Nothing is less important than which fork you use. Etiquette is the science of living. It embraces everything. It is ethics. It is honor -- Emily Post
I agree with this wholeheartedly. Manners, etiquette, civility, no matter what term we use to describe it, has nothing to do with raising that little pinky finger when you are at a luncheon tea.
I remember my grandfather. He would tuck a napkin in his shirt and pick up that soup bowl and slurp his tomato soup down to the last dribble. But he was, perhaps, the man with the best manners. He would make anyone feel at home in his home. He would listen and look at you when you were talking. He was helpful to those that needed help, whether it was holding the door open or giving a ride to someone whose car was in the shop.
His "science of living" is what I think about when I tackle those everyday blips of not-so-good manner behavior with my little one. On the whole, sure, she is well-behaved and pretty great, but we still have to remind her of the pleases and thank yous and especially not interrupting Mom and Dad when they are talking on the phone (a biggie when both parents work from home).
In these little ways, in these moments when we highlight choices she can make to have "good manners," I emphasize the underlying big picture about manners. It is less just parroting back the "right" word to say or the correct way to sit at the table -- which we do work on -- but, it is more than that. We try to help her understand how those actions make others around them feel, about being a good member of her community (whether that community is her family or preschool class or bus rider).
So, this week it is all about manners - the good, the bad, the ugly. We will tackle the main ones we all struggle to get them to remember and some others we may not have even thought about yet.
What is your "pet peeve" manner for kids -- the one manner you are a stickler about?
General... Please and thank you, not interrupting and not yelling
My pet peeve is not saying "please & thankyou" it drives me nuts! I teach high school right now & am constantly correcting the kids. It is kind of annoying that my 4yr old has better manners than 14-18yr olds!
It is pretty sad that you have to *teach* manners to high school kids! Makes you wonder if they were taught them and are just too lazy to use them or if they never learned.
Quoting soccerchik8287:
My pet peeve is not saying "please & thankyou" it drives me nuts! I teach high school right now & am constantly correcting the kids. It is kind of annoying that my 4yr old has better manners than 14-18yr olds!
Saying excuse me, please, thank you. My 3 year old has been saying it for over a year now.
Glad I'm not the only one who has the same thoughts on the manners thing!
Monday Mantra: Saying Yes and Having Fun
- HeatherNYC
on Feb. 20, 2012 at 12:00 AM