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Adoptive Moms Adoptive Moms

Adoption & Name Change

Posted by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 9:42 PM
  • 36 Replies

I know most (if not all of us) change our child's last name as part of the adoption process. But I'm curious -- did any of you change any other part of your child's name during adoption? How old was your child at the time of adoption, and did he/she have any input into the name change?

I feel like I'm always seeing/hearing this discussion in adoption circles, and just wondering about our experiences here in this group.

by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 9:42 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mcginnisc
by Claire on Apr. 16, 2012 at 9:49 PM

Yes. We changed all of our dd's name. I was personally torn on this- her name was the only thing she had that she was bringing with her from China...however, she was not named by her first parents. She was named by the Orphanage Director and all of the children had the same surname- Gang. There was no personal meaning to her name at all...On the other hand, I wanted her to feel a part of our family at once so we gave her family names. We did decide not to keep any of her Chinese name since the director named all of the children and her name was difficult to pronounce properly and we did not want her to have problems later in school. 

Her Chinese name was Gang XiaMiao ( Gong She-ah-meow) and we changed it to Lillian ( Heath's GGM) Lin ( Chinese spelling of Lynn- my MIL's middle name and my mother's name is Linda). 

Claire

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ljnnmommy
by Member on Apr. 16, 2012 at 9:53 PM
I changed both my girls names however they were both 16 months old at the time of adoption. I was able to call them be there new names when TPR happened.
Malley
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 10:22 PM
We wanted to change Derek's name because we don't care for it. It is very similar to his bf's name too. He was four and everyone I questioned felt like he was too old. The main reason we kept it though is because my brother is a huge Yankee fan and has sent him a ton of Derek Jeter items. This summer he walked into the room when the game was on, saw him and identified him by name. So we decided he is too tied to his name to change it. Plus my brother would have neen horrified lol. We did change his middle name which we hated. It was for bf's late father. We named him after my father. My dh, dd, and I all chose David's name before he was born so that stayed the same. He was named for my son whose birth name was David. We had moved it to his middle name. David's middle name is for my dh.
I changed the twins' names. My dd had an awful name. They were 9 months
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SarahSuzyQ
by Sarah on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:11 PM
1 mom liked this

I should say that we have filed to change our son's middle and last names, but keep his first name. We do not want to "erase" or attempt to replace his identity, and his first name is perfectly appropriate... And it fits him! His middle name is not inappropriate, but does not fit with the first and would leave him with not-so-great initials.

We gave him a choice between two middle names. He has consistently chosen the middle name that is the same as my husband's, so it will be nice to give him a family name while still keeping his given name as well... Kind of a blending.

He is 4.

DJAKoala
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:20 PM
My oldest son (9) was adopted at age 3. We kept his first and middle names, amazingly his name is one we wanted for a boy (means gift of God)Matthew Ryan
Our youngest son (5) was adopted at age 4. He had two middle names we kept his first name and 1 middle name we love it as well. We dropped the second middle name (Clayton Neil)
Malley
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:20 PM
I like using family names. My son's first name is a derivative of my exh's grandfather's name, my dd's middle name is for my mother, Derek is named for my dad and David for my son and dh.

Quoting SarahSuzyQ:

I should say that we have filed to change our son's middle and last names, but keep his first name. We do not want to "erase" or attempt to replace his identity, and his first name is perfectly appropriate... And it fits him! His middle name is not inappropriate, but does not fit with the first and would leave him with not-so-great initials.

We gave him a choice between two middle names. He has consistently chosen the middle name that is the same as my husband's, so it will be nice to give him a family name while still keeping his given name as well... Kind of a blending.

He is 4.

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underHISwing
by on Apr. 16, 2012 at 11:59 PM

 We added a middle name to my dd, to dss 1 & 2 we changed middle names. My ds 3's first name was changed, we kept his middle name the same.   My dd 1 chose his middle name.  My dd and I talked about what to do with her name.  THe younger two didn't have much input.  At the point where we were filling out birth certificate stuff, my children were 9, 5 almost 6, 4 and almost 3.  My son's first name that was changed shared the first sound.  It was an easy transition, as we often call him by that first sound as a nick name

Isaacsmom913
by on Apr. 17, 2012 at 9:29 AM

Our birth mother did not want to name our son, so we told her what we were going to call him and she had that put on his birth certificate w/her last name. Once his adoption was finalized we did change his last name, but his first and middle are what he was given at birth by us.

aprilz1225
by Silver Member on Apr. 17, 2012 at 9:58 AM

 my son's birthmomasked us what name to we would like to have put on his papers at the hospital. his full name with our last name, that we chose.  so the only thing that was changed on his new bc was us.  Little guys adoption was finalized when he was 10 mons old.  getting social servicies to get move'n was the worse part. 

sillytime
by Member on Apr. 17, 2012 at 10:00 AM
We kept their first names and changed their middle and last!
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