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How Do you Do it

Posted by on Apr. 10, 2015 at 9:19 PM
  • 12 Replies

So alittle over 3yrs ago i went into labor with my 2nd child at 33wks and had to be away from my 1st child for 3 LONG weeks. So i decided im not going to work and id stay home with kids. Husband and I talked about it and both agreed.

Ok so heres my thing. My boys are now 3 and 5 and my 5yr old is in preschool 830-1145 m-th but he will start kindergarten after this summer and my 3yr old will then start Preschool. Right now i feel like im losing my mind between taking care of kids 24\7, 2 dogs, babysitting, and trying to do my housework. How do ya'll manage this without being exhausted or lose your mind?

I will no longer be babysitting after this summer due to my son starting kindergarten and soccer and my youngest going to school to and we are going to try and have our 3rd and last baby in Aug. So after summer things will slow down alil and ill have that time while they are in school but i gotta figure out something now.

So how do ya'll manage ya'lls kids, housework and everything else??

by on Apr. 10, 2015 at 9:19 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Cafe MichelleP
by Platinum Member on Apr. 11, 2015 at 11:04 AM

When I was staying home, I had to have a schedule. I was very scheduled at work. My Franklin plannner was an extension of myself and if something was not in my planner, it didn't get done. I lived by my schedule. So when I stayed home, I applied those same scheduling skills. My kids had nap times, times I ran errands, had practices, appts, etc... I scheduled everything for the first year or so, then things just became a habit and I was able to let loose the reins on the schedule and still get things done.

sonshining
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2015 at 12:00 PM

Ok, so, HELP. Delegate, the chores, the child care, the errands, the dogs. Glad to hear you won't be babysitting anymore, cause that might be the "too much". Who else can help with dogs? Your husband? When the pre-school time happens- do as many chores as you can and also sit back for ten minutes (give yourself a timeout) and breathe. Have tea, hear your favorite songs, etc. You WILL be rejuvenated when you give yourself short breaks. With the newborn coming, well, you know. Ask family members, neighbors, girlfriends, tp help out with an errand here, an hour of childcare there, you can't do it all. Thinking you need to can cause stress. Take care of yourself!! 

jky_67
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2015 at 6:09 PM
1 mom liked this
I personally have a house clear that comes every other week, if that helps. My boys are 5 years apart so it's easier to deal with and everybody has a job. On garbage days, my 10 yo collects garbage upstairs, my 5 yo's job is to pick-up and clean up the playroom. Everything has its place.

Teach them now to start cleaning up after themselves. Dirty laundry goes in the hamper, toys off the floor and no bringing out new stuff to play with until old ones are put away. Dishes are done after each meal (or at least after dinner when daddy can play with the kids); laundry is being washed right before I start cooking dinner and throw it in the dryer after dinner. After kids go to bed, fold laundry, make lunch and lay out their clothes for the next day.

Start the routine now so when school starts, it'll go a lot smoother. I do everything at night so there's very little to do in the morning and we get to sleep in a bit more.
auntangelofsix
by Angel on Apr. 11, 2015 at 6:27 PM
We normally set a schedule and go by it but since things have been a rought for a few months we go with the flow.
WifeNMommy09
by New Member on Apr. 12, 2015 at 4:30 PM

I wish i could get help. My husband helps when he can but he works 2nd shift and his work is an hr away. He has to leave house by 145PM and doesnt get home til anywhere from 1-3AM.

As for family/ friends helping yeah thats a long shot. My family lives in Tx and I live in Ohio where all my husbands family lives and asking them for help is usually like pulling teeth. Most of them complain that i need to toughin up and that i can do everything myself. His mom is always saying that my job as a wife wheather i worked or not is to do all house stuff, cook, clean, take care of kids etc all myself and that im suppous to give my husband a stress free time after work and before. But umm last i recall he helps make some of this mess and these are his kids to. But yeah it will get alittle better after kids are in school and during summer i try and keep kids busy outside ALOT.

Quoting sonshining:

Ok, so, HELP. Delegate, the chores, the child care, the errands, the dogs. Glad to hear you won't be babysitting anymore, cause that might be the "too much". Who else can help with dogs? Your husband? When the pre-school time happens- do as many chores as you can and also sit back for ten minutes (give yourself a timeout) and breathe. Have tea, hear your favorite songs, etc. You WILL be rejuvenated when you give yourself short breaks. With the newborn coming, well, you know. Ask family members, neighbors, girlfriends, tp help out with an errand here, an hour of childcare there, you can't do it all. Thinking you need to can cause stress. Take care of yourself!! 


Mrs.Elsey8486
by Member on Apr. 13, 2015 at 11:28 AM

I have to take my dd8 to school, then take ds10 to a different school(next year they will all be in the same school) they both have to be to school beteen 7:30-8am, no later than 8. Then I drive hubby to work at 8:45, dd5 to school @ 10:30, toddler dance time with my dd's 2&4 at 11:15. Home for a little bit, then pick up my 2 dd's from school @2:20 and straight to pick up DS because he gets out at the same time. Then I have to pick up hubby anywhere between 5-whatever time at night he gets off work(hours vary with his job) I feel like Im never home, & my house wil never be fully clean lol. & next yr they will all be in the same school & full day since DD5 will be in 1st grade, but I will be taking DD4 to preschool. So Im still going to be all over. Its hard, & tiring, but my older kids can help with house work & hubby knows Im gone almost all day

Jinxed8
by Gold Member on Apr. 13, 2015 at 2:07 PM

You just make it work.  It's a question of organisation in my book.   Make a schedule if you have to ... if you find you just "dont have time" keep a diary (an honest one) and see where you need to nip and tuck. 

