Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

To get fixed or to not get fixed that is the question.

Posted by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 1:22 PM
  • 17 Replies

I am married, 23 and preg with my 2nd child. I have been thinking about it for some time now and i was just curious as to what you ladies would think. I am very seriously thinking about getting my tubes tied when i have this child. I have discussed it with my husband. We are both very ok with the idea. I know i am young and some may say dont because you might change your mind. Well yes. I realize that. we have discussed that aspect as well. My husband is adopted and i was told i couldn't have kids when i was younger. So when we first started talking about children we had decided when we could get the money to adopt we would adopt a child. Neither of us want to have any more children untill we are much better off. So if we wanted another down the line we'd really like to adopt a child.

So what do you ladies think?

If you have had the procedure done would you mind sharing your experience, any advice about it that sort of thing. Thanks

 we rock

by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 1:22 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
TristanMitchael
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 1:33 PM
I wanted to get it done at 24 when I had my 2nd but I didn't and now I'm pregnant with my 3rd but it wasn't exactly planned. DH will be getting a vasectomy sometime in the future!
Bamsmom2012
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 1:35 PM

 do you regret not doing it?

i mean i'm sure you love your 3rd that is no question.

Quoting TristanMitchael: I wanted to get it done at 24 when I had my 2nd but I didn't and now I'm pregnant with my 3rd but it wasn't exactly planned. DH will be getting a vasectomy sometime in the future!

 

TristanMitchael
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 1:46 PM
I'm not going to lie, sometimes I still struggle with the idea of a 3rd. We were happy with the two we had and we had a boy and a girl. There's moments I'm excited and others where I wish we had prevented it more. I'msusure once she's here I'll be over the moon and regret ever having negative thoughts.

Quoting Bamsmom2012:

 do you regret not doing it?


i mean i'm sure you love your 3rd that is no question.


Quoting TristanMitchael: I wanted to get it done at 24 when I had my 2nd but I didn't and now I'm pregnant with my 3rd but it wasn't exactly planned. DH will be getting a vasectomy sometime in the future!

 

Bamsmom2012
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 1:59 PM

 see after this little one is born i'll have a little girl 2 in aug and a little boy. there is just something telling me that i need to stop at 2. idk what it is i just can't shake it.

 

Quoting TristanMitchael: I'm not going to lie, sometimes I still struggle with the idea of a 3rd. We were happy with the two we had and we had a boy and a girl. There's moments I'm excited and others where I wish we had prevented it more. I'msusure once she's here I'll be over the moon and regret ever having negative thoughts.
Quoting Bamsmom2012:

 do you regret not doing it?

i mean i'm sure you love your 3rd that is no question.

Quoting TristanMitchael: I wanted to get it done at 24 when I had my 2nd but I didn't and now I'm pregnant with my 3rd but it wasn't exactly planned. DH will be getting a vasectomy sometime in the future!

 

 

momofnatalie
by Silver Member on Jul. 30, 2014 at 7:54 PM

I think if you feel its right then you should do it.  Your doctor may be apprehensive but you can explain about your desire for adoption.  I think if  you follow your heart you won't regret it. 

clairewait
by Bronze Member on Jul. 30, 2014 at 9:10 PM

Dang.

This is a totally personal situation and I'm pretty sure no one can tell you what is right for you.

23 (to me) is still SUPER young. I mean, you make major life decisions in your 20s, but most of those include education and/or career - and possibly spouse. But look how many 20 somethings make decisions they end up undoing in their 30s or 40s.

I was WAY TOO DUMB and inexperienced in my 20s to have even considered such a drastic life changing procedure as getting my tubes tied.

On the flip side, I've been birth control free for almost 2 years now. I've been charting my cycle and using condoms when necessary. Best I've felt IN MY LIFE. It is possible to avoid pregnancy without chemical BC. You just have to be responsible. If you think you are too irresponsible to make something like that work for you, you might consider that you might also not be ready to make a decision about having your tubes tied.

Just thoughts... good luck.

indig0rose
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 9:21 PM

vasectomies reverse easier than tubal ligation. Also, to tie your tubes is a surgical procedure, higher risk. Guys have a shot of Novocaine and 2 snips. then they hold a bag of peas for 2-3 days. 

virgoariesmama
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 10:31 PM
I got my tubal at 23 after I had dd#2 and I have no regrets about it I planned on getting the tubal at 24 that was my personal cut off age for kids. A year after my tubal I got an ablation, laparoscopy, and DNC due to heavy periods and horrible cramps that left me bed bound monthly I will admit I regret that I should have went with a partial hysterectomy. Sorry off topic no regrets about my tubal it was the best decision for myself and my family.
Barabell
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 11:40 PM

I have an IUD as opposed to doing anything permanent. 

It sounds like you and your husband are on the same page, and that's what's important.

hugss
by on Jul. 31, 2014 at 12:02 AM

It is up to you & great your Dh agrees,
Love the idea of adoption down the road for you.

However you are young & one never knows what may or may not happen in the future.
Let us know what you decide ;)

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)