Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Did you loose friends because they didn't understand about your child(ren)?

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Aug. 25, 2011 at 6:53 PM
Replies (111-118):
by on Dec. 22, 2012 at 2:41 PM

I didn't lose friends that way. I just didn't have time to keep up my friendships. Lina took a lot of care, then the testing to see what the problem was, then 1/2 days in school, drs, etc. Right now I really have no friends and with everything that is currently going on with all the kids, & dh I only get alone time when I leave to go do errands & then only if I can get Lina to stay at home. Things are getting worse with her behaviors so I am damned if I take her and damned if I leave her at home.

My Second time around & loving it!
boy n girl     toddler girlLina

The Twins

by on Dec. 23, 2012 at 12:27 AM
2 moms liked this

I've lost friends, gained friends, and figured out my true friends.  It's a roller coaster, but I'd so much rather have my kids than my friends.  

I have friends with and without kids who just dont understand why I can't just call a babysitter or get the kids in the car and go somewhere.  I have made so many friends with special needs children.  And I have found my friends who have stuck around and helped me through it.  

by on Dec. 23, 2012 at 11:45 AM
1 mom liked this

I've become withdrawn from my friends with NT children. On the other hand, I have made new friends with moms who have children with various disabilities. My ASD son's best friend is a boy who was born completely deaf. I love hanging out with the boy's mom and dad. They totally "get it", KWIM?

by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 8:54 AM
1 mom liked this

Yes and no. After we had our son (13yrs old now) I did lose a lot of friends... I think they were very uncomfortable with him and didn't know what to say. I heard, "Doesn't that just break your heart?" all the time. No, it didn't break my heart. I love my son very much and my hubby and I have always looked at him as a blessing, a gift, not as a child to "break my heart." I gained friends though too... other moms of special needs children. I have to say that is something that definitely changed my life. With moms of MHDD children, I don't care at all what their religion is or political view or parenting style is... there is a common thread between us that Trumps everything else. The moms I know in "real life" I can honestly say that I understand. And they can say the same to me. Even though my son may not have the same issues, I truly get where they are coming from. And when the say, "I understand" to me, I know they actually understand. I don't know if that makes sense or not, but it does to me. :)

by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 8:59 AM

No, my friends love Nathan and have been nothing but supportive of all of us.

by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 7:25 PM

 It is amazing who stands by you and who doesn't.  I lost a few, but others came out of the woodwork.  So, I feel lucky not to take it to personally.  It is hard, sometimes, family doesn't understand why I spent sooooo much time in school and not abort when I had the chance.  I knew before baby was born she would have down syndrome.  My daughter is now 16 yrs. old and a great kid.  I feel lucky.

by on Jan. 21, 2013 at 11:06 PM

Yes they call my dd a brat and not disciplined :(

by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 3:13 AM
Yes they looked at me as defective. Lol But I shy away from finding friends because of the judgement.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)