Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Well ds new school is a load of crap.

Posted by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:25 PM
  • 11 Replies

Ds came home with a black eye today. Only the second day he's been at his school. I'm not sure if he will continue the program. He's in a ph program and I don't really think its appropriate for him. These are kids with extreme behavior issues and ds isn't really that bad. He needs a mh class. They have no clue how to help kids with sensory processing disorder even though they have a special school just for autistic kids. Most of ds issues come from his sensory processing disorder. I want to grab ds and hold him and never let him go to that horrible place again.

by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:25 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
JoanahLee
by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:28 PM

Woah! What hapened?  Did the teachers document anything?  I agree, that does not sound like a place id want my son either. 

deadlights86
by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:34 PM


Quoting JoanahLee:

Woah! What hapened?  Did the teachers document anything?  I agree, that does not sound like a place id want my son either. 

I have no clue what the teacher did if she even knows it happened. Ds is only saying I don't know. He doesn't know anyone's name. He made a friend and couldn't even remember if it was a girl or boy. I got no phone call from them I called them and left a message an hour ago and haven't heard back. The story ds told me is that he was outside walking with an adult and picked some clovers when he got back to the class another kid grabbed them and ripped them up so ds kicked him and the kid pulled ds out of his chair and hit him in the face. He came home with ice so SOMEONE knows it happened. I want to cry I didn't really want my ds in this program in the first place but this is what our shity distric approved for him baised on shitty exagerated paperwork from his old school.

jjamom
by Michele on May. 29, 2013 at 3:37 PM
Oh my! Yeah, my son would not be going back if that happened to him on the second day! What is the school saying/doing about the situation? Can your son tell you what happened?
deadlights86
by on May. 29, 2013 at 3:45 PM


Quoting jjamom:

Oh my! Yeah, my son would not be going back if that happened to him on the second day! What is the school saying/doing about the situation? Can your son tell you what happened?

School hasn't said a word I called almost an hour ago. They are supposed to go to laser tag tomorrow. Ds is so upset he doesn't even want to go for that. He's only told me what I put above. He kicked a kid for ripping his clovers that he picked up and the kid pulled him out of his chair and smacked him in the face. Ds is generally not violent unless he is provoked first. Then he doesn't kick or hit all that hard he has very little muscle. He is the smallest and youngest kid in the class.

SamMom912
by Silver Member on May. 29, 2013 at 4:05 PM

Wow. Thats no good. No good at all. I mean, I get stuff happens.

With all due respect, I fully believe (and maybe this isnt what you want to hear) that it takes 2 to tango... but Im guessing you know your son isnt completely blameless in some incidences that happen. I dont necessarily know that he was or wasnt to blame here... but rarely do any kids JUST hit or KICK or act out unless they have been pushed to their limit... now, I know some limits are negligable (a silly look, a wrong word, a accidental brush)- which is a social misunderstanding.. (typical for kids with issues)... but my issue is more with the fact that the school has NOT contacted you.

That they simply sent him home with ice and a black eye without notifying you at all about what happened.. and that there was no communication, and maybe no teacher involvement. He went to school fine and come home with a black eye. A visit to the school nurse? No phone call to you. Unacceptable.
Again, I dont think hitting or kicking or yelling or cursing is an acceptable way to behave in school, but Id be more concerend with what the school is planning on doing ( I dont mean punishment to either of the children) to ensure everyones safety , how instances like this are going to be handled going forward.

Im sorry that your son had a rough day. That absoultely sucks. I know when our kids have issues (SPD, anxiety), they are even more compromised in going to school, attending to things.. that the negative reinforcement of today is just an added issue and problem that no one needed. Not, you, not him..

Id most likely want to sit down with the teacher and the principal and maybe even the head of your special education department. I might even invite my friend who is a special education attorney. If you're unhappy with the school for real and not just upset about today, please reach out to an educational advocate (they are usually free) and check out wrightslaw.com for your rights and your sons rights to a free education. Perhaps there is a better placement for him.

HUGS mom... If I can be of any help at all, dont hesitate to ask.


mandee1503
by Amanda on May. 29, 2013 at 4:40 PM

Oh man, that's terrible! I hope something can change.

jjamom
by Michele on May. 29, 2013 at 4:41 PM
1 mom liked this
I think you posted what was above at the same time I posted, so I missed it!

I agree with Sam's Mom, I would be most concerned that they have not contacted you on their own or even after you contacted them! My children have had minor accudents at school (bumped their head, etc) and we ALWAYS get a call from the nurse.

I would also be insistent on finding out what they plan to do about this going forward. None of these kids need to be in danger at school and they need to have appropriate plans in place to ensure this.

Please update and let us know what happens when they do finally get in contact with you!


Quoting deadlights86:


Quoting jjamom:

Oh my! Yeah, my son would not be going back if that happened to him on the second day! What is the school saying/doing about the situation? Can your son tell you what happened?

School hasn't said a word I called almost an hour ago. They are supposed to go to laser tag tomorrow. Ds is so upset he doesn't even want to go for that. He's only told me what I put above. He kicked a kid for ripping his clovers that he picked up and the kid pulled him out of his chair and smacked him in the face. Ds is generally not violent unless he is provoked first. Then he doesn't kick or hit all that hard he has very little muscle. He is the smallest and youngest kid in the class.


deadlights86
by on May. 29, 2013 at 4:44 PM
Oh I know we probably posted at the same time I just didn't want to repost it. And I got ahold of the therapist over Ds group and looks more like Ds started it. One kid with anger management issues cannot raise a hand at another kid with the same issues. Bad things result.

