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Seriously out of control 3 year old

Posted by on Oct. 17, 2013 at 3:31 PM
  • 28 Replies

I need some major help with my LO. He is 3 years 4 months and smart as a whip. He's learning to read already and enjoys normal preschool type activities. He's very imaginative and enjoys playing with other kids. He is very clingy with me. I'm homeschooling my 6 year old, and we go on lots of outings and get together with other kids. We are consistant with him with discipline, but he's just spiralling out of control. I'm hoping some of you have ideas for us to try before I get a referral to a child psychiatrist.

First off he is always into everything and is always tearing stuff up. I've taken him off the kitchen counters, off the toilet tank, and out of the kitchen cabinets where he was clinging about 5 feet up. And that was just yesterday.I watch him like a hawk, but he's like a stealth ninja or something.  If he doesn't get his way he screams in my face, scratches me, and now he's started biting me. He gets time out either in the corner or in his room every time, but like I said it's gotten worse not better. He's also starting to hurt himself, like punch himself in the head or pull his hair. Today while we were shopping, he bit my hand because I wouldn't buy him a toy he wanted. I left my cart and walked out with him trying to scratch and bite me. When I took him out of the car at home, he flew at me and bit me hard enough on the thigh to draw blood. I sent him to his room where he did something to his eye, not sure what but it was all red. I put him on the couch where I could watch him and he went to sleep. He seems like he's extremely angry and I don't know why. It makes me so sad for him to go through life miserable. Any suggestions?

by on Oct. 17, 2013 at 3:31 PM
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Replies (1-10):
darbyakeep45
by Darby on Oct. 17, 2013 at 3:53 PM

Hugs mama!  Is he in behavioral therapy?  That might be a good idea.

Bluecalm
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2013 at 4:01 PM
No, I'm not familiar with that. Would I just ask his pedi for a referral?


Quoting darbyakeep45:

Hugs mama!  Is he in behavioral therapy?  That might be a good idea.


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darbyakeep45
by Darby on Oct. 17, 2013 at 4:06 PM

Yep.  Remind me what diagnosis your son has....

Quoting Bluecalm:

No, I'm not familiar with that. Would I just ask his pedi for a referral?


Quoting darbyakeep45:

Hugs mama!  Is he in behavioral therapy?  That might be a good idea.



gummibr
by Member on Oct. 17, 2013 at 4:24 PM

Sounds a lot like my bipolar five year old.  Not saying thats what it is but the sypmtoms sound similar.  I would document everything in a book, including photos of any marks on him or you, and possibly videotape episodes and bring everything to the ped for a referal.  Good luck

Bluecalm
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2013 at 4:57 PM
We're still waiting on the test results for 1Q deletion which D has, so no diagnosis. He may be typical, don't know yet.

Quoting darbyakeep45:

Yep.  Remind me what diagnosis your son has....

Quoting Bluecalm:

No, I'm not familiar with that. Would I just ask his pedi for a referral?





Quoting darbyakeep45:

Hugs mama!  Is he in behavioral therapy?  That might be a good idea.






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Bluecalm
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2013 at 5:15 PM
1 mom liked this
I was just talking to a friend who is around the boys a lot. She wondered if he could be jealous of D because he gets a lot of our attention. Last week we had the scare about D's heart, he's having surgery soon, he has speech therapy, etc. LO is very disruptive during speech and at D's doctor appointments. My friend said she'd be happy to do things with D so I can take LO out for some one on one time with me.
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SamMom912
by Silver Member on Oct. 17, 2013 at 5:25 PM

Im not one to rely on Dxs.. I dont think they always matter. it does sound like your son is having a super hard time. im sorry. Sorry for you... And sorry for him.  

My son is 7. he has a DX of Aspie, an anxiety disorder and sensory issues. I only share that because it gives you a picture of what he might be like... 

My son too had a lot of difficulty when things didnt go his way. He was very rigid in his thinking. IF he had an expectation, then any digression from that expectation caused him to act out.  My son s psychologist suggested I read several books... Which I did.. Bt non resonated with me more then "the explosive child"... Cause my son seemed fine... And then something would make him explode... My son wasnt a biter.. He was a yeller.. And on 2 occassions has been a hitter...  But, according to Dr Greene, thats the reaction.. Thats really not important... How we "look" bad is sinply our reaction to being asked to handle more then we can... When we ALL reach our limit, we all "look bad"... ive been a yeller, a hitter, a runner when I cant handle whatever "frustration" that Im unable to handle.. 

im sure youre a cosistant disciplinarian.. And I know I was too. I also know that everytime I was rigid and firm and unyeilding...  My son was too. The more "control" i tried to exert.. The more he would freak out! It wasnt working. I had taken away every toy, game, tv time..I sat him in time out.. I punished... He was down to a mattress and a meal.. And still was NOT doing what I was telling him to do. It was horrible. 

Until this book. Www.livesinthebalance.org-- under LEARN on the left- Why solve problems.....  There are 5-6 short videos. paradigm shifting. Mind blowing. Life altering. 

Hugs! 

darbyakeep45
by Darby on Oct. 17, 2013 at 7:32 PM

Only reason I asked about his diagnosis was because I suggested behavioral therapy and it's usually easier to get if you have an ASD diagnosis.  They don't always matter, but they are extremely important at times when it comes to getting the treatment you need for your child.  

Quoting SamMom912:

Im not one to rely on Dxs.. I dont think they always matter. it does sound like your son is having a super hard time. im sorry. Sorry for you... And sorry for him.  

