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It's finally happened...they called the police

Posted by on Aug. 3, 2012 at 12:59 AM
  • 15 Replies

My 4 yr old is undiagnosed but I suspect from his behavior he is on the spectrum.  He has an older brother who has Aspergers.  It hasent happened in a long while but tonight.....Tonight, he made his escape from the house and crossed 2 side streets and one major street to go to the Circle K, where they called the police.  

Where was I?  I had told him "No candy treat for you tonight because you stole your daddy's candy and I found wrappers all over the house." Then proceeded to get the other 3 siblings ready for bed.  Daddy was asleep.   I went back to him to make sure his teeth were brushed and **bam** couldn't find him.  Found the Kitchen unlocked. (Yes we have a child lock on the door.  He's a bright boy and can undo it) Then my search began.  Check the yard, check the house, wake up dad, check the neighbor's yards up and down the block, check the house again, ask family to start praying, get in car drive to near by park, getting scared/feeling frantic, find a police car.

Who wouldn't say where my son was..just said that they had him and they would meet me with him at the end of the street.  I had 3 cop cars meet me.  One cop recognized me from the Community meeting last night.  So he saw the effort it takes for me to keep track of my little darlings.  And they are very active little darlings.  They took my information, they gave me no ticket...but I think I'm now on record.  

I feel like such a horrible mother.  I can hear the bashing in my head of where I went wrong, what I should have done, how dare I have 4 kids if I can't take care of them.  Aack!

I don't want to blame my husband, he is stressed out with his job not making ends meet, going to school- trying to find the money to complete this semester's tuition...

It's been a tough, tough day.  Thank God above and his angels, my son is home safe.  AND yes I'll be checking his bed several times tonight.

shrugging

by on Aug. 3, 2012 at 12:59 AM
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Replies (1-10):
skeletor1017
by on Aug. 3, 2012 at 1:07 AM

I'm sorry that happened to you. It's good that someone did call the cops though instead of just ignoring him and letting him just wander on. Big hugs to you. Another post in here

http://www.cafemom.com/group/115120/forums/read/17036354/free_autism_safety_box

Might help you get one of these boxes. They have window/door alarms in them and it could help ease your fears and worries.

Sithpadawans
by on Aug. 3, 2012 at 1:19 AM
Do not beat yourself up over this. You have a runner in the family. A friend of mine had to nail her windows shut and have the alams put on their doors as well as windows cause their son liked to take off. The police already knew cause they told them and dss was even helping them to find therapies and afteer school programs. Point is, everyone knew their kid was a runner and that if they saw the child without any adults around, call the cops asap.

They also got one of those alarms put on their childs bedroom door. If he opened the door during the night to sneak out, it would go off and it was loud enough to wake the dead.
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mandee1503
by Amanda on Aug. 3, 2012 at 1:43 AM
I'm so sorry. That's scary. I would look into getting a door chime. Like you put up for pools. I hope he doesn't scare you again.
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darbyakeep45
by Darby on Aug. 3, 2012 at 6:05 AM

Hugs mama!  I'm sorry this happened but glad he's okay!  You're a great mom...don't even give it a second thought!  I know it's hard!  I agree with Amanda on the door chime...we have an alarm system in our house and every time a door is opened, it beeps twice.  Just a thought!  Good luck!

TommyAbby
by Member on Aug. 3, 2012 at 10:20 PM

I have had this happen to my with my older son. He figured out how to undo locks and would walk down the block to 7-11 for ice cream at 6am. We had to nail the windows shut, put alarms on all the doors, and put key deadbolts (not the kind you just turn the knob) in all the doors also. After a few times of him trying to open the door and the piercing alarm going off, he stopped. Now my daughter is into running out the door if I leave it unlocked when I let the dogs out. luckily, she can only get outside through the garage. 

I feel ya on the report thing. Tommy made it out of the house 2x. The first time he was right at the door as I had caught him leaving while I was coming in from the garage. The second time at 6am, he walked to the 7-11 and a CPS guy was buying his coffee. A report was done, but was unfounded for abuse/neglect after seeing all the alarms and locks we put on that day. It's a scary feeling. BIG hugs to you that you feel better..And get yourself some door alarms!! :)



lifeisajoy
by on Aug. 3, 2012 at 11:35 PM

Hugs hugs mama--huge hugs!!   

letstalk747
by Joy on Aug. 4, 2012 at 12:45 AM

 scary for sure

CameronsMommy23
by on Aug. 4, 2012 at 5:27 PM

 Glad to hear he was found safe and sound!! And don't beat yourself up, it could happen to anyone!

I'd definitely try the door alarms and see if that helps. Big hugs!!

pegleg63
by on Aug. 4, 2012 at 7:51 PM

I saw two replies about nailing windows shut. That concerns me.  What if there is a fire? How do you get out if the window is the only exit?  I think window and door alarms would be a better idea. Glad your child was found safe though.

Madameileen
by on Aug. 6, 2012 at 12:24 AM

I've gotten some good advice.

The box kit for special needs wandering kids sounds good but I dont want to waste it if he kills himself trying to remove the wrist bands, shoe tags would stay on the shoes he would soon chuck.  (I'll still keep it in mind)

I heard the idea of passing around flyers with the message "If you see this child call this number" with a picture of my child on it.

I like the alarm idea for the doors, 

Funny several people mentioned putting bells on the door.  I have several types of bells on the door and a chime that the door hits or moves the air enough to set it chiming. But that CLEAVER boy has got the nack at opening the door gently enought so as not to set any of the bells or chims off.  Amazing!

I'm searching for a behaviorist to evaluate my darling 4 yr old.  I think that before I pass around a flyer I need a valid reason besides the assumed bad parenting that the normal parents would assume me to be.  

People cant comprehend what it takes for us to parent our special kids.  

An old friend of mine told me I was coddling my child too much when I was calming down his latest meltdown.  This was just before my child got the diagnosis of Aspergers.  And my husband was taking HER side.  Grrrrr.  Sometimes husbands dont get what us moms have to go through.

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