One of my bosses sent me this link. It's hilarious!
These are my favorites:
- Hand out your own goals at the beginning of the meeting. “The Speech and Language Pathologist will bark when someone says ‘IEP’ 2 out of 3 times with minimal prompting” Measure goals at the end of the meeting.
- Say “listening ears” whenever they’re not listening to what you’re saying
- Answer everything in the form of a question. Like Jeopardy
- Bring Scooby Snacks and throw one to the person whenever you like what they said.
- Elbow your husband and wink knowingly (but act as if you thought you were being subtle about it and don’t think they’ll notice) at every other, then every third thing someone else says, shifting the pattern every so often, completely randomly. They will go nuts trying to figure out the connection between the statements you’re taking issue with.
- At the end, laugh your ass off and then say “Okay you guys, let’s do the real one”
- Bring your own attendance sheet with celebrity names on them. “Sorry, we either wait for Brad Pitt to arrive or I need you to sign a waiver saying it’s okay that we had this meeting in his absence.”