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Raising Special Needs Kids Raising Special Needs Kids

Any Mom's Here With Teen Agers?

Posted by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 6:35 PM
  • 20 Replies

 Hi!

I have a son who we adopted at 12 who has ADHD and ODD. He is now 18 and has graduated from high school.  He is a good kid, but extremely immature. Are there any other members on here who have older children?  I would like to see how they have handled the transition from school to semi adulthood. 

3MOM627

have a nice day

by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 6:35 PM
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Replies (1-10):
britmichele
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 6:37 PM
Mine is only 4, but bump!
mandee1503
by Amanda on Jul. 9, 2013 at 7:07 PM

Here's a bump. Mine are 5 and 2.

mlogsdon
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 7:13 PM
Mines little still. Sorry!
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
letstalk747
by Joy on Jul. 9, 2013 at 7:23 PM

welcome , im joy , my son is 13

bxmom2580
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 7:27 PM
My oldest is only 16
cnsmom
by Bronze Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 7:30 PM
1 mom liked this

We are in the same boat that you are in.  Our son is 18 (with autism) he just graduated in May.  We took a tour of a facility/ school for special needs young adults.  This school teaches life skills, and a trade, and how to act at work, (like stay on task, how to interact with coworkers) they teach how to manage money.  My son isn't sure if he wants to go stay there or not, (it is kind of like going off to college they have a dorm room with a roommate)  but it was a very impressive place.  They said that there are only 3 facilities like that in the US.  They said that there are similar places, but only 3 that you actually live at.

Have you contacted your local Vocational Rehabilitation Center?  That is how we found out about that place, and they will be working with us to find out what he will do next.  I used to think it was hard when he was little, but now we feel lost.  We really don't know what will happen now that he is out of school.  We aren't going to force him to go to that school, (i would miss him so much, he has never been away from home) but we are encouraging him to give it a try.  He has the opportunity to go there for like 8 days for testing. (to find out what he would be able to do, and what he would enjoy doing)  but like I said we are leaving it up to him, because we don't want him to feel like we are pushing him out of the house. (There is no way that we would ever do that to him, he can live with us forever if he wants to) He is just like a really big (6' 3" tall) 10 yr old, only he is almost 19 yrs old. 

Good luck.  Please let me know what you find.  I would love to see other options, and how others deal with the transition into adulthood.

Linagma03
by Gold Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 7:42 PM

Both my teens are typical. So I can't be of any help. Hugs!

3mom627
by on Jul. 9, 2013 at 9:25 PM

 We have been working with our Vocational Rehab counselor. We had initially were told about this place in Johnstown, PA called The Watson Institute. It souds a lot like what you are looking at, but our son is only interested in art and the counselor stated that there are not a lot of jobs in art, so that would probably not be the best choice. 

We are like you, we don't want to force him into doing something just to go to school, so after much discussion and thought, we all have decided on him just waiting awhile until he decides what he wants to do with his life.  It has been a really hard decision because I don't want to short change him.  He is working right now as a dishwasher doing well, but this is definitely not something that he could support himself on his own. 

I definitely have a feeling he may be with us for the rest of his life, anything is possible, but I don't see him living on his own any time soon. But, then again, there are kids who have gone to college and can't find a job other than minimum wage. I am so glad there are other people out there and I totally agree that it has gotten so harder since he is older, 

Quoting cnsmom:

We are in the same boat that you are in.  Our son is 18 (with autism) he just graduated in May.  We took a tour of a facility/ school for special needs young adults.  This school teaches life skills, and a trade, and how to act at work, (like stay on task, how to interact with coworkers) they teach how to manage money.  My son isn't sure if he wants to go stay there or not, (it is kind of like going off to college they have a dorm room with a roommate)  but it was a very impressive place.  They said that there are only 3 facilities like that in the US.  They said that there are similar places, but only 3 that you actually live at.

Have you contacted your local Vocational Rehabilitation Center?  That is how we found out about that place, and they will be working with us to find out what he will do next.  I used to think it was hard when he was little, but now we feel lost.  We really don't know what will happen now that he is out of school.  We aren't going to force him to go to that school, (i would miss him so much, he has never been away from home) but we are encouraging him to give it a try.  He has the opportunity to go there for like 8 days for testing. (to find out what he would be able to do, and what he would enjoy doing)  but like I said we are leaving it up to him, because we don't want him to feel like we are pushing him out of the house. (There is no way that we would ever do that to him, he can live with us forever if he wants to) He is just like a really big (6' 3" tall) 10 yr old, only he is almost 19 yrs old. 

Good luck.  Please let me know what you find.  I would love to see other options, and how others deal with the transition into adulthood.

 

3MOM627

have a nice day

lissadavis
by Member on Jul. 10, 2013 at 12:06 AM

I have 6 kids three of them are currently teenagers, tow 16 year old boys and one 18 year old daughter. My daughter has aspergers syndrome and is doing amazingly well, she is working almost full time and preparing to start school in the fall. I do have the benefit of the aspergers in the way that this is what you do and she does it. She is an amazing student, and received some wonderful scholarships and her school is extremely accommodating, she will have her own dorm room and will be allowed to bring her cat as a companion animal. He is an extraordinary cat. Now for the boys they are add & adhd and bounce between amazing and irresponsible. They both have some wonderful skills, one is an amazing mechanic and the other is a wonderful welder. That being said they still love their video games and time with friends and they tend to blow off schoolwork.

Trabrooke
by Member on Jul. 10, 2013 at 7:16 AM

I have an eighteen year old daughter who has autism and Down syndrome  she is now at  a centre for young adults they teach life skills socialising group settings  she goes 2 days a week   Good luck   

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