  I wish the bank would be able to help you work out a plan to stay.  I am sure you have tried everything under the sun.  I guess you and your DH have to decide to find an apartment to rent or is there any friends or family who would let you stay with them for a few months so you can find the right place to go?

hopealways4019
by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 7:40 PM
Look into programs that might can help..home from being put in foreclosure
adove01
by Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 7:46 PM

I've been looking at apartments, but with 4 kids and animals most won't take us.  My husband's step-mom has a rental home that she said we could stay in, but right now there is another family there and we have to wait for the eviction, since they haven't been paying rent at all.  But they are family too, and my mother-in-law isn't rushing to get them out either.  

Quoting momofnatalie:

Hugs, I'm so sorry.  I cannot imagine how much stress you are under.  I wish the bank would be able to help you work out a plan to stay.  I am sure you have tried everything under the sun.  I guess you and your DH have to decide to find an apartment to rent or is there any friends or family who would let you stay with them for a few months so you can find the right place to go?


momofnatalie
by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 7:58 PM

That's so hard.  I hope you will be able to find something.

Quoting adove01:

I've been looking at apartments, but with 4 kids and animals most won't take us.  My husband's step-mom has a rental home that she said we could stay in, but right now there is another family there and we have to wait for the eviction, since they haven't been paying rent at all.  But they are family too, and my mother-in-law isn't rushing to get them out either.  

Quoting momofnatalie:

Hugs, I'm so sorry.  I cannot imagine how much stress you are under.  I wish the bank would be able to help you work out a plan to stay.  I am sure you have tried everything under the sun.  I guess you and your DH have to decide to find an apartment to rent or is there any friends or family who would let you stay with them for a few months so you can find the right place to go?



Barabell
by Bronze Member on Jul. 15, 2014 at 11:04 PM

Hugs. I'm sorry you aren't getting more support from your spouse. My guess is that he's as stressed as you are, but he's using avoidance as a coping mechanism. I really hope you figure out a living situation soon and are able to get more support from your hubby.

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