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How do you motivate yourself?  Do you feel a sense of accountability?  If you do, then to who?  Does anyone HOLD you accountable?

I kinda feel in my family like people feel so bad for me with the kids always undoing my work that no one holds me accountable for giving up half the time.  I am having a hard time holding myself accountable.  So what is your motivator, is it need or desire for a clean home?  Rebelling over a messy home as a child?  Feeling accountable to someone?  I'm interested to know. 

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by on Aug. 7, 2012 at 11:59 AM
Replies (11-20):
Emeraldmama7
by Member on Aug. 8, 2012 at 3:27 PM
1 mom liked this

I am a sahm and I hold myself accountable.  But I feel like my husband deserves to come home to a clean house and a cooked meal.  I also feel like my kids deserve to live in a clean and organized home.  Keeping my house clean is my job and I want others to know I'm good at it.  Same thing with raising well behaved and well rounded kids.

A clean and organized home, I feel, helps me stay on top of things and spend MORE time with my family.  Most people think that I spend all day cleaning, but I really don't.  I have heavy cleaning days where I get in the grooves and cracks, but most days are just the normal cleaning.  And I think being organized helps us find and put away things quicker.  And it keeps me sane...I hate clutter. 

Although, I had an incredibly abusive relationship in my late teen-early 20's...and I think my ocd in keeping things where I want them was my way to stay in control.  I am a control freak now...and maybe that's in part to me breaking free of that relationship and taking control of my life.  IDK, either way...it's who I am today. 

Bluetick
by on Aug. 8, 2012 at 3:45 PM
My motivation ...... ok the house is a wreck & grandma drops in regularly
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Bluetick
by on Aug. 8, 2012 at 3:46 PM
Who is accountable? ? I guess everyone
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Bmat
by Platinum Member on Aug. 8, 2012 at 4:56 PM

I notice my SIL's place and neighbor's place that are so clean and neat, and I strive to have mine look that nice.

nickygsmommy
by on Aug. 9, 2012 at 12:16 PM

Ignore other people.  You have your dream job.  I've always found it funny how so many people can think being a housewife/SAHM is oppression.  It's one of the best jobs there is.  I work from home, and I'd love to be "oppressed" like that!

Quoting lizmartinez:

I'm accountable to myself. I grew up with neat freak parents in an immaculate home. I was always proud that my parents worked so hard (outside the home, my mom was a SAHM til my sister and I were in school), had pets, took care of us, and still kept a clean home.
I love to be that mom, who when someone drops by unexpectedly, I don't have to beg them to excuse the mess. I love that my friends and family wish they "had one of me at home" and want organization tips from me. It makes me proud to be neat and organized, AND have a life and kids (pregnant with #2 now!). My job is being a SAHM, and I take pride in my mothering and housekeeping abilities, because it IS my career!
DH expects (because I've set the bar) to come home to a clean house, a clean happy wife and son, and a warm meal. Not any different from my expectation of him to go out and earn money and advance in his career.
I get told often that I feel the way I do because I'm oppressed as a house wife...that is as far from the truth as it gets for me. I applaud working women who do it all, but I love being a SAHM and I do it because I choose to.
Sorry I went off so long on this! Lol! Those are my reasons for a clean house ALWAYS! :)


lizmartinez
by on Aug. 9, 2012 at 12:18 PM
Thanks! That's exactly how I feel! It's an awesome job! :)


Quoting nickygsmommy:

Ignore other people.  You have your dream job.  I've always found it funny how so many people can think being a housewife/SAHM is oppression.  It's one of the best jobs there is.  I work from home, and I'd love to be "oppressed" like that!


Quoting lizmartinez:

I'm accountable to myself. I grew up with neat freak parents in an immaculate home. I was always proud that my parents worked so hard (outside the home, my mom was a SAHM til my sister and I were in school), had pets, took care of us, and still kept a clean home.

I love to be that mom, who when someone drops by unexpectedly, I don't have to beg them to excuse the mess. I love that my friends and family wish they "had one of me at home" and want organization tips from me. It makes me proud to be neat and organized, AND have a life and kids (pregnant with #2 now!). My job is being a SAHM, and I take pride in my mothering and housekeeping abilities, because it IS my career!

DH expects (because I've set the bar) to come home to a clean house, a clean happy wife and son, and a warm meal. Not any different from my expectation of him to go out and earn money and advance in his career.

I get told often that I feel the way I do because I'm oppressed as a house wife...that is as far from the truth as it gets for me. I applaud working women who do it all, but I love being a SAHM and I do it because I choose to.

Sorry I went off so long on this! Lol! Those are my reasons for a clean house ALWAYS! :)



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Shlamoof
by Tiffany on Aug. 9, 2012 at 3:42 PM

I grew up in a messy house and am used to it.  I don't like it, bUt I almost don't feel like I can relax when the house is very clean.  No one in my family seems to really care that the house isn't clean and besides offering to help every once in a while, even the in-laws who we live in the same building with and who own the house don't seem to care.  No one seems to care when the house is clean and everyone I live with seems to want to work against me.  It seems like my only real motivator is that it's embarassing to me when people stop in or the in-laws come over, even if they don't seem to care.  Some days that embarassment does not seem enough when I know that all I have to do is not answer the door :\  I really wish people around me cared what my house looks like so I could feel the need to really push and keep it consistently clean just because it should be.

darci16
by Silver Member on Aug. 12, 2012 at 10:29 AM

That is a hard one. I'm sure if you got use to having it clean you could relax. I know you said you have little ones and they don't know any different, they learn what we show them. So I think it's between you and your husband to show them how it can be. I've heard and read that it takes 21 days to break or make habits to become routine. You should talk to your dh and try and get him on board and help you. I think I've read that you are a sahm so of course the majority of it will fall on you, but when dh is home he could help out some. If the kids see the both of you care and the pride you take in a clean home then hopefully they will follow and help at least keep their rooms clean. Remember your house doesn't have to be perfect so all your doing is cleaning. I wouldn't want to live in a perfectly clean home.

 I have my own battles I fight with myself, I am a piler, I will stack all the papers, because I'm not sure what to keep or shred. Alot of it is dh's for his business, he just leaves receipts everywhere, uhggg. But I am working on it, those boxes of papers and stacks take up way to much room. I will get it done one day, I have faith in myself. Good luck to you.

WheelersWife88
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 11:28 AM

I hold myself accountable because I'm a stay at home mom. I like having a clean house it puts me in a better mood. I worry and stress too much if the house is dirty about people stopping over and seeing my mess. I like when my husband comes home and the house is spotless. I also don't want my children growing up in a messy home because I believe that when they are older that is what they will think is ok.

connorsmommy120
by on Aug. 12, 2012 at 11:31 AM

This...exactly!!!!!!!!!!

Quoting Caitlin411:

I do it for my husband and kids. For my husband because he deserves to come home to the house being clean after a day of work. This is my job and I want him to be proud of our house.

I do it for our four kids because I want them to come home to a clean house with their snacks waiting. My mom worked all the time when I was growing up and I don't want that for my kids.


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