Frustrated with a staff member at my son's school *Update*
So today, I called a cab. We've been taking a cab for the past month already because it's been over -30 deg. celcius. Anways, I have a routine down of calling one at 3, and they almost ALWAYS show up around the time school is out, so around 3:15-/:20 pm. Today, it was one of those days where it hit and miss and came at 3:05.
I went out and let the cab know school is out at 3:20 and he was fine with that. The bell rang, and I saw my son come out of the class (we parents wait in the school lobby by the front doors) and I went over briefly to tell him to get zippered up and don't bother putting on pants. I grabbed his ski pants and backpack and a staff member who is not a teacher (a volunteer or an EA- assistant) got lippy and put her hands on me, "Let him get ready. You need to get back on the carpet". Shocked, I said "yes, I'm aware, but our cab has been waiting for 15 minutes already and we need to go now" and she rolled her eyes and said "Yes, you can leave when he gets ready." Annoyed at this point, I said, "Sorry, I'm not making my cab wait any longer". Do you know how long it would take for my son to get ready? 10 minutes. I've counted and timed in the past. He has SPD and mix that with OCD - if his pants aren't sitting in his boots the "right" way, he could have a complete meltdown and our whole time at the school will be focused on me trying to calm him down and help him anyway. Before recess and home time, my son and a few other children in his class have two designated staff members helping them with their sensory needs and they were not at school today due to illness unfortunately. This staff member whispers to the other grade 1 teacher and points right at me. Hello, high school.
Then, my son tells me that this same woman called him a "liar" because he is in an Alternate Recess program at school for Special Needs children. She sent him back and he tried telling her he's supposed to go to Alternate Recess (which is held in the gym) and he says she grabbed him by the arm but wasn't hurting him, and took him back to the class. He said this woman told him he's NOT Special Needs and that this Alternate Recess wasn't for just anyone to come. Umm, the school counsellor set this up with me way back in October!!! But she wasn't in today.
I don't know the school's policy on teaching children independence but this certain woman seems to be a problem to both me and my son, and I have already contacted the principal and the counsellor to discuss this. I'm bothered by the fact that she grabbed my son, had a verrrrrrrrrrry terse and matter-pf-fact, grouchy tone with me when I was just being polite and helping my son speed up his time getting his jacket so we could leave, and the fact that she felt the need to pull high schooler and gossip about me right in front of me to another staff member.
I may not have conducted myself accordingly and I can admit that - I was in a rush and our cab had been waiting and I told him school was out at 3:20, it was going on 3:30 by the time this all went down, so he was waiting in the parking lot for 25 minutes by then!
I don't wanna be "that" parent, but how can I explain to this woman that there ARE staff who help the children with sensory issues get ready??? According to the school counsellor as well, if the children cannot get ready, and the parents have to leave, they are allowed to help them!!! But for the most part, my son CAN get his pants in his winter boots, but he was wearing jeans, and for those of you SPD moms - you know what those meltdowns are like when children cannot get their jeans in their boots so they're comfortable!!!
She did not apologize yet. I have seen her on Friday and yesterday and this morning. She looked at me, but that was it. I asked my son if she apologized to him and he said she sounds grouchy when he says hi and waves to her. If I don't receive an apology I will let the guidance counsellor know. My son deserves to feel comfortable in his school, and not like he is some big burden on this woman.