Are their any women trying to adopt va Domestic Adoption? I need some help!

[Danni-Jean]

Hello everyone, Im trying to adopt va domestic adoption. I live in Maine so their are some weird rules making it hard for me,and my husband to adopt. We have called alot of differant adoption angency's,and have been very helpful.I even spoke to my laywer. The agency we liked in Vermont  they wanted $7.000 upfront,and $200.00-$500.00 a month for avertisment fees! And they said a adoption threw them can cost up to $40.000.00-$60.000.00(depending on the bio-mothers). My husband,and I have been saving,but no were near that amout yet.My husband,and I have very good jobs.So the child would be taken care of. My lawer here in Maine said I should call jails or go sit in a abotion clinic for a few days all day.To see if I can help a young mom.Or find a women threw friends that would be giving up their baby!  Because I have PCOS,and some outher problems I cant concive on my own. I have tryed IVF once didnt take :( . I have been trying for about 4yrs to have a child and 1yr trying to adopt . Im at wits end I really need some advise,and help!

[Kellyjude1]

 Our adoption was a private adoption within our state.  My only advice or suggestion to you is to inform everyone you know that you and your husband are wanting to adopt.  We also did not have the great amount of money to adopt through an agency or international adoption.  Anyone who knew of us,knew how much we had wanted to adopt.  I never gave up and believe me as the years passed by we felt the chances seemed less and less that we would ever be given the chance.  I continued to pray and follow my heart - we even tried for adoption through our state which unfortunately basically told us there were no children under the age of 5 to adopt.  Unless of course we wanted to foster,which for me would be extremely hard emotionally I just could not do it the thought of having a child/children in our home with the risk of the child leaving  was far too much.  Situations did come our way but each time it ended without adoption.  One day through friends of my mom's my son's birthmom heard about us waiting for years to adopt.  We talked over the phone and we met.  I cannot tell you how happy and excited we were, we knew this could all be a risk but once again we were willing to take that risk.  I am so happy to say we were finally blessed by adoption.  The bond we have with our son's birthmom is so special.  I say continue to follow your heart....adoption can be a long emotionally heartfelt journey with emotions going from pain, hurt to joy and blessing!  Please if ever you have any questions feel free to message me. 

[jen1130]

I have no exp. with private infant adoption sorry. I can share with you what we have done.

We adopted from foster care. Our daughter was born with drugs in her system but is 11 and the most amazing kid ever.
We had 3 bio sons and wanted a girl. We have now adopted 3 more children. Now the kids are 24-4 5 boys 2 girls

We started in mid 99 and fostered 4 kids by the time we got our daughter she was 2 days old born feb 9 2001.
Took some work to get there but it was worth it.
I have never thought of sitting in an abortion clinic,I don't know how well it would go. How would you feel sitting there seeing ladies come out knowing what happened? May work and that would be great to save a baby.
If your goal is a baby with no drugs then I don't know that jail would be the place to meet your babies birth mom.
Good luck

[Danni-Jean]

Thank you for the replays! Idk how it would look me sitting their! I was adopted as well as my 5other sibs. I was the only one that's wasn't threw dhhs . But I still was adopted. My parents have been,and still are foster parents for 45yrs. And I couldn't do that. Idk how my mom did it!

[iuangina]

Never pay anything upfront.  I was always advised that if they are asking for money without providing a service in any industry they have some issues.  Plus, you never know if they are going to shut their doors and you will be out of luck.  Our total cost was around $25K (we had no biomom expenses, our fees were agency and attorneys).    Our fees were broken down based on what they were doing at the time.  For example, we paid for our homestudy once it was completed.  We paid the placement fees - upon placement.  Never pay upfront or at least find out what they are charging you for.  We had to pay a $500 application fee upon signing with the agency, but that was the initial check to see if we were eligible to adopt - financial check, faith check (religious agency), employment check, criminal checks.  

Good luck!  PM me if I can help.