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Raising Special Needs Kids Raising Special Needs Kids

PTSD

Posted by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 5:26 PM
  • 25 Replies
Ok I know ptsd isn't technically a special need but I needed a group where someone may be able to give me advice. My oldest son is 6 years old. When he was 4 and in head start he was sexually abused by his schools janitor. Believe me I did everything right got him counseling talked to police and FBI and now the guy is in a federal prison for the rest of his life. Anyway people kept saying oohyour son has adhd so I got him evaluated and they said he shows signs. Well I started taking him to a new counselor that he loves and I like to. He diagnosed my son with PTSD and said in children his age it mimics adhd. I guess besides counseling what can I do to help his ptsd? He has really bad behavior issues since this happened to him which I do understand. For awhile it was getting better but since I brought up getting a job he's done a complete 180 things are bad again. Getting pink skips left and right at school not listening at home being mean to his 18 month old brother. His counselor says my son will have to learn to cope with what happened over and over again for the rest of his life a he reaches new mike stones. He also says every time there's a change my sons behavior will get bad again. I just don't know what to do. How can I justify working when my son needs me and the school is calling on a regular basis again. Will I be able to work again? How can I help my son more at home? How can I help with his ptsd can it ever be cured? Please can someone give me advice
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by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 5:26 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jjamom
by Michele on Feb. 6, 2013 at 6:02 PM

Hugs!  I'm so sorry that happened to your son.  My DH has PTSD from serving in Iraq.  He had it for years and was able to cope well enough to pretty much hide it from me, or at least hide how much it was affecting him.  He was recently diagnosed with unresolved PTSD by the VA.  I can imagine that in a young child, it might manifest itself in a variety of ways and he will have a very difficult time coping at times. Things may trigger it that you might never consider amd it may be a long road to healing for him.  I believe therapy is really the best treatment, although I know a few people on meds for it as well.  I'm not sure you want to go the med route at that age.  Have you asked the Psych for advice on things that can be done at home and school to help him along the way?  Good luck to you. 

mandee1503
by Amanda on Feb. 6, 2013 at 8:08 PM

*hugs* I am so sorry.

sammygrl77
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 10:19 PM
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(((Hugs)))

I have two different forms of ptsd. Complex from sexual assults and kidnapping. And general from the birth of my twins. They both manifest in different ways. Complex (which is not yet widely recognized) causes me to be detached from what happened and I believe is the source of my anxiety and panic disorder. Therapy helped tremendously, but only the right counselor. I went through several before I found the right one that helped me.

I actually thought I was ok, but the birth of my children was so traumatic, it triggered the panic disorder to be 100 times worse then ever before and I finally had to go on medication after 15 years of doing without any. I became agoraphobic, though I am getting much much better now. I can't go to a concert or deal with the public for extended amounts of time, but I can leave my house and go to the grocery store now. But it was really traumatic; i crashed, my ds was born not breathing, and dd was pulled out and the doctor blatently lied). Most people will not go through something traumatic enough to trigger symptoms to come back. I really hope this isn't scaring you, just trying to give all the info I can.

So, just keep trying with the counseling, and maybe try a new one if this one is not helping. The thing that was most enlightening was when I finalky understood and knew that the sexual abuse was not my fault at all. For some reason that is the hardest part to accept. I could say it wasn't my fault, but there was always that little paet that found a way to blame myself. If I hadn't been there, if I had fought harder, if I knew what the person was doing, and so on. Sorry this is hetting long, but I kerp thinking of little thinga that might help.

I remember the counselor flat out said' you were a child. He knee exactly what he was doing and that it was wrong. It was not up to you to change anything that happened. It is 150% on the monster who did it to you.' Those were the words that set me free from blame and everything else. Granted I was an adult at thr time, so it will be more difficult with a child. Anyway, that's pretty much the basics of how a victim's mind works.

(((Hugs))) to your child.
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lifeisajoy
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 10:22 PM
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Thinking of you and your son-I have PTSD--just remember it is not about you-do not take it personally-that is hard-therapy and continue therapy-and to remind him he is safe-he is safe, does he have flashbacks?  Remind him who you are -like I am mommy and you are safe-

Let me think here-does he draw--give him some relaxation things he can choose if he is feeling stressed too much--guide him to those choices if needed

Talk to me anytime-it is late and that is what I can think of right now


lifeisajoy
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 10:27 PM

oh maybe he is having flashbacks if he doing 180 degree turn--that could be a big part-maybe there is a trigger--mine was rooms with closed doors, the color red, men too close

Do you know his triggers?  

flashbacks were he---!!  

Thinking of you and your son!!

sammygrl77
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 10:31 PM
I forgot about the triggers and flashbacks. Those are tough too.


Quoting lifeisajoy:

oh maybe he is having flashbacks if he doing 180 degree turn--that could be a big part-maybe there is a trigger--mine was rooms with closed doors, the color red, men too close

Do you know his triggers?  

flashbacks were he---!!  

Thinking of you and your son!!


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lifeisajoy
by on Feb. 6, 2013 at 10:35 PM
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when you talked about saying not your fault--after I heard that like 100 times then I let myself free and only after 100 times of hearing that though-I tried to commit suicide once years ago due to the horendous and

he--ish flashbacks--

Now I am doing great though and man not to have those flashbacks for years and years is awesome!!!!

OP just reassure your son you are there for him--tell him some days may be hard for mommy too but you are there for him--


Quoting sammygrl77:

I forgot about the triggers and flashbacks. Those are tough too.


Quoting lifeisajoy:

oh maybe he is having flashbacks if he doing 180 degree turn--that could be a big part-maybe there is a trigger--mine was rooms with closed doors, the color red, men too close

Do you know his triggers?  

flashbacks were he---!!  

Thinking of you and your son!!




CameronsMommy23
by on Feb. 7, 2013 at 1:32 AM
1 mom liked this
Big hugs!! I'm sorry to hear all that you & your son have been through. I hope the experiences from the other ladies have helped you.
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darbyakeep45
by Darby on Feb. 7, 2013 at 6:50 AM

Wow mama!  Big hugs!  Welcome to the group:)  

irishmama07
by on Feb. 7, 2013 at 7:40 AM
Thank you all. Yes even his counselor believes he's having flashbacks because of the behavior and he's having nightmares again. Triggers I'm sure he has then I feel bad I'm not quite sure what that are. I know he saw the mans picture on the news a few weeks ago which is when nightmares started. He also doesn't like the idea of school or daycare anymore because of what happened. Idk if that counts as a trigger. The name mike is a trigger. At school a child yanked on his legs and his pants came down a little and he flipped out big trigger luckily the school didn't get mad at him for that. TMI but I think just the idea of a bathroom could be. After he goes number two he won't wipe Unless you stand there and tell him he had too because of what happened.
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