Okay, so as everyone already knows by now my husband is out of town, state actually, for a couple weeks. I kind of feel guilty cause I think I should have said something before he left. I didn't tell him because I thought if I did he wouldn't go and if what I'm feeling is true, we are going to need the income. For the last week or so, I wake up sick to my stomach. Not like, actually vomiting, but that ick feeling. It isn't just then though, it usually subsides after my first cup of tea, but comes back about 3 hours later. It also happens periodically throughout the day. Which is something that I went through while pregnant with Heidi. Also, I have been quite fatigued, also something I experienced in BOTH of my pregnancies (I had a still-born son, Aug 2010). Before anyone suggest dehydration, I drink plenty of water daily. You won't see me without me having a huge bottle of water, even in winter. Also to keep myself hydrated I eat lots of fresh fruit and veggies and maintain a healthy diet. That isn't possible. I haven't missed a period, I'm not due for that until the 28th. I am going to get a pregnancy test, but I'm afraid it still may be too early, due to lack of missed period. However, with me being diabetic, the sooner I find out I am or not, the better chances I will have a healthy baby. My only real concerns if I am is:
1.) Our financial stability, I was hoping we would be in a better finanical situatuon before having another baby.
2.) My diabetes, I was hoping I could have lost more weight and have my diabetes completely under control before another child. (It's not completely out of whack, but still acts up sometimes.)
3.) Heidi, I was hoping she would be more further along with her development. Talking, waking, potty trained (or at least starting) before having another baby.
4.) Time, I'm concerned because Heidi still requires a lot of attention, 99.9% of mine and DH's attention. I'm afraid it will be difficult to split my time equally and fairly between two infants. Especially if they are both SN babies.
Now, don't get me wrong, I have a very nurturing, mothering spirit and I will manage if I am. I know if I am we can handle it, I have no doubt about my mothering skills, it's just the reality of it. It can be quite overwhelming, and that's life! Luckily, my family is very involved with Heidi and I'm sure they would be with this potential miracle too. I would LOVE to have another child, but I'm not sure if now is the right time. I'm kind of hoping that I'm not, but if I am, it's just another blessing and I will embrace it. :) I will update after I take the test.