My son is 7. he has a DX of Aspie, an anxiety disorder and sensory issues. I only share that because it gives you a picture of what he might be like... 

My son too had a lot of difficulty when things didnt go his way. He was very rigid in his thinking. IF he had an expectation, then any digression from that expectation caused him to act out.  My son s psychologist suggested I read several books... Which I did.. Bt non resonated with me more then "the explosive child"... Cause my son seemed fine... And then something would make him explode... My son wasnt a biter.. He was a yeller.. And on 2 occassions has been a hitter...  But, according to Dr Greene, thats the reaction.. Thats really not important... How we "look" bad is sinply our reaction to being asked to handle more then we can... When we ALL reach our limit, we all "look bad"... ive been a yeller, a hitter, a runner when I cant handle whatever "frustration" that Im unable to handle.. 

im sure youre a cosistant disciplinarian.. And I know I was too. I also know that everytime I was rigid and firm and unyeilding...  My son was too. The more "control" i tried to exert.. The more he would freak out! It wasnt working. I had taken away every toy, game, tv time..I sat him in time out.. I punished... He was down to a mattress and a meal.. And still was NOT doing what I was telling him to do. It was horrible. 

Until this book. Www.livesinthebalance.org-- under LEARN on the left- Why solve problems.....  There are 5-6 short videos. paradigm shifting. Mind blowing. Life altering. 

Hugs! 


Bluecalm
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2013 at 7:40 PM
No, he's not on the spectrum.


Quoting darbyakeep45:

Only reason I asked about his diagnosis was because I suggested behavioral therapy and it's usually easier to get if you have an ASD diagnosis.  They don't always matter, but they are extremely important at times when it comes to getting the treatment you need for your child.  

Quoting SamMom912:

Im not one to rely on Dxs.. I dont think they always matter. it does sound like your son is having a super hard time. im sorry. Sorry for you... And sorry for him.  

My son is 7. he has a DX of Aspie, an anxiety disorder and sensory issues. I only share that because it gives you a picture of what he might be like... 

My son too had a lot of difficulty when things didnt go his way. He was very rigid in his thinking. IF he had an expectation, then any digression from that expectation caused him to act out.  My son s psychologist suggested I read several books... Which I did.. Bt non resonated with me more then "the explosive child"... Cause my son seemed fine... And then something would make him explode... My son wasnt a biter.. He was a yeller.. And on 2 occassions has been a hitter...  But, according to Dr Greene, thats the reaction.. Thats really not important... How we "look" bad is sinply our reaction to being asked to handle more then we can... When we ALL reach our limit, we all "look bad"... ive been a yeller, a hitter, a runner when I cant handle whatever "frustration" that Im unable to handle.. 

im sure youre a cosistant disciplinarian.. And I know I was too. I also know that everytime I was rigid and firm and unyeilding...  My son was too. The more "control" i tried to exert.. The more he would freak out! It wasnt working. I had taken away every toy, game, tv time..I sat him in time out.. I punished... He was down to a mattress and a meal.. And still was NOT doing what I was telling him to do. It was horrible. 

Until this book. Www.livesinthebalance.org-- under LEARN on the left- Why solve problems.....  There are 5-6 short videos. paradigm shifting. Mind blowing. Life altering. 

Hugs! 



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darbyakeep45
by Darby on Oct. 17, 2013 at 7:42 PM

Based on what you described, I'd still seek some behavioral therapy.  There are behavioral therapists who aren't ABA certified who can work with all kinds of kids.  Some ABA therapists can work with kids who aren't Autistic as well...my insurance (Tricare) requires that the patient have an ASD diagnosis in order to get the ABA therapy.  It's not like that with all insurances though.  It's definitely worth looking into and asking for a referral as my son's behavioral therapist has worked wonders with him during times like that.  Hugs!

Quoting Bluecalm:

No, he's not on the spectrum.


Quoting darbyakeep45:

Only reason I asked about his diagnosis was because I suggested behavioral therapy and it's usually easier to get if you have an ASD diagnosis.  They don't always matter, but they are extremely important at times when it comes to getting the treatment you need for your child.  

Quoting SamMom912:

Im not one to rely on Dxs.. I dont think they always matter. it does sound like your son is having a super hard time. im sorry. Sorry for you... And sorry for him.  

My son is 7. he has a DX of Aspie, an anxiety disorder and sensory issues. I only share that because it gives you a picture of what he might be like... 

My son too had a lot of difficulty when things didnt go his way. He was very rigid in his thinking. IF he had an expectation, then any digression from that expectation caused him to act out.  My son s psychologist suggested I read several books... Which I did.. Bt non resonated with me more then "the explosive child"... Cause my son seemed fine... And then something would make him explode... My son wasnt a biter.. He was a yeller.. And on 2 occassions has been a hitter...  But, according to Dr Greene, thats the reaction.. Thats really not important... How we "look" bad is sinply our reaction to being asked to handle more then we can... When we ALL reach our limit, we all "look bad"... ive been a yeller, a hitter, a runner when I cant handle whatever "frustration" that Im unable to handle.. 

im sure youre a cosistant disciplinarian.. And I know I was too. I also know that everytime I was rigid and firm and unyeilding...  My son was too. The more "control" i tried to exert.. The more he would freak out! It wasnt working. I had taken away every toy, game, tv time..I sat him in time out.. I punished... He was down to a mattress and a meal.. And still was NOT doing what I was telling him to do. It was horrible. 

Until this book. Www.livesinthebalance.org-- under LEARN on the left- Why solve problems.....  There are 5-6 short videos. paradigm shifting. Mind blowing. Life altering. 

Hugs! 




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