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Raising Special Needs Kids Raising Special Needs Kids

Denied an Education because he is not potty trained.

Posted by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:13 PM
  • 12 Replies

I don't know weither to drop this or fight for it.  The basic is this.  My son is denied an edcation because he is not potty trained to the school's definition (Accident once every 3-4 months).  He has an IEP for behavior already.  I explained that he is special needs.  He can use the potty when he wants to, but most time chooses not to.  It's an inconvience for him.  With a regular class room I was hoping he would improve in this area.

I have now completed an official evaluation, diagnosis, ADHD, Anexiety and Development Delalys.  And advised to ask for 504 policy from the school I want my son to attend.

Now this is a brand new charter school that has just opened it's doors for the first time enrolment this July 2012, with cutting edge tecnology, smart boards, I-pad 2 for each student to use, individualized curiculum, heavy on hands on arts and sciences.  I want that for my children.  Although we were encouraged to sign up on the first waiting list this spring, even though I stated that my son had potty training issues and is special needs.  They had us go through enrollment..which was very rushed...given a teacher.  Then on opening day as kids lined up to go in, we were told to leave.  "If he's not potty trained we don't want him here.  You need to take him and leave NOW." I was told.  I was very hurt. I couldn't stop crying.  They told me to get it together and not show the kids I am upset.  I had to leave my daughter there without a last hug, kiss and wish her well on her first day of school.  They didn't want my distress upsetting the kids.  I was heart broken.  Still am.

So now with advice from our child psycologist I call the school back to ask for a copy of the 504 policy for that school and they won't give it to me.  They insist on a meeting.  They said, obviously I didn't understand why my son was turned away. Not potty trained is Not potty trained.

I already anticapate another official "no" and said to them, why have a meeting if you're just going to say no again.  They assure that that is not the case, they say their special ed person will be in the meeting and they will go over with me so I understand WHY my son was refused a place when the school opened.  

They make it sound like the easiest thing in the world to motivate and get my child potty trained.  What part of Special needs child do they not understand?

My psycologist had to ask, so if a child in a wheelchair (not mine) and cannot go to the bathroom by them selves and so are not potty trained, they will not be allowed in this school too?

I'm homeschooling one Asperger child already, he takes up so much of my time.  My ADHD child acts out to get my attention.  He really needs a preschool.  

You would think, since I mentioned several times that he is special needs, they would pull out the 504 form or make this appointment the first time I mentioned it.  I know the school has a huge waiting list for the preschool class.  There is no room for a special needs kid when a regular child could exell much faster with out all the extra needed care.  Right?

Arg!  Fight or forget it.  I can't make up my mind.  Go to the meeting and gain knowledge?  Bring support?  Cancel and forget the meeting.  

I've asked the psycologist office to ask our doctor if she can get a cop of the 504 plan for me.

by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Madameileen
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:16 PM

Last year I tried special ed preschool for 3 yr olds, and the stress and anxiety of getting him dropped off or on the bus was awful.  I don't want to go through that again.  It was a long ride.  This new charter school is less than a 2 minute walk.  A dream come true I thought....until the nightmare began.

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:24 PM

I'm sorry mama!  I honestly don't know...I take it they don't have a special ed program there?  My son goes to a special ed preschool for the medically fragile...there are few children there that are indeed potty trained.  Hugs and good luck!

jjamom
by Michele on Oct. 3, 2012 at 3:40 PM
Is this a PUBLIC charter school? If so, I don't think they can refuse him on the basis of potty training, especially if he has special needs.
lasombrs
by Member on Oct. 3, 2012 at 5:02 PM

our son turned 3 10 days before he started public special ed preschool. We had to drop him off at a special door no one else in the school goes through because as a pp mentioned the whole drop off pick up ordeal was overwhelming but with the seperate enterence he does fine. They allow him even though he is 100% no where near potty trained. A neighbors 9 yo special needs child is also not potty trained and she is allowed to attend and is not wheel chair bound. I would keep pushing. If they have a special ed program I would think its something they have to adjust for him. But maybe not for private schools?

