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Adoptive Moms Adoptive Moms

How did you decide...

Posted by on Apr. 20, 2012 at 10:12 PM
  • 14 Replies
...when to add more kids to the family? (Bio, adopted, whatever.)

We are in the process of adopting our 4yo foster son, who is our first and only child. Adding more kids is on the back burner for the moment, but it's an ongoing conversation for my husband and I. :-)
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by on Apr. 20, 2012 at 10:12 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mcginnisc
by Claire on Apr. 20, 2012 at 10:26 PM

ROFL...God made that decision for us. 

Seriously though, we had plans to start the process again in April 2008 which is when China would have allowed us to do so. After 7 years of infertility, a stillborn daughter at 36 weeks, we never wanted to get pregnant again... we had been married for 11.5 years with only 1 pregnancy on Clomid and I got pregnant 8 months after we came home from China. We were NOT ttc and actually never thought I'd get pregnant after all the struggles and medical issues... God has a sense of humor. I was ready to start the paperchase again when I found out that I was 6.5 weeks pregnant and put on complete bed rest until I delivered at 34 weeks. My pregnancy kind blew our adoption plans out of the water. LOL...

Thus the reason the girls are so close in age- 2 years 9 months apart in age...God knows I love a challenge and well, He provided one. 2 girls that will go through puberty pretty much together... *good times* 


Claire

Moderator: Healthy Weight Loss & Adoptive Moms

" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13

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aprilz1225
by Silver Member on Apr. 20, 2012 at 10:47 PM

 we wanted to adopt soon after we adopted our son... but it had drained us money wise so after rebuilding our savings back to were it was, we started saving extra it has taken 6 years . we are doing one more agency adoption for a new born waiting about six months to maybe a year then adopting a sib group from either foster or Swan. not sure yet wich one.

SarahSuzyQ
by Sarah on Apr. 20, 2012 at 10:54 PM

LOL! I definitely thought of you when I posted this question... :)

Quoting mcginnisc:

ROFL...God made that decision for us. 


Malley
by on Apr. 20, 2012 at 11:12 PM
1 mom liked this
I wasn't planning to add another child. My kids were grown and gone and we'd had an empty nest for 8 years. My dh and I talked about having a baby together when we got married. I was 40 and we decided we were too old. Lttle did we know.......I turned 54 the week before we went to court.
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mcginnisc
by Claire on Apr. 21, 2012 at 7:45 AM


Quoting SarahSuzyQ:

LOL! I definitely thought of you when I posted this question... :)

Quoting mcginnisc:

ROFL...God made that decision for us. 


I had a feeling. LOL

Lilly asked the other day why I had to be pregnant and have Karli... I was stunned and said " God decided we needed a Karli Rose." 

I know she wants a sibling that looks like her, but so does Karli and well, that isn't happening! This factory is closed for business and Heath is not on board to adopt again. 

If Karli had been the first, she would have been the ONLY since she is such a handful. 

Claire

Moderator: Healthy Weight Loss & Adoptive Moms

" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13

Join theAdoptive Moms group

wildatheart7462
by New Member on Apr. 21, 2012 at 7:59 AM

My husand and i have two biological daughters, ages three and six.  We added the tree year old when i told my husband i was "missing someone i had never met".  Sounds strange i know.  We fostered throughout this period, with no intentions to adopt, but seeing fostering as a ministry we would do with excellence.  Well... this past year, i had that gut feeling again, someone was missing.  So we talked, prayer and when our homestudy came up for renewal in january of this year we switched from foster to foster-adopt (indicating strong emphasis on legally free children).  Well, we were still currently fostering a seven month old girl who was, as far as we all knew going to FL via ICPC to relatives.  We were also expected to have a long wait for a child to adopt.  April 2nd, our soon to be adopted, ALMOST legally free little boy joined our home.  April 3rd, BM to little foster baby girl contacst DFCS to ask about signing rights over to DFCS on condition we adopt her.  Surprisingly, they agreed to those conditions.  We have court for baby girl thursday so we may be in the process of TWO seperate adoptions this year!  We made ourselves available because i have the feeling it was the right time (thank God my husband trusted my instincts and agreed) and God worked it all out.  I will say, had i knows baby would be adoptable i woulnt have added little boy.  BUT now i am thrilled i didnt know because we all would have missed a blessing.  Also, around the time i was sensing time to adopt, my oldest child (6 years) told me she wanted more siblings.

Isaacsmom913
by on Apr. 21, 2012 at 10:05 AM

Isaac was such a surprise that we've already begun the conversation.  We know that adopting privately the way we did with Isaac is nearly impossible-based on how it happened for us, so we're loosely looking into fostering with the intent to adopt-but somethign keeps preventing me from picking up the phone to call...so I think like you it will just be a "one day I do it"

disneymom2two
by Member on Apr. 21, 2012 at 10:19 PM

I had two miscarriages when my son was a toddler.  After the 2nd, I made the decision to never get pregnant again because I couldn't handle the loss (my pregnancy with DS was highrisk as well).  DH and I just started talking one night about whether we were going to have more children; adoption was the obvious choice since I was not going to get pregnant and we had no desire for a surrogate.  I knew I wanted at least 2 kids.  Now that we have 2 kids, I know our family is complete.  I'm getting older and don't have the patience for more children.

seaniesmommie87
by on Apr. 22, 2012 at 8:43 AM

We got the opportunity and we took it. There really wasnt much of a plan at the time. We had talked about it for about a year prior to beginning the process.

wildatheart7462
by New Member on Apr. 22, 2012 at 3:01 PM

BUMP!

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