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Heart, flesh and mind!! HELP!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 4 Replies
Long story short. Lol The guy I adored and was finally ready to make it "for better or worse" with got married last month.

It was over before it started in 08 but we still fooled around. I thought i could convince him otherwise. Now, i realize it wasnt meant and may never find out how he really felt. Anyhoo, we have a mutual gig we attend every year since 08. Its coming next month.

When i say he is like a drug....its crazy!! Even when i knew it was probably wrong, my flesh and heart wanted him and I wanted him to want me.

So i still stupidly spent time with him. This event is coming and for 3 years its been... in his arms. I know he's married now but its gonna be so weird. Especially, if he brings her.

My flesh will want him and I'm scared. I don't want to not go, i do this every year. I know he is attracted to me, however his priorities may be in order now. I can't slip.

p.s I was just "with" him in November '10 and this past April. Nov. I didnt know about her in April, I had hoped what I'd heard was wrong. I wasn't so i left.

I have more self-respect now its just dang! I wish he wasn't married. The dreams! He was the fist man in awhile that "got" me and knew how to make me feel good. I know I'm loving who he was and who I'd like him to be. I romanticize it, then Im back to reality! He prob wont say a thing to me.

Has this happened to anyone??????
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Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 18, 2011 at 5:40 AM
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Replies (1-4):
beanielips
by Silver Member on Nov. 18, 2011 at 9:00 AM
1 mom liked this
Can't say that it has. Hopefully he will steer clear. Hopefully you can too. Sounds like an ugly mess.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 18, 2011 at 10:39 AM
It is. And, As I was writing it, its funny because i felt strong. I look at it for what it is now. I just have to be honest with myself and lay it all out. Thank God for this forum. I had no one to talk to about it.

What the great thing is....I'm not that woman as I was before. He isn't worth me betraying myself anymore.


Quoting beanielips:

Can't say that it has. Hopefully he will steer clear. Hopefully you can too. Sounds like an ugly mess.

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mp3mom
by Cherrie on Nov. 18, 2011 at 1:12 PM

 "What the great thing is....I'm not that woman as I was before. He isn't worth me betraying myself anymore." I'm glad you realize this. 


brieri
by on Nov. 18, 2011 at 4:10 PM

Its good you can get past.

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