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Raising Special Needs Kids Raising Special Needs Kids

Communication Breakdowns and Mommy Meltdowns

Posted by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 8:14 AM
  • 6 Replies

Morning Mommies.

Had a bad night last night. I got home from work late due to traffic (common occurance but still frustrating) get the kids from daycare and get home. DD comes to me and says she cant find her hamster and asks for my help so we spend the next hour collecting every zhu zhu hamster in her room, she got increasingly agitated with each one I pulled out and lined up on the floor. Finally I tell her I think we have them all it has to be one of these. She throws her hands up and tells me I'm being flushing. So I stop and start thinking about what shes trying to tell me and I say I'm being frustrating? Then I get five minutes of hysterics because "thats what she said" Calm her down and ask what she wants to do with the hamster and she points to the pile of laundry. So an hour later I finally realize she doesn't want the hamster she forgot the word for hamper and I go and retrieve her hamper out of my room. While she angrily cleans up the hamsters because "mommy made a mess"

Well i make dinner and feed the kids and DH still isnt home so I sit down on the couch and reach for a book while the kids play. DH comes home and asks for the salt and pepper after going back and forth I realize that the salt and pepper are indeed no longer on the table where they were thirty minutes prior. I go ask the kids and they produce two now empty containers. After searching I located where the salt was poured on the carpet (pepper is still missing) I clean it up and go take a shower while they finish cleaning up the mess. I come back out and I guess DH was still mad and sent the kids to bed over the salt mess. I go to give them hugs and DD is beside herself upset because she believes she is in trouble for not cleaning her room. I try to calm her down and explain it and DH shows up and gripes at me for babying her. So in frustration with everyone I snapped at her and told her to go to bed and we'd talk tomorrow and she did.

DH spent the rest of the evening mad assuming I was babying her. I spent the night mad because I was stuck. I tried to take a few mommy moments and the kids dumped salt and pepper everywhere. (Last week I tried to sneak a nap during their naptime and they got up, located a marker and colored the walls bed tv carpet everything) I snapped at DD instead of ignoring DH and explaining to her why she was in trouble. I was frustrated with the entire evenings events as it was and lacked the energy to try to reasonably explain to DH why I was angry with him. And totally didnt sleep last night. Now I'm back at work and determined to move past it all but Im still angry/frustrated about it.

How do you balance it all mommys? I know all mommys need a break but between work and housework and bath time I feel like I only see my kids for meals during the week then its off to bed with them to do it all over the next day so I hate taking time away from the little bit I do see them for myself. I already have the kids in daycare almost 10-11 hours a day because of my unavoidable work commute. I cant change jobs because I cant have a lapse in insurance for the kids especially when I've finally found DD a specialist for her APD and OCD who thinks she can help her.

Sorry for rambling but I know if anyone will undersrtand you will.

 

by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 8:14 AM
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Replies (1-6):
1CopaceticMama
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 8:48 AM

I balance just like you did. Just get through the moments. Some days need a glass of wine once I put them down. Other days just go to bed when they do and start the next day. A friend just put this quote up on fb and i think its fitting for this: 

Quote:

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow.” ~ Mary Anne Radmacher


Elyssa414
by Elyssa on Jan. 23, 2013 at 10:16 AM
*hugs*
We all have those times. I got to my breaking point with work and taking care of Lij and the house, so I decided to push forward for 3 more years to get my husband through college so I could stay home... It was crazy hard, and it's still hard managing finances on one income, but it worked for us. I'm not saying you should be a SAHM, just that that's what I had to do in order to get it all done
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Mama2B2008
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 11:09 AM
Thanks mamas I usually feel like I'm handling it a lot better than yesterday it was just one of those days that proves no one is perfect and I probably feel worse about it than DD I think.
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sammygrl77
by on Jan. 23, 2013 at 9:30 PM
((Hugs))I have no idea how I make it through the most stressful times.
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darbyakeep45
by Darby on Jan. 24, 2013 at 7:15 AM

Hugs mama!  I just have to focus on the small things...day by day!

sheila5745
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 7:27 AM

Oh how well I remember the marker on the wall paper in the kitchen.. I think I got upset more than my hubby.

Hugs. I do not know how I got though it all. She is 14 now..

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