Quoting jjamom:

I think you posted what was above at the same time I posted, so I missed it!



I agree with Sam's Mom, I would be most concerned that they have not contacted you on their own or even after you contacted them! My children have had minor accudents at school (bumped their head, etc) and we ALWAYS get a call from the nurse.



I would also be insistent on finding out what they plan to do about this going forward. None of these kids need to be in danger at school and they need to have appropriate plans in place to ensure this.



Please update and let us know what happens when they do finally get in contact with you!




Quoting deadlights86:


Quoting jjamom:

Oh my! Yeah, my son would not be going back if that happened to him on the second day! What is the school saying/doing about the situation? Can your son tell you what happened?


School hasn't said a word I called almost an hour ago. They are supposed to go to laser tag tomorrow. Ds is so upset he doesn't even want to go for that. He's only told me what I put above. He kicked a kid for ripping his clovers that he picked up and the kid pulled him out of his chair and smacked him in the face. Ds is generally not violent unless he is provoked first. Then he doesn't kick or hit all that hard he has very little muscle. He is the smallest and youngest kid in the class.


SamMom912
by Silver Member on May. 29, 2013 at 4:51 PM
1 mom liked this

 well why werent you notified? It doesnt really matter who started what.. that is not the issue...
We all act out when the demands of the day exceed what we can handle. Its a shame our kids cant handle more.... or get pushed to their limits to squickly...I feel your pain.. My son isnt a kicker, he is a yeller and a screamer... (but, hey, I like to think we all are when we are pushed.... I KNOW I am ---you can even throw in a curse or 2!) But my concern for you and your son is that the school did not reach out. You were not notified and YOU had to track them down to get to the bottom of it. In my eyes that's still super crappy of them.


Quoting deadlights86:

Oh I know we probably posted at the same time I just didn't want to repost it. And I got ahold of the therapist over Ds group and looks more like Ds started it. One kid with anger management issues cannot raise a hand at another kid with the same issues. Bad things result.

Quoting jjamom:

I think you posted what was above at the same time I posted, so I missed it!



I agree with Sam's Mom, I would be most concerned that they have not contacted you on their own or even after you contacted them! My children have had minor accudents at school (bumped their head, etc) and we ALWAYS get a call from the nurse.



I would also be insistent on finding out what they plan to do about this going forward. None of these kids need to be in danger at school and they need to have appropriate plans in place to ensure this.



Please update and let us know what happens when they do finally get in contact with you!




Quoting deadlights86:


Quoting jjamom:

Oh my! Yeah, my son would not be going back if that happened to him on the second day! What is the school saying/doing about the situation? Can your son tell you what happened?


School hasn't said a word I called almost an hour ago. They are supposed to go to laser tag tomorrow. Ds is so upset he doesn't even want to go for that. He's only told me what I put above. He kicked a kid for ripping his clovers that he picked up and the kid pulled him out of his chair and smacked him in the face. Ds is generally not violent unless he is provoked first. Then he doesn't kick or hit all that hard he has very little muscle. He is the smallest and youngest kid in the class.



 

deadlights86
by on May. 29, 2013 at 6:08 PM
1 mom liked this

The group leader was changed and since ds just started there yesterday my contact info wasn't in the log yet the group leader had to track down the therapist who gave her my number. By the time everything was straightened out on their end I had already contacted them and got the full story straightened out but they now know they better call me asap if something like that happens or I they will be hearing from me.

Quoting SamMom912:

 well why werent you notified? It doesnt really matter who started what.. that is not the issue...
We all act out when the demands of the day exceed what we can handle. Its a shame our kids cant handle more.... or get pushed to their limits to squickly...I feel your pain.. My son isnt a kicker, he is a yeller and a screamer... (but, hey, I like to think we all are when we are pushed.... I KNOW I am ---you can even throw in a curse or 2!) But my concern for you and your son is that the school did not reach out. You were not notified and YOU had to track them down to get to the bottom of it. In my eyes that's still super crappy of them.


Quoting deadlights86:

Oh I know we probably posted at the same time I just didn't want to repost it. And I got ahold of the therapist over Ds group and looks more like Ds started it. One kid with anger management issues cannot raise a hand at another kid with the same issues. Bad things result.

Quoting jjamom:

I think you posted what was above at the same time I posted, so I missed it!



I agree with Sam's Mom, I would be most concerned that they have not contacted you on their own or even after you contacted them! My children have had minor accudents at school (bumped their head, etc) and we ALWAYS get a call from the nurse.



I would also be insistent on finding out what they plan to do about this going forward. None of these kids need to be in danger at school and they need to have appropriate plans in place to ensure this.



Please update and let us know what happens when they do finally get in contact with you!




Quoting deadlights86:


Quoting jjamom:

Oh my! Yeah, my son would not be going back if that happened to him on the second day! What is the school saying/doing about the situation? Can your son tell you what happened?


School hasn't said a word I called almost an hour ago. They are supposed to go to laser tag tomorrow. Ds is so upset he doesn't even want to go for that. He's only told me what I put above. He kicked a kid for ripping his clovers that he picked up and the kid pulled him out of his chair and smacked him in the face. Ds is generally not violent unless he is provoked first. Then he doesn't kick or hit all that hard he has very little muscle. He is the smallest and youngest kid in the class.





Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)