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Raising Special Needs Kids Raising Special Needs Kids

Question, how do single mom's do it?

Posted by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 2:50 PM
  • 8 Replies
I am a single mom to a 9 year old boy with asperger n other mental disabilitys. I can not put him in a after school program because he becomes unstable ending up in the mental institution. I have been terminated from my last two jobs because I have to work on a set schedule. Being in a city that is 24 hours makes finding a job part time from 9-2 or 8-1 almost impossible ...I am the only one to put him on the bus at 7AM n take him off at 4PM. A baby sitter is too expensive. I am certified in phlebotomy, I have a cosmetology license. I have a bus matron certificate an I am certified as a bartender. The hours are not the hours I need to be a by my son side. How do you single mom of special need children manage? Any advice?
by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 2:50 PM
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Replies (1-8):
CameronsMommy23
by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 3:33 PM
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 When I was a single mother I had my mom watch my son so that I could work normal 8-5 type of hours. Do you have any family that can help you out? Or if you make more money working at night maybe family/friends can sit with him while he sleeps so you can work and no once actually has to watch him. Also sometimes churches that do preschool/daycare give single parents a discount or maybe they can watch him free part time if you tell them about your situation. Your pediatrician may be able to get you a refferal for in home care also. Hang in there!

MotherDawn
by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 3:39 PM
1 mom liked this

Wow your plate is full isn't it?  If you have any family around, call on them to help.... if that is not an option, see if there are any programs in your area for special needs children.... check with your church,...... but above all else, hang in there!!!!  things will get better!!

SamMom912
by Silver Member on Oct. 19, 2012 at 3:51 PM
1 mom liked this

Im sure if you had family... you WOULD have asked.. LOL... Im family-less.. so I KNOW there are no options out there sometimes.
That being said... I do have a hubby (who is at work ALL the time-- so I am a single mom in care-- but not in money!) .. I CAN NOT imagine how hard it must be for you.. my heart goes out to you.

Are there other mom's in your sons class at school who are in a similar postion? Perhaps you could trade off afternoon care with them? Then it would seem more like a playdate then a bbster.
Does your son go to public school or private? Mainstream? Can you call your local SEPTA (special education parent teacher association) chapter and see if there is aftercare available for special needs kids in your area? You may qualify for some assistance. Since your son is on the spectrum your special ed board may be able to recommend some other avenues....
City, you say.. what City, I'm outside NYC. U close?

SamMom912
by Silver Member on Oct. 19, 2012 at 3:52 PM
1 mom liked this

BTW your little guy is ADORABLE!!!!!

natesmom1228
by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 4:16 PM
1 mom liked this

I was a single mother for 7 years and you do it because you have no choice. There is another person that depends on you to care for him. Have you applied for any type of assistance? I was able to get baby sitting help and my son went to a theraputic pre school.

Hugs I know how hard it is.

lifeisajoy
by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 5:20 PM
1 mom liked this

Hugs to you!!  group hug

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Oct. 19, 2012 at 5:46 PM
1 mom liked this

Hugs mama!  You do have a lot on your plate...good luck!

livingonce1
by on Oct. 19, 2012 at 7:13 PM

Thank you all for your advice. I live in Far Rockaway and my son is bused to a Private school in Manhattan. I don't have family members that can help. My mother lives in PR, my daughter is 25 and lives in AR. His dad is out of the question because the law will not allow him near us. I was bartending for fifteen years, not only I am getting older, I beat stage four stomach cancer in 2010. With that said staying up at night is very bad for my health. I have asked at my fellowship but everyone works. The older women can not handle his violent melt downs or out burst. I am going to see what I can find threw the city for home child care. The last babysitter quit, she became afraid of my son. He is nine 5'0 and where a 8 in men shoes lol he is a big boy. I am praying that god will open the door some where. I applied for a school crossing guard position in my local PCT they work until 3:30PM/ M-F. I pray they call me. It's a major pay cut but it's still better then nothing. Thank you for your advice, I'm not giving up.

Wish the State would be able to provide jobs for mom's like myself who are in such a bind with there children. I sure I can't be the only one.  boy kissing mom

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