Mipsy
by Chelle on Oct. 3, 2012 at 5:52 PM
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You actually would rather have an IEP becuase the IEP is more legally binding than a 504. What you need is for it to state in the IEP that they will help with potty training. I would also look into getting an advocate who can help you navigate this better.

My son is 4.5 and just now started peeing in the toilet, this is his 2nd yr of preschool and it is written into his IEP that they will work on potty training him (as well as us at home).

girl_incognito
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 5:55 PM
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If he has an IEP he doesn't need a 504. When a child has an IEP they are protected by section 504 automatically. A public school can't completely deny him an education, but they can meet with you and discuss different options. Are you POSITIVE you have an IEP for him? I only say that because something doesn't seem right. Maybe you may have been misinformed. IEP's are not created for behavior, they are made for academic accomadations,modifications, and for giving related services. behavior plans (BIP) are made to go along with an IEP.

if your son has an IEP he can get an aide to help with his issues

mom2zachy122
by on Oct. 3, 2012 at 6:27 PM

Couple of points:

1. If your child is three or four years old and has special needs that, through evaluation by the school have been determined to impeded learning in a regular education setting, then they are required to provide pre-school.  Potty training alone would neither qualify nor disqualify a child for special education services.  If your child does not have special needs that have been shown to impede learning, then they are not required, although they may choose, to provide preschool services.  The exception would be in low performing districts where the state has come in and mandated that they provide services.  In NJ, they are called Abbott districts. If they are required to provide preschool services to all three and four year olds who live in the district, then potty training wouldn't normally keep your child out.  My son was three,we have mandated preschool in our town and he wasn't potty trained.

2. As for the "Get it together" and not being able to give a hug and kiss to your daughter, I think that sucks and is not a very positive attitude, but I don't think there's anything illegal in it.

3. A 504 is a legally binding document.  An IEP is a legally binding document.  A 504 requires and spells out certain modifications to a REGULAR education curriculum to allow a student to be successful in that environment.  This would include potty training, IMO, as long as there are no other, more significant special needs.  An IEP is provided when a child is receiveing SPECIAL education services because the curriculum would need to be modified to a degree that exceeds the parameters of a regular education classroom.  Both are binding but an IEP will always take legal precedence over a 504 and allows for more services, such as PT, OT, and Speech/Audiology.  They are mutually exclusive.....you cannot have both.

To fight or not to fight?  Hmm....not sure what I would do.  Do you have any resources in your area for preschool or daycare?  Even daycare will provide some structure and learning and will give you more 1:1 time with your other son.  Even if you fight it...it could take a lot of time.  In some states, if you take the district to court and lose, you would have to pay court costs.  It seems as if they are still sort of hashing out whether the laws for a charter school are the same or different than the laws for a public school. 

Tough call. 

mandee1503
by Amanda on Oct. 3, 2012 at 7:21 PM

I would fight it, even if your son doesn't go there, that way it helps open the door for another chid eventually. That way they will be more accomadating, and not such jerks about the situation. Also get an advocate or case worker to go with you. Someone who knows the laws and everything.

FoxxyMama1
by on Oct. 4, 2012 at 8:18 AM

If you don't feel 100% strong enough to stand up to these bullies (and that is what they are) bring someone - preferably a lawyer or advocate.  If you are in NJ - PM me and I'll share my attorney's information with you.  Thankfully we've never needed her (she's a dear friend) but this is all she does - educational advocacy.  Also - check your school district's website - there should be a copy of their special needs policy.  If not, call the district office and ask for them to email or fax you a copy.  They'll do it.

letstalk747
by Joy on Oct. 4, 2012 at 11:01 AM

     this

Quoting girl_incognito:

If he has an IEP he doesn't need a 504. When a child has an IEP they are protected by section 504 automatically. A public school can't completely deny him an education, but they can meet with you and discuss different options. Are you POSITIVE you have an IEP for him? I only say that because something doesn't seem right. Maybe you may have been misinformed. IEP's are not created for behavior, they are made for academic accomadations,modifications, and for giving related services. behavior plans (BIP) are made to go along with an IEP.

if your son has an IEP he can get an aide to help with his issues


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