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Raising Special Needs Kids Raising Special Needs Kids

I feel like a horrible mother, all I do is yell. I know it's wrong but I cant seem to stop. I have to tell my boys 20 times to do something, it's driving me nuts. My boys are 6 and 7 and just don't listen...I'm calling the school behaviorist tomorrow, and I'm going to get counseling for myself. I'm also going through menopause which isn't helping! Ughhhh thanks for listening ladies!

by on Oct. 14, 2013 at 11:04 PM
Replies (31-33):
girl_incognito
by on Oct. 19, 2013 at 1:01 PM
If anyone says they have never yelled they are fibbing. We are all human and fallible. Yes I lose my cool and I'm not ashamed to admit that I don't always react the right way.
I hope things get better for you soon
raysma07
by on Oct. 19, 2013 at 2:27 PM

Ye si yell do I feel good about it not always but I had to teach my son to use his words instead of hands and this is how we do it .Some people may think that is not goignt o help but even boys with SN have the instinct to ignore . or selective hearing better known as so yes I yell.

DyslexiaParent
by Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 5:25 PM

Get the book "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk"  by Faber, Adele and Elaine Mazlish - The Audio book is excellent so you can hear the inflection in the voice.. A LOT of times, yelling is like saying "YOU STUPID IDIOT!" in tone and is shown by research to be as detrimental to a child as hitting.. There was research published on that just recently.  I USED to be a yeller, but when I found out what it does to kids' self-esteem and used the above book, it really helped me modify my ways.  Basically, it comes down to respectful communication with kids just as you would communicate with your spouse, parents, or others you love--how you WANT people to communicate with you.  It's not an easy transformation to make, but totally worth it for your sake and your kids--then you don't have to feel badly anymore. ;-)  I used to say, "I never wanted to grow up to be a hag," but that's what I felt like.  Hugs and hope it gets better!!

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