17 – move back in with my dad
17 – move to Colorado Springs, Co to live with my in-laws for a few months
17 – move back to my dad’s to finish my pregnancy
18 – move back to Colorado Springs, Co to live with my in-laws after I have the baby
18 – move to Westminster, Co into mine and Marc’s apartment
And the worst part is, though this place has been nothing but problems as far as management is concerned... the actual apartment is nice. The way it is laid out is perfect. The size is perfect. The outside looks nice. I just wish it was as nice as it appeared.
And when I tried to express my concerns to Marc this morning he said "well it will be hard". Yeah, of course it will be hard. That's easy to say seeing as how it is ME it will be hard on, not him. He'll be gone almost 24/7 again. I'll have to do the packing. I'll have to do the unpacking. He'll have to spend one day loading and putting things in the new apartment. That's it. That isn't as stressful as everything I've got to figure out.
- transfer the utilities/internet
- I have to have the internet transfered on the day we move because I have to be able to go to school.
- I have to figure out how to find the time to pack an entire apartment in a months time while going to school online full time (while just getting used to going to school again) and transfer all of our bills, and still take care of the current bills, the cooking, the cleaning and taking care of a very active baby by myself.
- I have to then help load/unload everything while taking care of a very active baby.
- Then... by myself, I have to unpack everything while going to school online full time, make sure all of our bills are taken care of, the cooking, the shopping, the cleaning and taking care of a very active baby (have I mentioned that she is very active?!).
And I've got to do all of that within a month.
I feel overwhelmed. I feel burdened. I feel stressed. And I don't want to do it. I know I can't but part of me wants to say 'if I just live with all these horrible, unlivable issues can we just over look all this drama so I can still live here'. I know I won't say that. I know I can't. I know we need a clean and safe place to live... but that sure is a lot to ask of a person... any person... especially a new mom, a new wife and an 18 year old. Legal status or not... in a lot of ways I'm still just a girl. Mature for my age? Sure... doesn't change I'm still really just a girl still.
It shouldn't be this hard.
I'm going to pray a lot about this and just let God do what he does best and in the mean time I'm going to do my part and find a place and try not to stress about it.
Just... please pray for us! Pray for me. We/I really need it!
Blog Writer of: Following The Path - My blog is about everything! Christianity, recipes, poetry, stories, breastfeeding info, abotion info, pregnancy info, child abuse, photography, videos, milestones, motherhood & marriage! Check it out if you can relate.