I stayed home the first year of DD's life and I know the sahms will want my head for this but it was the easiest year of my life.  My house was spotless, I walked my dog at least twice a day, cooked 3 meals from scratch every day, made my own baby food, scrap booked and watched (back then) Oprah every day.  I also did ALL the housework, laundry, Dr appointement, vet appointments, groceries, banking etc etc I even took baby workshops / classes, went out for coffee with my best friend at least once every 2 weeks, and got my nails done once a month. 

When I went back to work I found tricks to make things work out, I would go on cooking sprees on weekends and make a bunch of meals that I would can or freeze for easy re-heating later.  After I got divorced and I was on my own I had to run a super tight ship.  And again, I made it work.  Today I am remarried but I'm so used to running around, working like a machine that's it is just who I am and I still pretty much act like I'm on my own.   Having a schedule, a routine and meal planning helps a ton.

My schedule goes something like this :

  • 6am up - make sure DD is up and dressed, feed breakfast, feed animals, get DD ready for school - send her off on the bus for 7am. 
  • 7am - clean up, make myself a cup of coffee, breakfast, make sure I have something thawing for dinner watch a little TV 
  • 8am get ready for work
  • 9am to 12 work
  • 12 to 1pm - get the mail, prep dinner (crock pot meal or chop veggies, measure ingredients etc)
  • 1pm to 5pm work
  • 5pm to 6pm get home, cook / finish/ serve dinner / eat
  • 6pm to 7pm homework with DD
  • 7pm to 8pm clean up, dishes, pack lunches for the next day , do DD's hair, feed animals
  • 8pm put DD to bed, start a load of laundry (or dishwasher) odds and ends, run errands  
  • 9pm to 11pm watch some TV with DH, fold laundry
  • 11pm shower, then bed

Usually DH and I will deep clean on the weekend, grocery shop and plan the week's menu.  Also last winter DD had art class 6 to 7h45pm every Wednesday and now we play badminton with DD once a week,  every Tuesday 6 to 7pm.  I still make time for it. 

Serabeth06
by on Apr. 13, 2015 at 2:55 PM

I don't babysit. That was the first thing I put my foot down about. If I'm going to stay home to be with my kids, I'm not taking away from my time with them, stressing myself out, messing up our schedule and disrupting our household by babysitting for people. I get used, I don't get paid, it's frustrating. We also don't have pets, another thing I put my foot down about. Until everyone is out of diapers, we have fish. Otherwise, we have a schedule for each day. It's a mix between set times, like DD's bus stop time, and flexible times, like when we sit down for lunch, when I exercise, etc, it usually revolves around the baby's nap schedule. I clean my house as I walk through it all day, so I'll go to the bathroom to brush my teeth and put away everything out, take a Lysol wipe to the sink, toilet, and the lip of the tub, shut the shower curtain, empty the trash, wash my hands, done with that room. Then I'll be walking into the living room, put away anything out. I have the kids pick up their own things, laundry and toys are their responsibility to put away. I do the dishes, vacuum, and sweep every day. The bigger stuff I do when I have time through the week, dusting, tubs, mopping, etc. It's all pretty routine for us now.

chicken13
by Member on Apr. 13, 2015 at 4:33 PM

Organization and multi-tasking are key for me.  

Every day has a minimum....1 load laundry, dishes and dinner.  If I just do that...then the world doesn't fall apart.  Then each day has certain tasks...Monday is bills, inbox, email and bed linens.  Etc, etc.

i only schedule 1 appt or service a day.  2 is just chaos on top of driving the kid everywhere for practice. And no more than 3 a week.

i clump errands.  Bank, post office and gym...cause they are all in the same plaza.  If I need to do 1, then I do all 3.  Etc, etc.

take advantage of the time sitting and waiting.  I have a busy bag...I toss in coupons to be clipped, refunds or rebates, forms that need doing, mending, phone calls that need to be made are written on a slip and tossed in.  Once a week, I clean it out, complete what's left and refill it.  I also toss things in mid week.

i drive a lot because of dd's activities, I always have a cooler in the back.  I can buy groceries anywhere...anytime, even if I'm hours from home.  I just buy 2 bags of ice to go with the food and load it up in the parking lot.  It's saved me dozens of times!

when you cook...do something extra.  Making rice...make twice the rice you need and freeze half.  

And my absolute favorite....Amazon.  

PrincessAsmommy
by on Apr. 14, 2015 at 3:21 PM

I am exhausted and have gone a little crazy wink mini

Actually I have my calendar and our daily routines to thank for keeping things tight and running somewhat smoothly. My kids are 7 and 8 and the little guy I babysit is 5 plus we have a cat and a dog. It can be utter chaos some days but as long as I know when the important things have to happen we can find a way to keep it together. All 3 kids are in school (our are in gr 1 and 2 and the little one in K part time) so I have a couple days a week to myself. These are the days when I catch up on sleep, appointments, and any chores that HAVE to be done. The kids also have their own jobs as does Dh. As long as everyone does what they need to do we can reach the end of the day without much trouble or mess. But some days you just have to sit back and say "screw it!" and let the noise and the mess and the chaos happen knowing everyone is having fun and there's always going to be a chance to clean it up later.

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